暮光之城系列 Article: Funny Twilight Quotes! :D

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posted by Renesmee_08

1) I was pale before Twilight made it cool.

2) I drive like a Cullen.

3) Jacob could BEAST f*ck me ANYTIME!!!

4) Looks at Edward...Damn he's hot, Jacob walks up...Edward who?

5) Does someone need a Jasper hug?

6) When Emmett Cullen does pushups, he doesn't push himself up; he pushes the ground down.

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Blondes may have 更多 fun, but Edward prefers Brunettes.

8) "You're pale white...and ice cold...I know what 你 are" "Say it... Out loud." "A SNOWMAN!"

9) Having a pulse? ... So overrated.

10) "Are 你 afraid?" "No." "Then let's dance!"

11) Emmett: I have to get 首页 for the game. Alice: They lose. Emmett: F*** 你 Alice! F*** YOU!

12) This may hurt just a little. *Jane squeezes Bella's wrist.*

13) "And so the hienna fell in 爱情 with the pop tart."

14) Edward makes Peeping Toms sexy.

15) Dear Jacob: I win. Sincerely, Edward.

16) Note to everyone: go to Alice's parties 或者 she will kidnapp 你 and force 你 to go!

17) Edward can BUST my headboard, BITE my pillows, and BRUISE my body ANYDAY!

18) Do that again, and I will so give 你 a papercut in front of Jasper.

19) It’s all fun and games until someone gets a papercut!

20) Give blood- 日期 a Cullen.

21) Forks: where sparkly men tell 你 that 你 smell delicious.

22) It’s thundery, which can only mean one thing. Speed dial my hunting team! We’re searching every field in a five mile radius!

23) If an 苹果 a 日 keeps the doctor away....SCREW APPLES! I WANNA SEE DR.CULLEN!

24) 你 don’t like Twilight? That’s okay. It’s ok if I stick your head in a blender as well, right?

25) I’m sorry, did 你 say something? It didn’t sound Twilight related, so I wasn’t paying attention.

26) Well they do say diamonds are a girl’s best friend, and 狗 are mans’ best friend!

27) My room is Edward-proof. Freshly greased window so it won’t stick, brand new pillows and high central heating. I even have that rocking chair he loves...

28) Who needs a boyfriend? We have Twilight.

29) I so don’t understand this whole ‘Edward 或者 Jacob. Who’s hotter?’ thing. I mean we all know the real 问题 is Jasper 或者 Emmett. Who’s colder and sexier?

30) 玫瑰 are red. Violets are blue. I 爱情 Twilight. So should you.

31) Screw Santa, I want Edward Cullen to come down my chimney!

32) Eat->Sleep->Read Twilight->Watch Twilight->Repeat.

33)I wonder if Edward and his family knew when Bella was on her period? Hmm... pretty embarrassing...

34) Some find Edward Cullen romantic. However, if he looked his actual age, would 你 think it romantic for an old, haggard, 110 年 old man to be sneaking into an 18 年 old girl's room to watch her sleep?

35) I can live without food, but I can’t do without my daily dose of Twilight.

36) Who needs a life? I have Twilight.

37) I'm not sleeping till I get a piggy back from Emmett!

38) Loreal Jasper- Because you're worth it

39) When Life Gives 你 Lemons, THROW THEM BACK AND DEMAND FOR EDWARD CULLEN!!!

40) If i get sick take me to Dr Cullen

41) Edward Cullen: The Other White Meat

42) Keep Calm and 爱情 Twilight

43) Oh Hale No!

44) I didn't get my letter to Hogwarts, so I'm moving to Forks instead.

45) Forget a knight in shining armor, I want a vampire in shiny Volvo!

46) Team Edward, except when Jacob is shirtless...

47) Unconditionally and irrevocably Twilight obsessed.

mr-cullen, BloodyObsession and 1 other like this

Elle-C This was truly hilarious -- thanks for posting!

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Alice's New Moon Chapter 18

posted by just_bella

Ok I had the whole thing typed and my 奇瓦瓦, 奇瓦瓦州 walked across the keyboard and closed the window...so now I get to type it all again!! DANG IT!! OK well here we go AGAIN!! :)

End of Part 17
I went back to the couch, hearing Bella follow behind me. I reached my hand out to her and pulled her close to me.

"You look tired." I 说 as I examined her face.

"Yeah, near-death experiences do that to me...So, what does Carlisle think of 你 being here?" She asked, probing for information.

"He doesn't know. He and Esme were on a hunting trip when I left. I'll hear from him in a few days when he gets back."...

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The story never ends, it’s a happily ever after - Part 27

posted by sasie_katje88

Last one for today :D it's getting to heartbreaking after this 文章 and I want to keep it all together :( enjoy 阅读 it

Bella's pov

After 50 分钟 the first break started. I walked out of science class with my bag on my shoulder, my 图书 in one hand and Mason’s hand in the other. Cedriq followed us closely.
“Mommie that was awesome. I wanna be a science teacher when I grow up” Mason 说 with allot of joy in his voice. It made me smile to see him like that. I let go of his hand and he started running in the hallway.
“Mason no running” I yelled strong to him. I walked gently towards...

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The story never ends, it’s a happily ever after - Part 22

posted by sasie_katje88

Bella's pov

4 Months has passed again and I’m feeling really great. Edward and me went back to Darmouth to finish my last 年 of evening courses. It felt so good to be just a vampire now instead of a vampire and a witch.
Nobody has been chasing me 或者 even wanted to kill me. I just hope it will stay that way because like Edward always 说 ‘Bella, 你 are a danger magnet’.
Edward never left my side, not a single time. I always laughed when were at school and I had to go the ladies room, he always went with me and waited outside the door. I never mind that he went everywhere with me, it made...

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Kayla's Secret, Chapter 22

posted by twilight-7

Five days later – Edward’s POV

No one could find her. No one. I tried to. I followed her scent right out to the side entrance. I had found her graduation 长袍 there. So her kidnapper had definitely taken her that way. But her scent wasn’t outside any farther than the door. It was just her 长袍 dumped there. It was like she had vanished off the face of the Earth.
Mitchell couldn’t trace her. He had been able to trace Charlie because of Charlie’s abilities and when Charlie gave up his abilities he couldn’t find him. When Mitchell tried to trace Kayla he came up a blank. Mitchell said...

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The story never ends, it’s a happily ever after - Part 21

posted by sasie_katje88

héhé, No it's not HP ... it would be awkward because i don't think they use the bedroom door and that without being seen 由 the Cullen's :D this is a request to put 更多 Renesmee and jake in the story. I'm planning to write these stories in nessie's pov too, just don't know when to start yet :-)

Bella's pov

Alice was standing in the doorway with Renesmee and jake behind her.
“Nessie want to talk to Bella” Alice 说 slowly
“Bella needs to rest, can’t anyone respect that, come back later when she’s feeling better” Edward 说 angry and annoyed.
“EDWARD” I 说 a little louder. “If...

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Dreamnapped- Chapter 6 Newborns (Keith's P.O.V.)

posted by Twilight597

this one is really short so i promise to have the 下一个 one up 由 tomorrow..i promise...this one goes to vampirelover17 because she 评论 first last chapter...here u go! plz plz R/R plz it would make my 日 and u will make u the dedicater person thingy! lolz just R/R plz plz thanks soooo mush for the support if u 爱情 my story

Chapter 6 Newborns (Keith’s P.O.V.)

I found something for Bella to eat, put it in the microwave, and told her it is for her.

She said, “Thanks, goodnight.”

I walked into my study and thought about what she 说 about wanting to be turned. Should I, 或者 should I...

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The story never ends, it’s a happily ever after - Part 14

posted by sasie_katje88

Bella's pov

I woke up again and I was still on the bed. I started to look around and I didn’t see him anywhere.
I slowly got out of 床, 床上 and walked around. Where is he? Is he gone. I couldn’t hear anything. I gently walked thru the living room and noticed I’ve past out for 2 days again. I looked around the room again when I heard the front door, I grabbed a vase and walked gently toward the door, it opened and I jumped.
“Alice” I whispered “I could have hit 你 with the vase”
“Lucky 你 stopped in time” she 说 amused. I looked over her shoulder and the rest of the Cullen’s...

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Alice's New Moon Chapter 11

posted by just_bella

Ok I wasn't going to write anymore but I really wasn't happy with the last chapter. So I decided to try again :)

End of Chapter 10

I don't know how much time passed, no one 说 anything. Jasper continued to hold me, occasionally running his hands through my hair. I kept looking into the future, hoping that Edward would change his mind, maybe Carlisle would talk to him. No matter how much I looked everything stayed the same.

I had stopped looking, the pain cutting me in half, I couldn't handle it anymore. I decided to sit up and try to figure out where we were, and much to my surprise we were...

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Dusk-Edward Cullen

posted by VampirePrinsess

I sat on the plane, reflecting as I watched the world rush 由 below, so much smaller than it seemed when 你 were down there, part of it.
Three years ago, I'd just been visiting 欧洲 with my mom, Renee; she wanted to "see the sights" before she married Phil and settled down. We'd not been there long, maybe a few days, when it happened. It was dark, and we'd gone out to see the city - I could never remember where, exactly - at night... It'd been the last thing we'd done together. All I could clearly remember from that night was the fear, the terror, the screaming... the pain. I shuddered away...

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Chapter 20: "Who Needs a Werewolf for a Boyfriend When 你 Have a Vampire for a Best Friend...?

posted by lovethecullens

Chapter 20: “Who Needs A Werewolf for a Boyfriend When 你 Have a Vampire for a Best Friend…?

“Please turn to page 31 in your textbook,” Mr. Banner droned on, I couldn’t pay attention to another boring lecture. Although I had to absorb myself in something otherwise Nessie would give me that concerned look again. I really hated being the 来源 of everyone’s concern especially when they were putting themselves in such grave danger to keep me safe. “I am going to go get the video that we will be watching today, so starting 阅读 this chapter and make sure that 你 all behave while...

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When 你 feel like burning; A Jacob 'fairytale' [Sixth Chapter]

posted by shellycane

Warning: This is just my 幻想 coming through. And some information to you; the story plays before Bella became a Vampire and there is no Nessie in sight. So its just for our little Jacob's sake, he needs some luving.

A new kind of Life...
Again i woke up to that awful smell, it burnt in my nose and made me shiver. It had been a weird week, and i still wasnt used to my life the way it was right now. I had moved into the Cullen house, not having any other place to go anyhow. LaPush was a no go, Sam had all the ways to make me stay away from Kristine.- but so far he didnt try. Then again i hadnt...

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Dusk Chapter 9: Father Knows Best (Edward's P.O.V.)

posted by lovethecullens

Chapter 9 Father Knows Best (Edward’s P.O.V.)

“Bella do 你 really think that we should interfere?” I certainly wanted to intercede but I had my doubts as to what my daughter would think of our little road trip to La Push. “Edward, we are going. I am not going to watch Renesmee in pain any longer.” Bella sounded determined as she stared straight ahead. “I thought that 你 didn’t want them together and that 你 wanted her to have options.” I reminded the 爱情 of my life as gently as I could. She snarled sarcasitcally, “Well it seems like options are doing her a lot of good right...

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The story never ends, it’s just beginning - Part 17

posted by sasie_katje88

these are going to be WITCHY :D LOL, hope you're up to it :d

Bella's pov

Edward came to me and grabbed my hand and 说 to me in a calm voice
“come on let’s go inside, he’s gone”. I nodded, I knew I had to tell the story on my own I’m just so afraid of how they will react when I’m done telling.

We walked inside the house and I went straight to Mason’s 婴儿床 I picked him up and grabbed him tight to me and I walked toward the 长椅, 沙发 and sat down. I looked up and everyone was just frozen, like statues.
“You all should sit down, if 你 want me to tell the story” I 说 still calm but...

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When 你 feel like burning; A Jacob 'fairytale' [Fourth Chapter]

posted by shellycane

Warning: Thist is just my 幻想 coming through. And some information to you; the story plays before Bella became a Vampire and there is no Nessie in sight. So its just for our little Jacob's sake, he needs some luving.

Lady luck played her last ace...
I knew i was doing the right thing, whenever i had a chance to look in her beautiful green eyes. It was the only possible way to be happy with her, before things started to become complicated. So no matter what would happen from now on, i knew at least that there was something like happines for someone like me. I had spent two weeks with her,...

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Dusk Chapter 4: Jacob's Suicide Mission... (lol) (From Jacob's P.O.V)

posted by lovethecullens

Chapter 4: Jacob’s Suicide Mission…(lol) (From Jacob’s POV)

As I walked up to the front door, I felt oddly nervous. If it were 6 years 以前 I would not have been comfortable walking up to a house owned 由 a vampire unless it involved me ripping them to pieces, but 嘿 things change. Edward and I have actually gotten close since I stood with him and his family to protect Renesmee from the Volturi, we are on friendly terms; that along with the fact that both he and Bella know that I have imprinted on Renesmee. Yet, this knowledge did nothing to ease the nervousness I felt as I contemplated...

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The story never ends, it’s just beginning - Part 2

posted by sasie_katje88

it's a short one this time, but i'll promise the 下一个 one will be bigger :D I'm 写作 in bella's pov because it's hard for me to put myself in a boy's mind, maybe i'll try it later :D

Bella's Pov

I was laying in his hands, listening to the birds who where enjoying the warm and sunny weather. I felt Edward’s warm voice to my ear and he 说 with a little laughter:
“We should get dressed, if 你 still want to study”
“I growled, I don’t wanna study anymore” I said
But Edward already dragged me out of bed, We started to get dressed, me in blue jeans and a black 最佳, 返回页首 and Edward in blue jeans...

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The story never ends, it’s just beginning - Part 1

posted by sasie_katje88

It’s my first time I’m 写作 a story, so I hope 你 like it, sorry for the mistakes I’m not that good in English :D Please leave comments, if the 评论 are good, I’ll put the rest of the story up too :D

Bella’s pov

Months has passed now since Renesmee was born and I was turned into a vampire 由 my beloved husband Edward. It all feels so strange, like it all happened yesterday, maybe it’s because the days are a lot longer now from since I was human. As a human I needed sleep but now I don’t need to sleep anymore. I don’t regret any of it, I can spend 更多 time with Renesmee,...

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Chapter 3: A Little Bribe Can Go A Long Way

posted by lovethecullens

Chapter 3: A Little Bribe Can Go A Long Way

I woke up groggily and as soon as I remembered that it as September 8th, the first 日 of…school… (shudder) I pulled the covers back over my head and rolled over. I felt my mother sit down 下一个 to me and gently pull them back. Her topaz eyes were narrowed a bit in concern, “Renesmee, come on get up, it’s going to be alright, 你 will see.” I didn’t have the energy to argue anymore, and I hated seeing my mother look so upset. I really dislike upsetting her I constantly fight feelings of guilt because I killed her. When I was born I killed...

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When 你 feel like burning; A Jacob 'fairytale' [First Chapter]

posted by shellycane

Warning: Thist is just my 幻想 coming through. And some information to you; the story plays before Bella became a Vampire and there is no Nessie in sight. So its just for out little Jacob's sake, he needs some luving.

Even when your 心 breaks...
I had to get over it, i kept telling that to myself, but 爱情 was such a cruel monster. Bella Swan. She was what i wanted, and yet the only thing that i couldnt get. Since she came into my life, all the other girls became grey and blurry. Everyone around thought i had 迷失 my mind, and i couldnt blame them. I couldnt sleep, i only ate cause my...

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The Other Way (Edward's POV) Ch. 4

posted by CharmedVamp101

I watched her come out of the room where she spent the last week getting better. She walked over to where I stood, waiting to take her to her apartment. I thought about how much Bella had meant to me, how much she had changed me. I thought about how easy it was to forget her now that my existence finally had a true meaning. I remember how I used to think that Bella was the whole point of my existence, how she was what kept me alive, but I now knew that she was just to help me control myself for the only true 爱情 I could have. I saw through Sam's mind how Emily was his whole world. I knew...