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Am sure 你 all already know me for my question:"Does people at your school make fun of what happened at 9/11" where I concluded that only people 由 where I live (Miami, Florida) joke about that. Well turns out they are not the only bastards. I was on Youtube, checking out 视频 about 9/11 for a reason I don't know. So I came across this video, that 由 just looking at the title, 你 know it was made 由 someone who lacks a soul. here is the 标题 of the video:
"9/11-Get the water nigga"
The name to you, may look funny. But when 你 think about what is it about, you'll realize that this is serious...
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posted by -Yusha-
The meme:




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posted by randomgirl3000
I wondered if 你 could hear my 心 in your sleep,
Recognize the smell of my skin in your dreams,
Touch my lips when 你 wake up,
And whisper in my ears while I sleep.

I pondered all that as 你 fell asleep to my heartbeat,
Breathing softly on my chest with one of your hands still feeling me.
And when I wake up it was your lips,
或者 maybe it's all just a dream.

But when I declared "I 爱情 you",
I could feel your lips at my ear,
Whispering the sweet melody,
Of everything I ever wanted to hear.
posted by hgfan5602
Together, at last,
We sing in unison,
As the eagles zoom past us,
Symbolizing true freedom now.

We are together,
Not just our country,
But all the countries of the universe,
Syria, China, Germany,
Russia, Canada, Brazil,
And, of course, the United States.

I have never experienced
Such an amazing feeling
In my whole life,
As the soldiers of the universe
March past,
We are in utmost glory.

The unity of the universe,
We behold right now.
Never again, we shall quarrel,
Fighting with our steel rifles.

We will be free,
Not just blacks,
But all of us,
Together, at last.

We will be equal,
Women and...
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posted by cloudburst
I'm still alive but barely breathing
Just pray to a God that beloved in
Cause I got rime while she got freedom
Cause when a hertbreaks,no it don't breakeven

Her best days will be some of my worst
She finally met a man that's gonna put her first
While I'm wide awake she's no trouble sleeping
cause when a heartbreaks,no it don't breakeven,even,no

What am I suppose to do
When the best part of me is always 你 and
What am I suppose to say
When I'm all choked up and your okay

I'm falling to pieces,yeah
I'm falling to pieces

They say bad things happen for a reason
But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding
Cause...
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*Light starts singing*
7 a.m, I'm waking up in the morning
Gotta have an 苹果 to feed Ryuk
Gotta have a page from my handy notebook
Seeing all the Kira reports going on and on
Everybody's worried
Gotta get down to the bus stop, gotta catch the bus
I see a bus hijacker
What he doesn't know is I have sealed his doom
He gets hit 由 a car and dies
It's Death Note, Death Note!
Gotta kill both bad and good guys!
Everybody's looking 前锋, 期待 to my new world, new world
Death Note, Death Note!
Killing people with the Death Note!
Everybody's looking 前锋, 期待 to my new world
Writing names, 写作 names, YEAH!
Writing...
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posted by johnnyboy-69
Hard drive - Trying to climb a steep, muddy 爬坡道, 小山 with 3 flat tires and pulling a trailer load of fertilizer.

Keyboard - Place to hang your truck keys.

Window - Place in the truck to hang your guns.

Modem - How 你 got rid of your dandelions. Usage: "We gonna modem dandelions"

ROM - Liquor often mixed with Coke

Byte - Beginning of an insult, often followed 由 the word "me" 或者 "this"

Cursor - The person doing the cursing. What some guys do when they are mad at their wife and/or girlfriend.

Tab - What 你 owe the bartender

Shift - How 你 get to a different gear.

RAM - Great truck

编辑 - Past tense of "eat" "Wher'd that leftover possum belly go?" " 你 编辑 afore 你 passed out las nite.

Internet - Where her 鱼 were when she caught em ( In er net).

Fonts - That really cool guy from the show, Happy Days.

Laptop - Where the stripper sits.
posted by 90sfan
Take this 测试 to find out if you're "out of the ordinary".

1.You forgot your homework at 首页 and your teacher wants to know why.You say:
A."I forgot it." B."My pet dragon had 婴儿 on it."

2.Uh-oh.Your dad accidently locked 你 out of the house...AGAIN.What do 你 do?
A.You try to call him from downstairs. B.You get out you're trusty spoon and attempt to dig a hole through the wall.

3.A dog starts to talk to you.You...
A.Run away,screaming. B.Start to break-dance for no reason.

4.For creative 写作 class,your essay is about...
A.Snowboarding. B.Giant wrestling mice.

5.You're walking into the store.You...
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posted by koolamelia
1. The Spell for the Dark Mark "Morsmorde" means Take a Bit out of death in French.

2. Rupert Grint, the actor who plays Ron Weasley owns his own ice cream but cannot legally sell ice creams because he doesn't feel like doing the paper work

3. During filming one of the breakfasts at Hogwarts, Daniel Radcliffe gave all his 培根 to a 10 年 old because he wa sick of having to eat it again and again.

4. Crookshanks is part Kneazle so he can sniff out anyone suspicious.

5. Demetors don't breed, they grow in damp, dark places.

6. To get into The Ministry Of Magic 你 have to dial 62442 to get...
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Here is a 随意 game I saw online. Just think of 随意 ways 你 can kicked out of Wal-Mart
(Don't try this for real life!)

1) Take all of the drinks 你 can find and open them up, spilling them onto the ground

2) (my 老友记 do this, they are so stupid!) Go up to 随意 people, touch them, and say "Tag, your it!" and run

3) Run through the store yelling, "Virgin alert! Virgin alert! All men periscopes down!"

4) Run around the store and hide between displays, clothes, and aisles 唱歌 the mission impossible theme song

5) hide in the clothing rackets and when people come over to check the cloths...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
NEW MEXICO CHILI COOK OFF

If 你 can read this whole story without laughing, then there's no hope for you. I was crying 由 the end. This is an actual account as relayed to paramedics at a chili cook-off in New Mexico. Note: Please take time to read this slowly. If 你 pay attention to the first two judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better.


For those of 你 who have lived in New Mexico, 你 know how true this is. They actually have a Chili Cook-off about the time 万圣节前夕 comes around. It takes up a major portion of a parking lot at the Santa Fe Plaza. Judge #3 was an inexperienced...
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Bunker bustin' mega ultra super, ahh ahhh! Holy crap, ahh!
Oh my god! Oh my god! Oh my god! K.O.!

One-up, power up, already leveled up
Options set to difficult, 爱情 a challenge, typical
Raging through my enemies, kicking 屁股 so happily
Supernova, bend 你 over, to the lava! game over!

I'm saying "Yay!" when I'm knocking 你 right off the stage,
B*tches hate but I don't play, smash a Goomba any day!
I'm on a mission, trying to save the princess!
Dashing, smashing, knock 你 outta commission!

I'm a killer like a Manson, you're blowin' like you're Hanson,
Your powers are weak when 你 go against me,
You...
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posted by MissChicky97
User: I'm the Doctor. I'm a timelord from the planet Gallifrey in the constellation of Kasterborous. I'm 903 years old, and I'm the man who's gonna save your lives and all six billion people below.

Cleverbot: No you're not. You're saying 随意 stock phrases which have no relevance whatsoever to what I say to you.

User: What? WHAT? WHAT?!?!?!

Cleverbot: How is you?

User: I'm trying to save the world and the TARDIS pulled up some 随意 application.

Cleverbot: That is impossible. 你 have no means to do so. 你 cannot feel emotion.

User: OI! I can feel emotions. I'm not completely alien 你 know!!...
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posted by tokidoki123
Slam a guy in the head with hungary's pan,make gilbird peck someone,Throw a 伏特加 bottle on someones head,Yell pasta,Find someone in a 番茄 box,Shoot someone with germany's gun,Show your disgust through the piano,Romano headbash/choke somebody,Buy plenty of sausages at the mart,Call someone Romano/Italy style,give dirty 图书 for christmas,ask england to marry you,get a 螃蟹 stuck in your head,Make bad tea,whip your hair back and forth with france,Eat Too many burgers,talk to panda man,Order the ''F*ck box", Get kidnapped too many times,Float through the air screaming Vodka,Eat 意大利面 with...
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To explain, as I originally put it:

This is Bunny. He's very bloody. If 你 get Bloody Bunny, he'll slowly eat your soul. To pass the curse on, give this to someone else. Tear it up/destroy it/throw it away and Bloody Bunny will murder you.

^I created it. It should also have a drawing of a bunny, with one eyes gouged out sitting on its back, a knif in the temple, and blood under the gouged out eye area and coming from the ear above the none-gouged out eye to the 最佳, 返回页首 of that eye. It should be splattered in blood.


HERE ARE THINGS TO DO WITH BLOODY BUNNY IN PUBLIC PLACES, ANYWHERE:


1. Leave it on...
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posted by pure-angel
    Time and 太空 are fragments of the infinite for the use of finite creatures.
Henri Frederic Amiel

Dost thou 爱情 life, then do not squander time,
for that's the stuff life is made of.
Benjamin Franklin

Time in its aging course teaches all things.
Aeschylus

Make use of time, let not advantage slip.
William Shakespeare

One cannot manage too many affairs: like pumpkins in the water, one pops up while 你 try to hold down the other.
Chinese Proverb

You will never "find" time for anything. If 你 want time, 你 must make it.
Charles Bruxton

I recommend 你 take care of the 分钟 and...
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posted by EppofangirlXD
I found this and found it hilarious:

"The Metric System
"Walks like a foot, talks like a foot, but it's really 30.48 centimeters."
Admit it: America is really screwed up when it comes to measuring anything. We waste a ton of time in school learning our totally whack system. And of course nobody ever remembers how it all works. Who (besides me) knows:

How many ounces in a gallon? (128)
How many inches in a mile? (63,360)
How many acres in a square mile? (625)
How many scruples in a pound? (288)
How many minims in a pint? (7,680)

Okay, those last two were kind of cheating. They don't even try to teach...
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1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well-lighted place with plenty of freshly sharpened pencils.

2. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain 你 understand it.

3. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some coffee to help 你 concentrate.

4. Stop off at another floor, on the way back and visit with your friend from class. If your friend hasn't started the paper yet either, 你 can both walk to the nearby cafe and buy a hamburger to help 你 concentrate. If your friend shows 你 his paper, typed, double-spaced, and bound in one of those irritating see-through plastic folders,...
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posted by invadercalliope
CAALLIIOOPPEE CHHAANNEELL!!!!!!!!!!!!
It's me your host Invader Calliope ^^
Can 你 believe were already on our ninth episode!
TIME SURE FLIES!Welcome to another happy episode of Calliope Channel! Well today were gonna bring another character out! And it's.....Lardnard!
Invader Calliope:SO COME OUT!
Lardnard:Oh *falls*
Invader Calliope:You sound like some nerdy turtle.
Lardnard:Well umm i'm here.
Invader Calliope:FINALLY THINGS ARE PICKING UP AROUND HERE!
Lardnard:Yeah!
Invader Calliope:Yeah.That's how 你 respond.
Lardnard:Umm is there a problem.
Invader Calliope:Ohhh nothing! Oh NO WERE OUTTA TIME BYE ME!
The End!
posted by invadercalliope
Oh-o-o-oa
Oh-o-o-o

Oh-o-o-oa
Oh-o-o-o

Sweet little bumble bee I know what 你 want from me
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Sweet little bumble bee 更多 than just a fantasy
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da

My 心 skips a beat
When 你 walk in the room
I go boom boom boom
You go zoom zoom zoom
You're my playboy, playtoy
Love and my friend
I wanna be with 你 until the end

I give my 心 and my soul to you
To make 你 see its true
Im so confused, baby, cant 你 see
Please come rescue me

Sweet little bumble bee I know what 你 want from me
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Dup-i-dup-i-do la da
Sweet little bumble...
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