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Okay, instead of just 写作 about 随意 things that no one really cares about, I’m going to make a 列表 of my absolute 最喜爱的 words in the entire universe. But first: HAPPY CHRISTMAHANUKWANZA!!!! Most people just say Happy Holidays, but I like to be original. 

1.    Blimo = The mix between a blimp and a limo
2.    Uber = It’s like very, but 更多 epic.
3.    Freaking = it’s like saying ‘fucking’ but 你 don’t get in trouble for saying it.
4.    Epic/Epicness = you’d better know what this means.
5.    Pie = an awesome dessert.
6.    Cheese = I don’t even know why I like saying this, I just do.
7.    Awesome-sauce = okay, so this isn’t my word. It’s still epic.
8.    Schoo = it’s what I call my dog.
9.    Banana = should I even explain this one?
10.    Peoples = Instead of saying ‘people’ I say ‘peoples.’ It just sounds better.
11.    Sirius = this actually started on Fanpop. It’s a reference to Sirius Black in Harry Potter. (Hmm, should I mention Potato also?)
12.    YAY! = YAY!

And now for the 列表 of words that I won’t say:

1.    Gay
2.    Retarded

I HATE it when people use those words as insults. Especially gay. It’s stupid. THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH EITHER OF THESE THINGS. Thank you.
Now I’m going to tell 你 all about the sweet, loving family 圣诞节 story that everyone knows, entitled: “Mom, can I get a new cell phone?”
You’ve all asked it. 你 know it’s true. But this year, my parents ACTUALLY AGREED! I was sooo exited. 你 see, while some of 你 might have an iPhone, 或者 a Blackberry, I have a flip phone. That’s right, a flip phone. My phone is known throughout my ENTIRE SCHOOL as the crappiest phone known to peoples. (See?) My parents and I looked online, and we found the BEST phone EVER. And best of all It was FREE. That’s right, FREE. It was my dream cell phone, and I wouldn’t have to pay a dime for it! I was jumping with excitement. Well, 你 all know what happens in stories like these: the uber (see?) exited girl gets her hoes up, and then SOMETHING comes along and kills the girl’s hopes and dreams, condemning her to live in a sad, new phoneless state for all of eternity. Were 你 guessing that this was going to happen?
你 would be right.
Have 你 ever heard of a phone contract? Well, it’s basically where 你 can only get a free phone every two years. Guess what? I have one. So I can’t get a new phone until May. MAY. *Cries* I DON’T WANNA WAIT UNTIL MAY! I WANT A NEW PHONE NOW!!!!
It didn’t work.
So, I will be the not-so-proud owner of a flip phone until 下一个 May. Five 更多 months, five 更多 months, five 更多 months……
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