1. Sing the 蝙蝠侠 theme incessantly.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with 老友记 in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If 你 have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours 由 hooking a 摄录一体机, 摄像机 to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal 由 conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what 你 think."
17. Claim that 你 must always wear a bicycle 头盔 as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors 你 are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip 皮套 for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying 更多 any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over 由 clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink 盒式磁带, 墨盒 across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler 随意 numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that 你 "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for 随意 times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train 下一个 Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly 你 can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five 分钟 before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints 由 the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of 橙子, 橙色 traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your 晚餐 with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in 随意 spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone 你 meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do 你 hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address 你 as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When 圣诞节 caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, 蝙蝠侠 smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's 老鼠, 鼠标 is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture 由 tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that 你 don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" 或者 the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your 圣诞节 lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra 座位 for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a 诗歌 recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their 答案 in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim 你 can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."
4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with 老友记 in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."
5. If 你 have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
6. Amuse yourself for endless hours 由 hooking a 摄录一体机, 摄像机 to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <
7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.
8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.
9. Start each meal 由 conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub".
10. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 98 copies.
11. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets.
12. Sniffle incessantly.
13. Leave your turn signal on for fifty miles.
14. Name your dog "Dog."
15. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
16. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what 你 think."
17. Claim that 你 must always wear a bicycle 头盔 as part of your "astronaut training."
18. Declare your apartment an independent nation, and sue your neighbors upstairs for "violating your airspace".
19. Forget the punchline to a long joke, but assure the listener it was a "real hoot."
20. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything they touch with Lysol.
21. Practice making fax and modem noises.
22. Highlight irrelevant information in scientific papers and "cc:" them to your boss.
23. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up.
24. Invent nonsense computer jargon in conversations, and see if people play along to avoid the appearance of ignorance.
25. Erect an elaborate network of ropes in your backyard, and tell the neighbors 你 are a "spider person."
26. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with the prophesy."
27. Wear a special hip 皮套 for your
remote control.
28. Do not add any inflection to the end of your sentences, producing awkward silences with the impression that you'll be saying 更多 any moment.
29. Signal that a conversation is over 由 clamping your hands over your ears.
30. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink 盒式磁带, 墨盒 across the room.
31. Give a play-by-play account of a persons every action in a nasal Howard Cosell voice.
32. Holler 随意 numbers while someone is counting.
33. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that 你 "like it that way."
34. Drum on every available surface.
35. Staple papers in the middle of the page.
36. Ask 1-800 operators for dates.
37. Produce a rental video consisting entirely of dire FBI copyright warnings.
38. Sew anti-theft detector strips
into peoples backpacks.
39. Hide dairy products in inaccessible places.
40. Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
41. Set alarms for 随意 times.
42. Order a side of pork rinds with your filet mignon.
43. Instead of Gallo, serve Night Train 下一个 Thanksgiving.
44. Publicly investigate just how slowly 你 can make a "croaking" noise.
45. Honk and wave to strangers.
46. Dress only in clothes colored Hunters Orange.
47. Change channels five 分钟 before the end of every show.
48. Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
49. Wear your pants backwards.
50. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints 由 the cash register.
51. Begin all your sentences with "ooh la la!"
52. ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
53. only type in lowercase.
54. dont use any punctuation either
55. Buy a large quantity of 橙子, 橙色 traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
56. Pay for your 晚餐 with pennies.
57. Tie jingle bells to all your clothes.
58. Repeat everything someone says, as a question.
59. Write "X - BURIED TREASURE" in 随意 spots on all of someone's roadmaps.
60. Inform everyone 你 meet of your personal Kennedy assassination/UFO/ O.J Simpson conspiracy theories.
61. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times: "Do 你 hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, its gone now."
62. Light road flares on a birthday cake.
63. Wander around a restaurant, asking other diners for their parsley.
64. Leave tips in Bolivian currency.
65. Demand that everyone address 你 as "Conquistador."
66. At the laundromat, use one dryer for each of your socks.
67. When 圣诞节 caroling, sing "Jingle Bells, 蝙蝠侠 smells" until physically restrained.
68. Wear a cape that says "Magnificent One."
69. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
70. Stand over someone's shoulder, mumbling, as they read.
71. Pretend your computer's 老鼠, 鼠标 is a CB radio, and talk to it.
72. Try playing the William Tell Overture 由 tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "no, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
73. Drive half a block.
74. Inform others that they exist only in your imagination.
75. Ask people what gender they are.
76. Lick the filling out of all the Oreos, and place the cookie parts back.
77. Cultivate a Norwegian accent. If Norwegian, affect a Southern drawl.
78. Routinely handcuff yourself to furniture, informing the curious that 你 don't want to fall off "in case the big one comes".
79. Deliberately hum songs that will remain lodged in co-workers brains, such as "Feliz Navidad", the Archies "Sugar" 或者 the Mr. Rogers theme song.
80. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head. like a parakeet.
81. Lie obviously about trivial things such as the time of day.
82. Leave your 圣诞节 lights up and lit until September.
83. Change your name to "AaJohn Aaaaasmith" for the great glory of being first in the phone book. Claim it's a Hawaiian name, and demand that people pronounce each "a."
84. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down.
85. Chew on pens that you've borrowed.
86. Wear a LOT of cologne.
87. Listen to 33rpm records at 45rpm speed, and claim the faster speed is necessary because of your "superior mental processing."
88. Sing along at the opera.
89. Mow your lawn with scissors.
90. At a golf tournament, chant "swing-batabatabata-suhWING-batter!"
91. Ask the waitress for an extra 座位 for your "imaginary friend."
92. Go to a 诗歌 recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
93. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions, and then scribble their 答案 in a notebook. Mutter something
about "psychological profiles."
94. Stare at static on the TV and claim 你 can see a "magic picture."
95. Select the same song on the jukebox fifty times.
96. Never make eye contact.
97. Never break eye contact.
98. Construct elaborate "crop circles" in your front lawn.
99. Construct your own pretend "tricorder," and "scan" people with it, announcing the results.
100. Make appointments for the 31st of September.
101. Invite lots of people to other people's parties.
1. read
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying 随意 things until u cry laughing
5. continue 阅读 this
6. Walk up to siblings and say 随意 things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on 脸谱 and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on 谷歌 look up 松鸦, 杰伊, 杰伊 · leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add 随意 people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
2. go outside
3. do ur homework
4. go around the house saying 随意 things until u cry laughing
5. continue 阅读 this
6. Walk up to siblings and say 随意 things until they hit u and then say u r cracking them up
7. play cards
8. dance
9. play checkers
10.read about canadian dudes
11. hit ur siblings, run 2 mommy and say, They hit me!!!!!
12. go on utube
13.talk on phone 4 hrs.
14. go on another fanclub
15. try 2 find me on 脸谱 and figure out im not on, i dnt have an account
16. go on 谷歌 look up 松鸦, 杰伊, 杰伊 · leno, find 15 jokes and have a 13 round comedy c ontest with ur bff
17. write on ur wall
18. write on other peoples walls
19. add 随意 people as ur fans
20. read another forum.
okay, on my 5 completely 随意 things to do...
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as 你 can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as 你 can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend 你 try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
5) sing the alphabet backwards in german while painting a picture of yourself riding a tandem bike
4) clip out something from the newspaper and tape it to your shirt
3) try to do the chicken dance as long as 你 can
2) walk into walmart and ask where the nearest walmart is and directions to it
1) scream "where did i put my flaming green octopus?" as loud as 你 can in a public place (ie. school, mall...bathroom)
i recommend 你 try these. 2 and 1 are my faves.
The 最佳, 返回页首 six reasons computers must be female:
6. As soon as 你 have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command 或者 File Name" is about as informative as
"If 你 don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as 你 make a commitment to one, 你 find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
6. As soon as 你 have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
2. The message "Bad Command 或者 File Name" is about as informative as
"If 你 don't know why I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you".
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
As soon as 你 make a commitment to one, 你 find yourself spending half of your paycheck on accessories for it.
1.everyone around 你 has an attitude problem
2.your adding 浓情巧克力 chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything 你 say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive 你 crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and 你 just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to 冲床 someone without a reason
12.if 你 start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if 你 were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give 你 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so 你 know*
2.your adding 浓情巧克力 chips to your cheese omelet
3.the dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans
4.your husband/boyfriend is suddenly agreeing to everything 你 say
5.your using your cellphone to dial up every bumpersticker that says "hows my driving call 1-800-***-dating"
6.everyone head looks like an invitation to batting practice
7.you're convinced theres a god and he's male
8.you're counting down the days till menopause
9.you're sure everyone is scheming to dive 你 crazy
10.the ibuprofen bottle is empty and 你 just bought it yesterday
11.you just want to 冲床 someone without a reason
12.if 你 start wondering if pms is excuse to get away with murder
13.if 你 were to busy thinking about ways to kill the last person who got on your nerves to realize I was only supposed to give 你 10
a little starotype but funny
*i didn't write this,just so 你 know*
If you’re an animal lover, like me, this story might be to much to take. But I can’t believe people can be so cruel. But I believe that when someone abuses a poor defenseless animal, that someone should be 给 LIFE in prison without the possibility 或者 parole.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet 蟒蛇, python refused to eat it was 给 three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD 展示 Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the 蟒蛇, python in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the 蟒蛇, python failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
A Mesa, Arizona man who killed a 6-week-old kitten after a pet 蟒蛇, python refused to eat it was 给 three years of supervised probation on Friday.
Jeremy Tuffly, 29, pleaded guilty May 11 in Maricopa County Superior Court to one count of cruelty to animals, a Class 6 felony, court records show.
The charge followed after Maricopa County Sheriff's Office deputies learned of a DVD 展示 Tuffly repeatedly throwing the kitten at the 蟒蛇, python in 2002 in an attempt to get the snake to attack it, according to MCSO.
When the 蟒蛇, python failed to eat the kitten, Tuffly kicked it across the yard, authorities previously said. The kitten then died.
1- be always self confident , have some self a steam .
2- be always c00l.
3- turn off ur cellphone during the date...always.
4-be always happy, happy with everything..with ur life.
5- if u really want him as ur bf 或者 date.....try to be cool ,use the words like: yeah totally,or however....try to be little care less about him... ...lol
6- dont be bushy....stay calm and dont complain alot ....jst a little but not alot....
i cant remember anymore so......ill see u the 下一个 time.....thank u all for 阅读 this..and plz 评论 ,have all a gr8 day..peace ^_^
1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."
Like the 标题 says, Does Robert Pattinson die in remember me? My 老友记 说 that he does and I just wanted to know. :):) :)
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