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嘿 everyone, I just joined.

I stumbled upon this while surfing the net. I'm posting the ones I thought were the funniest. (I'm not the 作者 of any, of course, and I don't know whom to credit.) Hope 你 like it.


Three things are certain: 
Death, taxes, and 迷失 data. 
Guess which has occurred.

Everything is gone; 
Your life's work has been destroyed. 
Squeeze trigger (yes/no)?

The code was willing, 
It considered your request, 
But the chips were weak. 

Windows NT crashed. 
I am the Blue Screen of Death. 
No one hears your screams. 

Errors have occurred. 
We won't tell 你 where 或者 why. 
Lazy programmers.

ABORTED effort: 
Close all that 你 have. 
你 ask way too much.

Chaos reigns within. 
Reflect, repent, and reboot. 
Order shall return.

This site has been moved. 
We'd tell 你 where, but then
We'd have to 删除 you.

Wind catches lily 
Scattering petals to the wind: 
Segmentation fault

With searching comes loss 
and the presence of absence: 
File not found. 

There is a chasm 
of carbon and silicon 
the software can't bridge

Stay the patient course 
Of little worth is your ire 
The network is down

No Keyboard present
Hit F1 to continue 
Zen engineering?

你 step in the stream, 
but the water has moved on. 
This page is not here. 

Out of memory. 
We wish to hold the whole sky, 
But we never will.

Seeing my great fault
Through darkening blue windows
I begin again
posted by Canada24
#1:
Critic: So our story begins when they spot two children who, 你 guessed it, stopped caring.
Friend Bear: Hi. I'm Friend Bear, and this is Secret Bear. We're Care Bears. (both stand up and pose)
Jason: (in disgusted tone) What do 你 want?
Friend Bear: Only to be your friends.
NC (vo): Actually, I always wondered what counted as quote/unquote "Caring." I mean, if I'm ordering a 比萨, 比萨饼 with a friend, is it like...
[Cuts to skit with two NCs talking to each other]
NC 1: Hey, what kind of toppings 你 want?
NC 2: Eh, I don't care. (In panicked tone) No, no, wait! I didn't mea- (sparkling effects sound...
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Welcome to my complete character index! Basically, over the years I've made up a lot of either my own characters, 或者 added existing ones from shows and whatnot for the sake of entertainment and imagination.

And in this one, you'll see all of them from A-Z, as well as their history. So without further ado, let's get this night off right!

AnimuLuvr21


First Appearance: A 日 In The Life Of A 潮流粉丝俱乐部 User


(The character above is Konata Izumi from Lucky Star)

A character I made in one of my skit articles, and I do plan on using her in 更多 articles, as long as the context fits well.

Personality is...
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I've been meaning to do this for a while. This is a countdown, meaning that number one is the best. Also, this is just my personal opinion so keep your rude 评论 to yourself. I hope 你 like it and please tell me what 你 think.
 10. Gilda Radner. A talented lady.
10. Gilda Radner. A talented lady.
 9. Maia Morgenstern. Mother of 耶稣 in Passion of the Christ.
9. Maia Morgenstern. Mother of Jesus in Passion of the Christ.
 8. Robert Shaw. Ole Quint.
8. Robert Shaw. Ole Quint.
 7. Divine. 爱情 him 或者 hate him, you've got to admire his guts.
7. Divine. Love him or hate him, you've got to admire his guts.
 6. Natalie Wood. Soooo pretty! I've got a crush on her.
6. Natalie Wood. Soooo pretty! I've got a crush on her.
 5. Lionel Barrymore. A wonderful actor.
5. Lionel Barrymore. A wonderful actor.
 4. Sharon Tate. What a woman! My ultimate girl crush.
4. Sharon Tate. What a woman! My ultimate girl crush.
 3. 费雷德 Rogers. Big part of my childhood.
3. Fred Rogers. Big part of my childhood.
 2. G.W. Bailey. Aww, 爱情 this guy!
2. G.W. Bailey. Aww, love this guy!
 1. Sal Mineo. Oh my gosh, I 爱情 爱情 爱情 this man! The first time I saw him was on ‘Escape from the Planet of the Apes’. I’ve been in 爱情 with him for many years. He's the stuff dreams are made of.
1. Sal Mineo. Oh my gosh, I LOVE LOVE LOVE this man! The first time I saw him was on ‘Escape from the Planet of the Apes’. I’ve been in love with him for many years. He's the stuff dreams are made of.
added by 0YouCanFly0
1-Education is the ability to listen to almost anything without losing your temper 或者 self-confidence.
(Robert Frost)

2-The roots of education are 苦 but the 水果 is sweet.
(Aristotle)

3-Education is the most powerful weapon which 你 can use to change the future. (Nelson Mandela)

4-Education is not learning of facts , but the training of minds to think. (Albert Einstein)

5-Education is not preparation for life, Education is life
itself (John Dewey)

6-Education is the movement from darkness to light.
(Allan Bloom)

7-The highest result of education is tolerance.
(Helen Keller)
When a guy flirts with other women.while out with his girl, it. may be he is just trying to be funny and charming 或者 seem polite. 或者 he may secretly be feeling insecure. Maybe he fears his gal is still.into her ex, 或者 worries she may be seeing simeone else besides him. He wont come out and say his fears, so rather he tries to appear 更多 of a stud flirting with ladies. What he may not realize is this drives a gal away and makes her feel unimportant. How would a guy like it if a gal behaved that way toward him? Does anyone have any suggestions how to deal with this obnoxious male behavior? Does a gal call him out on it? 或者 simply walk away, as I did from a guy I loved a lot, and not call him out on it, just simply tell him, "You hurt me."?
posted by deathding
 Let's do this.
Let's do this.
-When I go off to a restaurant/store and the lines are longer than the 亚马逊 River

-When I'm hungry/thirsty but am too lazy to do anything about it

-Doing the same chores every 日 of the week

-Waking up when I'm REALLY tired

-40% of the current generation for being senseless jerks with little to no knowledge of courtesy 或者 grammar

-When someone spoils a movie I wanted to see

-When I bite my tongue/lip

-Random black-outs that interrupt EVERYTHING

-When I go somewhere just to find out that it's been closed for an hour

-Being forced to go somewhere when I REALLY don't want to

-School Days, both the anime...
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(I made this around two years 以前 and never finished it so..... HERE 你 GO. XD)

(By the way, this was originally going to be a video so expect to see some *Insert Here* moments. :P Not that it matters, I doubt anyone will even read all this anyways but WHATEVER. ENJOY.)

Ah, Atari. A classic game company that made so many classic titles. Among those were some of my personal favorites, 蜈, 蜈蚣 and Millipede. First off, Centipede, released in 1981, was a vertically oriented shoot em up classic designed 由 Ed Logg, who also made Super Breakout and co-developed the game Asteroids with Lyle Rains....
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#10: LUCY:
I haven't actually seen this movie, but somebody told me how stupid the ending is.
Lucy reaches 100% of her cerebral capacity and disappears within the spacetime continuum, where she explains that everything is connected and existence is only proven through time. Only her clothes and the black supercomputer are left behind.
And she herself suddenly disappears into thin air.
leaving only a text, saying, "I AM EVERYWHERE!".
It's bad enough Hellsing Ultmate pulled that line..

#9: TWO AND A HALF MEN:
I 爱情 this show, but it become less and less 流行的 after Charlie left. And the producers...
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I wanted to include some of my 最喜爱的 disturbing events in history. This is only a brief overview of the events, I encourage 你 to go research them yourselves. I intentionally included a lot of the lesser known events in history.

0, Ant-walking alligator people of Hiroshima
I know this is an old 文章 that probably no one goes to anymore, but I have something I need to take off my mind. I am a little hard to disturb when it comes to military history, but this... I've been struggling with it all morning. I'll just say this, don't look it up, don't look for the pictures, save yourself the...
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posted by chrystea
你 will need an object(you can carry),a yellow 或者 white candle and pure honey(essencial).
note:this spell can be casted any time,any day.
okay,step one;light the candle and hold it in your left hand.
step2;put a little honey in your mouth(don't swallow)get a pitch of honey on the object,hold the object in your right hand,close your eyes and chant"i call upon the the dark god of magick to protect me from all negative energies and forces that may come my way,may this be my magic wand to make my wish come true so mote it be.
open your eyes,put the wand in the candle fire, let it burn for a 分钟 then after that use the honey to quench fire,BING BANG BOOM! it's done!have fun.
added by 3xZ
1: Step Brothers:
The comedic duo of Will Farrell And John C. Riely, take 你 on a ride as they protray two dimwits who still act like their 14..

2: Dumb and Dumber:
It's amazing to think Jeff Danials is usually a serious actor.
He and Carrey make a perfect pair.
As Jeff dose his best to match with Carrey's, almost childlike, slapstick comedy he became famish for.
Though. Sadly this series ALSO proves how WRONG it is, to have different actors, it only succeeds in "ruining everything"..

3: Anchorman:
Will and Carol are both at their prime in this movie.
And 你 often find yourself repeating EVERY line...
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posted by Directioner3300
Once there was a ghost named Specter and he was very lonely.He had no 老友记 或者 anymore family members.
He was really upset.So one 日 he floated outside just to have a nice look at the scenery when all of a sudden he saw another ghost.
She was floating close to Specter and Specter was very happy!
The femlae ghost introduced herself (Spirit) and Specter did the same.
They both floated around happily in the air holding hands.
Then Specter invited Spirit to his house.
After that they 说 goodnight to each other and became fast friends.
The 下一个 日 Specter and Spirit went flaoting around at the park.When they were floating around Specter asked Spirit if she'd like to be his girlfriend.
So she yes and Specter was delighted!
So now that Specter has somebody in his life he was no longer upset 或者 lonely.He found someone who loved him.
The End
Hello Hello Hello. I see we're back for the third time to play out one of these delightful little games. As 你 have no doubt figured out, I am not Riku114. I suppose 你 can call me....Monty. Now let's get to it. May the favors be forever in your odds....uh....whatever.


BLOODBATH!
As the tributes stand on their podiums, the horn sounds.

Egyptprincess rips a mace out of Springely's hands.

IAMYOURENEMY, Blackpanther, and Hplover work together to get as many supplies as possible.

Dreamtime runs away from the Cornucopia.

Kaboomgirl runs away from the Cornucopia.

Elsafrost runs away from the Cornucopia....
continue reading...
added by blackpanther666
Source: 谷歌 图片
added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com
added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com