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posted by randomgirl3000
• Accidentally close a tab? Ctrl+Shift+T reopens it.

• Bananas release dopamine, eat them when you’re sad.

• CTRL+SHIFT+ESC is the one handed version of CTRL+ALT+DEL

• Don’t brush your teeth hard, it makes them sensitive and removes enamel.

• Don’t like spiders? Put citronella oil on your walls and they will not go there.

• Drink one glass of water for every alcoholic drink 你 have, you’ll get drunk without getting a hangover.

• Get clear ice cubes 由 boiling water before freezing it

• Heal paper cuts and immediately stop the pain with chapstick.

• If 你 accidentally write on your dry erase board with a permanent marker, scribble over it with a dry eraser marker to remove it.

• If your shoes smell, put them in the freezer overnight, it will kill the bacteria.

• Make bug bites stop itching with a 香蕉 peel.

• Make a paper longer with 12-point text, but 14-point periods and commas.

• Need to get around a blocked website at work? Try replacing the link with link

• Never send your resume as a word file (unless asked) Instead, print it to a pdf file, it’s much cleaner and professional looking.

• Pick a flavor of gum 你 don’t normally chew, and chew it while studying during a test.

• Place a piece of 面包 in a container with your homemade 饼干 and they will stay soft.

• Put a dry towel into a dryer with wet clothes, they will dry faster.

• Put toothpaste on a pimple and it will dry out.

• Practise fake smiling in the mirror every 日 before going to work/school, you’ll genuinely start to feel happier.

• Rub canola/olive oil on knives before cutting onions, 你 won’t cry, alternatively chew gum and 你 won’t either.

• Short on time with a wrinkled dress shirt? Hang it up in the bathroom to steam it flat.

• The night before, place things 你 don’t want to forget the 下一个 morning on 最佳, 返回页首 of your shoes.

• Use hydrogen peroxide to remove blood stains from clothing.

• When cleaning windows use newspapers 或者 coffee filters instead of paper towels, they will not leave streaks.

• When microwaving 面包 products/pizza put a glass of water in with it, it will keep your 面包 from going spongy.

• When 你 移动 into a new place you’re renting, take pictures of any and all damage, then post them on 脸谱 (privately if preferred) so 你 can use the reference 日期 as proof 你 didn’t do it.

• When searching plane tickets online 删除 your 饼干 prior, prices go up when 你 visit a site multiple times.
added by 050801090907
added by 050801090907
added by polarwagon15
Source: SirLordKingDerp
added by Usui--takumi
added by AvatarAang97
Source: ME! ;)
added by -Yusha-
added by boothcrazy425
Source: I MADE THIS MYSELF!!!!
added by someone_save_me
added by BlackMist1
added by Tsukimi621791
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: icanrelate
added by Artemis_8
Source: 谷歌 图片
added by Darkshine
added by alicegirl309
added by EllentheStrange
Source: 谷歌
added by plum-creek-girl
更多 Numa than 你 ever wanted to hear. 链接 to every single Numa song I could find. You're welcome, 或者 maybe not. Here ya'll go.

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link (This one is hilarious)

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link (This one's great too)

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link (sort of)

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posted by LocalArtistist
Do 你 work at Subway? Because 你 just gave me a footlong.
Hi, do 你 want to have my children? [No] OK, can we just practice then?
There will only be 7 planets left after I destroy Uranus.
You're like my little toe, because I'm going to bang 你 on every piece of furniture in my home.
I'm no weather man, but 你 can expect 更多 than a few inches tonight.
Forget that! Playing doctor is for kids! Let's play gynecologist.
Hey babe, how about a 比萨, 比萨饼 and a f**k? [No] What's wrong, don't 你 like pizza?
Do 你 work for UPS? I could have sworn I saw 你 checking out my package.
Your breasts remind me of...
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posted by warriorcats02
Series Synopsis:

It is the 年 3000. Young Entomologist Dex Hamilton is called upon to help when alien insects that were crawling through the galaxy create a dangerous rift between Humans and bugs. Across faraway galaxies Dex will journey, along with 3 companions, Zap Monogan, Jenny 10 , and Tung, "the fantastic frog-boy."

Dex Hamilton:

18 年 old Dex Hamilton is an entomologist, 或者 a person who studies bugs. He owns the habitat, which his father, Winston Hamiton, had owned before. Winston had disapeared mysteriously, leaving the habitat to his son, Dex. The habitat stores all different kinds...
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