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posted by windwakerguy430
Hello, everyone, and welcome to Whatever Happened To…, where we take a look at gaming's biggest busts, disastrous disappointments, and all of it’s failures, flops, and other alliterations. Games that could’ve been something, only to turn into nothing. And today, we’ll be talking about a little game that shouldn’t even be allowed to exist for reasons we will be getting into on this episode of Whatever Happened To…, and that game, in question, is Too Human.



Too Human was a game created 由 Silicon Knights, a company founded 由 the amazing Denis Dyack, and 由 amazing, I mean he’s one of the worst people in the early years of the gaming industry, with absurd expectations and pisspoor management of his company, what’s not to like about one Denis Dyack, except for everything. Silicon Knights was mostly known, before the creation of Too Human, for their Legacy of Kain game, and game that I have never played, so I have absolutely no idea what any of that is. But we’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk about their OTHER game… 2 Heugh, Man!
So in the glorious 年 of 1999, where it was the turn of the century, with all sorts of new advancements, and everyone thought that The Matrix was the hottest shit around, Denis Dyack announced at this years E3 that they would be working on Too Human, and would have it released on the Playstation. It would be a cybernetic future taking place in 2450 AD, but was eventually changed to a science fiction alternate reality that would be a robotic retelling of Norse mythology. Being a huge game, it would take place on four PS1 discs, 更多 than Final 幻想 VII’s three discs, just to hold all that content. Things were going smoothly, until Silicon Knights and 任天堂 made a deal to produce games for their new console at the time, the Gamecube, in 2000. Because of this, any plans of working on Too Human for the PS游戏机 were out the window. During this time, Silicon Knights worked on two games for the Gamecube, those two being Metal Gear Solid: The Twin Snakes, and Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem, both pretty good games. But there was no other news of Too Human during this time. Nothing but total… silence… That is until five years later.
2005, a 年 of social advancements, the birth of a new age of 音乐 and technology, and the 星, 星级 Wars prequels still proving how garbage they are with the release of Episode III. Finally, after five years of total silence, word of Too Human resurfaced. After the partnership with 任天堂 ended, Silicon Knights proclaimed that it would start to work on Too Human once again, and have the game released on the Xbox 360, Microsoft’s new console at the time, and would use the Unreal Engine 由 Epic Games. The game was planned to actually be a whole trilogy, and would release in the 年 2006. However, another two years would be needed before the game was able to be finished, and so, it continued to work, and required a total of over sixty million dollars to produce. As of the time I wrote this article, Too Human is the seventh most expensive game ever made, just barely being 更多 expensive than both Max Payne 3 and Red Dead Redemption. During the development of the game, Silicon Knights released three short films to support the lore of Too Human, the three films in order being named Excavation, Examination, and Exhibition. After the demo for Too Human was shown off at E3 2008 and then being put on the Xbox Live Marketplace, the demo had over 900,000 downloads, being the fastest downloaded demo at the time. It seems that everything was working out in Silicon Knights favor… So, Whatever Happened to Too Human?
August, 2008. What a goddamn mess of a 年 that was. While America’s economy was going down the shitter, only animated films were really memorable at the time. And just to 最佳, 返回页首 off the garbage 年 of the late two thousands, Too Human was released on August 19th of that year. And in the end, after almost ten years of development, Too Human was released and, like they say in Brooklyn, it was a hot pile of fucking garbage. An uninteresting, boring world to explore, with bland gameplay, busted controls, and also, glitches. Glitches as far as the eye could see. I’ve heard rumors that some people actually couldn’t even play the game because there was a glitch that would destroy the game in the middle portion of it. It must be true because the Wikipedia 文章 for this game only has a barebones 描述 of the main focus of the plot rather than the plot itself. A game this buggy and just 总体, 整体 fucked was supposed to be Silicon Knight’s 马格南, 大酒瓶, 万能 opus? And they wanted 更多 of this. Well, don’t worry, their 马格南, 大酒瓶, 万能 opus would turn out to be the downfall for the entire franchise and perhaps, Silicon Knights themselves. Remember when I 说 Silicon Knights would be using Epic Games’ Unreal Engine. Well, in 2007, due to the poor production of the game, Silicon Knights sued Epic Games for breaching contract and mismanagement of the game, stating that they failed to make a good copy of the game. Because of this, Epic Games counter-sued and, in the 年 2012, the supposed end of the world, Epic Games won the lawsuit and were to receive $4.45 million dollars. Along with that, Silicon Knights were forced to recall and destroy any and all unsold copies of any of their games that used the Unreal Engine. One of those games being Too Human. So, in the end, because of Denis Dyack’s arrogance to make this game perfect, what it only did was kill an entire franchise, waste nine years of the companies time, and in the end, because of this lawsuit, Silicon Knights were forced into bankruptcy and were defunct in 2014. Their biggest game ever, only to bring their downfall. There’s something metta in there, I swear.
100: Spectral Force 3
99: Yoshi’s Topsy-Turvy
98: Ghostbusters: The Video Game
97: Lego Battles
96: Return to 城堡 Wolfenstein
95: Matrix: The Path of Neo
94: Glover
93: Gex 3
92: Pac-Man Party
91: Lord of the Rings: Return of the King: The Video Game
90: Halo 2
89: Army Men: Air Tactics
88: Sonic Generations 3D
87: Saints Row IV
86: Lego 星, 星级 Wars 2: The Original Trilogy
85: Trauma Team
84: Tetris Plus
83: Donkey Kong Jungle Beat
82: Army Men
81: Assassin’s Creed: Black Flag
80: Grand Theft Auto: Vice City
79: The 7th Guest
78: SimCity 2000
77: Resident Evil: Revelations
76: Ultimate Marvel VS Capcom 3
75: Dead...
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Now, there are a lot of games that people praise for good reasons. However, there are times when I look at games and say “People say these games are the best ever made”? Now, don’t get me wrong, I do not hate these games (Well, not all of them, anyway), I just think they get 更多 praise then they deserve. Now, with that said, lets start the list

 Grand Theft Auto V
Grand Theft Auto V


#10: Grand Theft Auto V - Wow. Only number ten and already I am pissing people off. Now, Grand Theft Auto V is a fun game. It has an amazing open world, a great story, a cast of wonderful characters, and addictive gameplay....
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Leonard: I'm a perfectly nice guy. No reason we can't go to a nice 晚餐 together. Have a lovely dinner. Maybe take a nice walk after. She ends up taking me to her apartment (begins having panic attack). We begin kissing.. We're GONNA HAVE SEX! OH GOD! OH GOD!
Sheldon: Is the sex starting already.
Leonard: I'm having panic attack!
Sheldon; Well.. Calm down.
Leonard: I can't calm down. Other wise they wouldn't call it a panic ATTACK!


Leonard: Do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign. Everytime I open my mouth!?


Penny: Your so sweet. Why can't all guys be like you.
Leonard: Cause if all guys were like...
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Guard: (Whistles)
Link: Hey, you, 随意 guard
Guard: Hey, its you....... girl clothed boy
Link: I got something for you
Guard: Oh, is it a Snickers bar
Link: Nope (Cuts guard in half) That's for throwing me in that cell 你 asshole

Link: (At the top) Finally. Here we are.... again
Aryll: Link, your back
Link: Aryll, how have 你 been
Aryll: Oh, well the seagulls have been looking at me constantly, but thanks to this jail cell, they can't really get in to attack me
Seagull: 你 LUCKY BITCH
Link: Well, lets get 你 out of here
Aryll: Um, Link, why is there some pirate hooker behind you
Link: Who (Turns)
Tetra:...
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King of Red Lions: Well, here it is. Dragon Roost Island
Link: I knew that
King of Red Lions: How
Link: Well, the name of the island just materializes on the 最佳, 返回页首 of the screen
King of Red Lions: Oh, well, 你 go ahead and see whats going on
Link: Aren't 你 coming with me
King of Red Lions: I would, but, 你 see, I have things to do, and- Oh right, I'M A FUCKING BOAT
Link: Okay, Mr. Smartass, I'll go look (Walks off)

Link: Wow, its a place filled with bird people. I feel as though, that this must be some sort of alien race
Postman: Link, hello again
Link: Hello... you
Postman: 你 don't recognize me....
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Hello everyone. Now, what are some of the things that make a character unlikable. Are they annoying? Are they jerks? Well, it depends on who they are. But trust me, there are lots of hateable characters in video games. The only 问题 is which ones are the worst. Well, the rules are that there is only one per franchise and only games I've played. Now, here we go
(Warning, this 列表 contains spoilers)

20: Vannile from Final 幻想 13 - Wow. We are actually starting with her? This is going to be a long list. Now, I would have chosen Tidus from Final 幻想 10, but I haven't played that one,...
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(I would like to thank Alinah for informing me of this)
(Warning: This review contains spoilers)
So, um... I was told to review a Pewdiepie playthrough of the Witch's House, even though I told myself that I'm not supposed to review reviewers, and Pewdiepie is technically a reviewer so I can't review this. However, I can review the game itself, The Witch's House. but before I do, I have to make a short statement on Pewdiepie... Pewdiepie's funny, okay, now the review
The Witch's House is a Japanese game that was then translated to English. It is about a gmae where 你 [lay as a young girl named...
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posted by windwakerguy430
January 20, 2:39 a.m.
Wind Waker Guy's Room

Happy Yappy- Wow. So this must be the room where 你 make your shows
Wind Waker Guy- Yep. Anyway, we need to think of what was going on when the mystery man was lurking around the warehouse
Happy Yappy- We could go to the warehouse and try to find some unfound evidence
Wind Waker Guy- I guess it wouldn't hurt to look

January 20
Tetra and Crew Fishing Warehouse

Wind Waker Guy- (Thinking) No matter how many times I come here, I keep wishing I had no nose
Happy Yappy- So, we need to find some evidence that we missed
Wind Waker Guy- Right. Whats this right here...
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posted by windwakerguy430
Remember Afro Samurai? Neither do I. Okay, but seriously, let’s talk about Afro Samurai. Trust me, it is relevant to the game we will be discussing. Afro Samurai was a really dumb, nonsensical video game about a samurai with an afro who searches for his father’s killer and takes out all the 最佳, 返回页首 samurai in the country. It’s a dumb series with large breasted samurai women, everyone has cellphones, and there’s Kanye West bears everywhere, all in feudal Japan. And yet I still liked it. And it must’ve been good enough to get an anime, a movie, and have the main character voiced 由 Samual...
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posted by windwakerguy430
So YIIK was a hipster ridden game that people were very annoyed 由 and against. Well this time, it’s time for us to talk about a game that is hipster ridden that people are quite fond of. To an extent, of course. It does have it’s haters, but this game has far 更多 support than it does hate. And I am referring to the indie adventure title, Night in the Woods. 或者 as many people like to call it, Life is Strange… But Good.

 Image from castingcall.club
Image from castingcall.club


Night in the Woods takes place in the small town of Possum Springs, which has slowly been losing family businesses in place of larger businesses,...
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I 爱情 indie games. Call me a grump, but I just don't see much passion in most video games nowadays. While passion definitely exists thanks to creators like Hideo Kojima, Yoko Taro, Suda51 and many more, big publishers just want to make video games be a quick cash grab, companies like EA, Activision, Bethesda, Square Enix, and Microsoft. But indie developers don't have that kind of desire (Most of the time). All of their games are made on one thing and one thing only: Passion. Their 爱情 for the genre and their desire to tell an interesting narrative 或者 to create something, be it out of a creative...
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added by windwakerguy430
video
the
音乐
posted by windwakerguy430
~8:20 PM
April 2nd 2079
Neon 云, 云计算 Striptease~

Apollo: (He made his way down the street, his katana near his hip, as he made his way down the road. At the end of the 街, 街道 rested a small but fancy building, covered in neon lights. The sign read “The Neon Cloud”. The 街, 街道 was empty, most likely to prepare for the fight that was to come. As Apollo made his way to the club, helicopters began to loom over him, cameramen in sight as they filmed every moment of the fight. Apollo entered the building, 更多 and 更多 camera’s set up around the building, all with the Takedown TV logo on the side....
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added by DisneyPrince88
added by Seanthehedgehog
When 你 hit that play button, 你 are going to listen to the greatest theme song ever created for a TV show.
video
the
音乐
posted by windwakerguy430
Wind: (Sitting at coffee 商店 with Cody) So, 你 think that homosexuals come from space
Cody: Well, how else do people just… become gay
Wind: Thinking it through mentally, maybe
Cody: Nah, that’s silly
(A large protest group walks down the street)
Cody: What’s that?
Wind: A protest, it seems. Let’s see if the cops start to beat them up (Heads out, and Cody follows)

Arnold: We can’t let this racism keep going
Wind: (Passes through the crowd) Get out of my way (Gets to the front of the crowd) Excuse me, but what the hell are 你 talking about
Arnold: Do 你 not see the racism around us. Blacks,...
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posted by windwakerguy430
~Story~

Bishop, Rollen “Roll”, and Tiny Tom are all video game making novices, all wanting to make it big in the gaming industry. However, they lack any skill in creating a game. So, they decide to head to a place known as Glass Sky Hills, where they hope to meet a man known as The Prodigy, who has created several amazing games. When they find The Prodigy, they find him to be a high schooler just like them, named Maximilian, with his alias name being Max 1. Million, but asks the others to call him Maxwell. His 爱情 for gaming completely blocks out his 爱情 for other things, including people,...
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