Edward: Happy Birthday, Bella.
Bella: Screw my birthday, I don’t wanna grow up!
Edward: You’re like Peter Pan, except you’re a girl!
Bella: About that…
Edward: What?
Bella: Nothing.
Edward: Let’s go to my place.
Bella: Giving in? The perfect present…
Edward: Hell no! 你 think I’m weak?! WELL I’LL 显示 你 WEAK! –Bends down to Bella’s neck-
Bella: Edward, wait for Victoria to kill me. She has 更多 practice.
Edward: Let’s go inside!
Alice: Surprise! Big huge party to be celebrated 由 only 8 people! WOO!
Bella: I totally didn’t see this coming…
Esme: I baked 你 this wonderful cake! Since 你 are the only edible thing for the seven of us, you’ll just have to eat this yourself! And then we get to watch 你 grow as fat as Jessica! Isn’t that super? –Twitches-
Bella: …
Alice: Er… present time!
Bella: Thanks for the box of nothing, I deserve it. –Sobs-
Alice: God, you’ve never been so bipolar. IT’S A STEREO! CAN’T 你 TAKE A JOKE?! –Foams from mouth-
Bella: That was awkward.
Jasper: Cut the pain away!
Edward: What the hell Jasper?
Jasper: It helps me, even though no blade could even mark my skin. Rosalie’s fingernails sure are strong…
Cullens: …
Jasper: But seriously, Bella, cut the pain away. If 你 do it while I’m around, I’ll have the perfect excuse to jump you.
Bella: Being the non-selfish person I am, I’ll try that. Give me the 下一个 present.
Esme: 首页 DEPOT!
Bella: Okay then… -gets paper cut-
Jasper: Can I eat 你 now?
Bella: Edward?
Edward: Nah. Not yet. Give me that piece of glass over there, please?
Bella: -Hands Edward glass-
Edward: Thanks. –Draws line with glass from elbow to hand on Bella-
Bella: What the hell, Edward!
Edward: Just taking Jasper’s advice…
Jasper: No one understands me! -Sobs in corner-
-The 下一个 day-
Edward: Go into the forest while I forge your signature.
Bella: …
Edward: Do it before I rape you!
Bella: 你 already used that one on me in the last parody.
Edward: Fine. Uh… before I bring Jasper over to get all 情绪硬核 on you?
Bella: A little better. Work harder on your threats, though.
Edward: Go before I bring Oprah into this!
Bella: Aw, that was weak. I’m going, though.
-In the forest-
Edward: Bella, I’m leaving you.
Bella: No! Who will save me from my abusive father?
Edward: Paris Hilton. They don’t just teach 你 how to get off crack in rehab.
Bella: She doesn’t look like a Paris to me. I think her name should be Samantha.
Edward: Back to the point…
Bella: Which was?
Edward: I’m leaving.
Bella: Why?
Edward: You’ll find out later in the book.
Bella: …
Edward: Bye!
Bella: NOOOO!! -Has mental and emotional breakdown-
-4 months later-
Bella: Oooh, motorcycles. It’s like the hot wheels version of a bike. I’ll just go take them since they look 更多 like computer chairs with headlights right now. –drives to Jacob’s-
Bella: Fix these bikes and I’ll pretend to like you.
Jacob: I’m hopeless, have no future, and am to stupid to recognize my family history, let’s go!
-In garage-
Jacob: 你 can sit in this piece of crap I call a car.
Bella: I feel special.
-At motorcycle riding place-
Bella: I hear Edward’s voice in my head.
Jacob: That doesn’t make 你 crazy at all!
Bella: He talks to me when I do dangerous things.
Jacob: Nope, no therapy needed…
Bella: I’m just… gonna go now…
Jacob: -Just stands there, talking to no one- nope, of course not! Hearing voices in your head? Definitely not insane! Completely normal!
No one: My parents really hate me to give me this name.
Jacob: At least your name isn’t ‘anybody.’ (A/N 你 would have to read my story ‘aim with the Cullens’ to really get this)
No one: I still think no one is worse.
Jacob: Screw you; we’re supposed to be talking about MY problems here!
No one: I thought we were talking about Bella’s.
Jacob: -Throws No one over a cliff- Back to my rambling…
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: 嘿 Jacob, a guy asked me out on a sort-of group 日期 and I don’t want to be alone even though there will be like 10 other people there. Wanna go with me?
Jacob: I have no social life of my own. Sure, why not?
-Movies at Port Angeles-
Mike: I feel sick.
Jacob: Shut up! Can’t 你 see I’m not watching the movie?!
Mike: -Runs to bathroom-
Jacob: Hahaha. GAY!
Bella: God, Jacob, you’re such a hypocrite about you’re orientation.
Jacob: True dat. Watching Mike pour his insides into the toilet through his mouth actually kind of turns me on.
Bella: …
Jacob: Let’s go home.
-At Bella’s house-
Jacob: I feel odd.
Bella: 你 look odd.
Jacob: That was a really gay comeback.
Bella: Shut up, asshole!
Jacob: I’m going 首页 before I explode into an oversized dog. Bye!
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: -Calls Jacob-
Billy: 嘿 Bella.
Bella: Where the hell is Jacob?
Billy: God, Bella. Don’t go all bipolar on me. He uh… can’t talk right now.
Bella: Why does everyone keep telling me I’m bipolar?! And why can’t he?
Billy: Because he just turned into a mythical creature and will probably kill 你 if he see’s you.
Bella: …
Billy: I mean… just kidding?
Bella: Is Jacob a vampire?
Billy: …No! –Hangs up-
-One 月 later-
Bella: Jacob, I’m just going to stalk 你 until 你 talk to me!
Jacob: We’re not 老友记 anymore, so fuck off!
-Later that night-
Jacob: Open the damn window!
Bella: Stalker…
Jacob: There’s a reason we can’t be friends.
Bella: Which is?
Jacob: -Dramatic pause- I’m a werewolf!
Bella: Oh no!
Mike: Oh no!
Charlie: Oh no!
-Koolaid man bursts through wall-
Koolaid man: OH YEAH!
Everyone: …
Koolaid man: -Backs out of wall- (A/n I was watching Family Guy last night and I couldn’t resist putting that up there)
Bella: Could you, like, NOT eat people?
Jacob: What the hell Bella?! Do 你 think I’m a cannibal?!
Bella: Yes.
Jacob: …
Bella: I regret nothing.
-Valentines Day-
Jacob: I got 你 a box of 糖果 hearts because I pity that 你 don’t have anyone to care for you.
Bella: These hearts taste like the chalk 你 use to draw on the sidewalk.
Jacob: I’m a REALLY good at sculpting things.
Bella: So I’m eating…
Jacob: Yes, Bella. 你 are eating 心 shaped chalk.
Bella: I want more!
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: I’m gonna go cliff diving to hear Edward’s voice!
Guy in passing car: Don’t jump! It’s not worth it! (A/N that actually happened to me once, me and my 老友记 were on this bridge and my friend was looking over the edge and a guy passed 由 in a car and 说 “don’t jump!” anyways, back to the story)
Bella: -Shrugs- This’ll probably kill me, here goes nothing! -Jumps-
Edward’s voice: Swim like you’re immortal!
Bella: -Passes out-
-At Jacob’s house-
Jacob: Harry Clearwater died.
Bella: Finally…
-At Bella’s house-
Jacob: Vampire!
Bella: Woo!
Jacob: Oh, HELL no! I’ve picked up your pieces and you’re just going to go right back to them?
Bella: Yeah…
Jacob: Just makin’ sure. See ya Bells!
Bella: -walks inside-
Alice: Bella?
Bella: Alice!
Alice: Bella!
Mike: Mike!
Bella: How are 你 still lonely?! Go find Jessica 或者 something! Can’t 你 see we were having a moment?
Mike: Jessica still looks like a pregnant Chris Crocker.
Alice: …
Mike: -Sulks- Fine. 或者 maybe I’ll just go hang out with Anybody… (A/N Again, read AIM story to understand)
Alice: Why are 你 still alive?
Bella: Why are you?! 你 were supposed to die like 80 years ago!
Alice: Ouch… that was cold, Bella.
Bella: I regret nothing!
Alice: Well, anyways, Edward’s about to die and we have to go save him.
Bella: Cool, where are we going?
Alice: Italy.
Bella: Sweet, road trip!
-In Italy-
Alice: Run, fat boy, run!
Bella: -trips, hyperventilates, sweats-
Edward: I’m in hell! It owns.
Bella: Not yet. 你 will be soon, though, I’m sure of it.
Edward: Nice to see 你 too.
Felix: Die, die, die!
Bella: um… ahh??
Felix: Be afraid, be VERY afraid…
Edward: 糖果 Mountain, here we come!
-In vampire city… thing…-
Aro: 嘿 girl!
Bella: Edward, 你 never told me Aro was gay.
Edward: There are a lot of things I didn’t tell you.
Aro: So, Edward, Who’s the lucky lady? -Winks-
Edward: I don’t feel comfortable about this…
Bella: I’m Bella.
Aro: Nice to meet you, Bella. I have to say, I’m jealous. No one could ever live up to someone as godly as him.
Bella: Finally, someone I can relate to!
Edward: Okay, ew. Are 你 gonna kill us 或者 not?
Aro: That depends.
Edward: On?
Aro: On.
Edward: On…
Aro: On!
Edward: Dammit, Aro! Are 你 going to slaughter us 或者 what?!
Aro: That depends…
Edward: Go on with it.
Aro: On if you’ll bite her.
Edward: Hell no! An eternity with… her?! -Shudders-
Aro: If 你 don’t I’ll kill you’re family.
Edward: One 日 I’ll do it… eventually…
Aro: Fabulous. Oh, And Edward? Come back any time 你 want. –winks and giggles-
Edward: Um… no. –Picks up Bella like a football and runs-
-At Bella’s house-
Bella: Don’t leave me again! I still 爱情 you!
Edward: And 你 still smell good!
Bella: I never want 你 to leave again!
Edward: Never say never, Bella!
Bella: What are you, Barney? And 你 just 说 it twice…
Edward: Well piss off! I didn’t want you, anyway!
Bella: You’ll stay though, right?
Edward: I guess. I mean, I have no where else to live.
Bella: Score!
Edward: Don’t push it.
Bella: So are 你 really gonna change me?
Edward: Probably not.
Bella: Screw you. I’ll ask the others.
-At Cullen House-
Bella: Want me to become a vampire?
Rosalie: I’d kill myself before that happened.
Bella: It’s not even possible for 你 to kill yourself...
Rosalie: Shut up, bitch!
Bella: What are everyone else’s opinions on this?
Emmett: Dah… four? -Drools-
Esme: 首页 DEPOT!
Bella: Anymore fanfiction stereotypical answers?
Alice: SHOOPPING!
Jasper: Emo! EEEEMOOOO!! Cut the pain away! -runs to corner and cries while cutting wrists-
Bella: What about Carlisle?
Carlisle: I don’t really have a stereotype.
Bella: Oh.
Carlisle: So are we changing you?
Edward: No! We didn’t even get any real answers!
Bella: I know. But we are going to do what I want. I mean, I am the guest.
Edward: Screw it all, I’m going to Canada.
Bella: No! We have school tomorrow!
Edward: Oh yeah… Let’s go back to Charlie.
-At Charlie’s house-
Jacob: 嘿 Bella, I’m baaaaack… 逼债, 墩 逼债, 墩 DUN!
Bella: Oh no!
Edward: Oh no!
Charlie: Oh no!
Koolaid man: Oh yeah!
Edward: Oh my god, NO! 你 can only do that on Tuesdays!
Koolaid man: No one told ME that…
No one: I 说 no such thing!
Jacob: I thought I killed you!
Edward: -slaps forehead- just… get out of here…
Koolaid man: -walks away shamefully with no one-
Jacob: Ahem… Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. I’M BACK! MUAHAHAHA!
Bella: Why?
Jacob: What?
Bella: Why? Why are 你 back?
Jacob: Oh… um. I told Charlie about the motorcycles.
Bella: That sucks.
Jacob: It should.
Charlie: BELLA! GET IN HERE BEFORE I TAKE AWAY MR. FEELINGS!
Jacob: Mr. Feelings? What the hell?
Bella: He’s the only one that listens to me. He’s my best friend.
Jacob: Um.
Edward: Yeah. Um.
Bella: I have a lot of free time.
Edward: I’ve noticed.
Bella: Well, I’m gonna go now. See 你 guys later.
Jacob: No! That’s not supposed to happen! I’m supposed to go off, then Edward is supposed to comfort you.
Bella: Oh. Okay.
Jacob: I think this is my cue to leave. –Runs-
Bella: Oh, no! What did I do?!
Edward: I don’t know. What DID 你 do?
Bella: No! You’re supposed to hug me and tell me everything is going to be alright!
Edward: Oh. It’ll be alright… -Hugs Bella awkwardly-
Bella: I feel all better now! Let’s go play Hide and Seek in the Meadow.
Bella: Screw my birthday, I don’t wanna grow up!
Edward: You’re like Peter Pan, except you’re a girl!
Bella: About that…
Edward: What?
Bella: Nothing.
Edward: Let’s go to my place.
Bella: Giving in? The perfect present…
Edward: Hell no! 你 think I’m weak?! WELL I’LL 显示 你 WEAK! –Bends down to Bella’s neck-
Bella: Edward, wait for Victoria to kill me. She has 更多 practice.
Edward: Let’s go inside!
Alice: Surprise! Big huge party to be celebrated 由 only 8 people! WOO!
Bella: I totally didn’t see this coming…
Esme: I baked 你 this wonderful cake! Since 你 are the only edible thing for the seven of us, you’ll just have to eat this yourself! And then we get to watch 你 grow as fat as Jessica! Isn’t that super? –Twitches-
Bella: …
Alice: Er… present time!
Bella: Thanks for the box of nothing, I deserve it. –Sobs-
Alice: God, you’ve never been so bipolar. IT’S A STEREO! CAN’T 你 TAKE A JOKE?! –Foams from mouth-
Bella: That was awkward.
Jasper: Cut the pain away!
Edward: What the hell Jasper?
Jasper: It helps me, even though no blade could even mark my skin. Rosalie’s fingernails sure are strong…
Cullens: …
Jasper: But seriously, Bella, cut the pain away. If 你 do it while I’m around, I’ll have the perfect excuse to jump you.
Bella: Being the non-selfish person I am, I’ll try that. Give me the 下一个 present.
Esme: 首页 DEPOT!
Bella: Okay then… -gets paper cut-
Jasper: Can I eat 你 now?
Bella: Edward?
Edward: Nah. Not yet. Give me that piece of glass over there, please?
Bella: -Hands Edward glass-
Edward: Thanks. –Draws line with glass from elbow to hand on Bella-
Bella: What the hell, Edward!
Edward: Just taking Jasper’s advice…
Jasper: No one understands me! -Sobs in corner-
-The 下一个 day-
Edward: Go into the forest while I forge your signature.
Bella: …
Edward: Do it before I rape you!
Bella: 你 already used that one on me in the last parody.
Edward: Fine. Uh… before I bring Jasper over to get all 情绪硬核 on you?
Bella: A little better. Work harder on your threats, though.
Edward: Go before I bring Oprah into this!
Bella: Aw, that was weak. I’m going, though.
-In the forest-
Edward: Bella, I’m leaving you.
Bella: No! Who will save me from my abusive father?
Edward: Paris Hilton. They don’t just teach 你 how to get off crack in rehab.
Bella: She doesn’t look like a Paris to me. I think her name should be Samantha.
Edward: Back to the point…
Bella: Which was?
Edward: I’m leaving.
Bella: Why?
Edward: You’ll find out later in the book.
Bella: …
Edward: Bye!
Bella: NOOOO!! -Has mental and emotional breakdown-
-4 months later-
Bella: Oooh, motorcycles. It’s like the hot wheels version of a bike. I’ll just go take them since they look 更多 like computer chairs with headlights right now. –drives to Jacob’s-
Bella: Fix these bikes and I’ll pretend to like you.
Jacob: I’m hopeless, have no future, and am to stupid to recognize my family history, let’s go!
-In garage-
Jacob: 你 can sit in this piece of crap I call a car.
Bella: I feel special.
-At motorcycle riding place-
Bella: I hear Edward’s voice in my head.
Jacob: That doesn’t make 你 crazy at all!
Bella: He talks to me when I do dangerous things.
Jacob: Nope, no therapy needed…
Bella: I’m just… gonna go now…
Jacob: -Just stands there, talking to no one- nope, of course not! Hearing voices in your head? Definitely not insane! Completely normal!
No one: My parents really hate me to give me this name.
Jacob: At least your name isn’t ‘anybody.’ (A/N 你 would have to read my story ‘aim with the Cullens’ to really get this)
No one: I still think no one is worse.
Jacob: Screw you; we’re supposed to be talking about MY problems here!
No one: I thought we were talking about Bella’s.
Jacob: -Throws No one over a cliff- Back to my rambling…
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: 嘿 Jacob, a guy asked me out on a sort-of group 日期 and I don’t want to be alone even though there will be like 10 other people there. Wanna go with me?
Jacob: I have no social life of my own. Sure, why not?
-Movies at Port Angeles-
Mike: I feel sick.
Jacob: Shut up! Can’t 你 see I’m not watching the movie?!
Mike: -Runs to bathroom-
Jacob: Hahaha. GAY!
Bella: God, Jacob, you’re such a hypocrite about you’re orientation.
Jacob: True dat. Watching Mike pour his insides into the toilet through his mouth actually kind of turns me on.
Bella: …
Jacob: Let’s go home.
-At Bella’s house-
Jacob: I feel odd.
Bella: 你 look odd.
Jacob: That was a really gay comeback.
Bella: Shut up, asshole!
Jacob: I’m going 首页 before I explode into an oversized dog. Bye!
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: -Calls Jacob-
Billy: 嘿 Bella.
Bella: Where the hell is Jacob?
Billy: God, Bella. Don’t go all bipolar on me. He uh… can’t talk right now.
Bella: Why does everyone keep telling me I’m bipolar?! And why can’t he?
Billy: Because he just turned into a mythical creature and will probably kill 你 if he see’s you.
Bella: …
Billy: I mean… just kidding?
Bella: Is Jacob a vampire?
Billy: …No! –Hangs up-
-One 月 later-
Bella: Jacob, I’m just going to stalk 你 until 你 talk to me!
Jacob: We’re not 老友记 anymore, so fuck off!
-Later that night-
Jacob: Open the damn window!
Bella: Stalker…
Jacob: There’s a reason we can’t be friends.
Bella: Which is?
Jacob: -Dramatic pause- I’m a werewolf!
Bella: Oh no!
Mike: Oh no!
Charlie: Oh no!
-Koolaid man bursts through wall-
Koolaid man: OH YEAH!
Everyone: …
Koolaid man: -Backs out of wall- (A/n I was watching Family Guy last night and I couldn’t resist putting that up there)
Bella: Could you, like, NOT eat people?
Jacob: What the hell Bella?! Do 你 think I’m a cannibal?!
Bella: Yes.
Jacob: …
Bella: I regret nothing.
-Valentines Day-
Jacob: I got 你 a box of 糖果 hearts because I pity that 你 don’t have anyone to care for you.
Bella: These hearts taste like the chalk 你 use to draw on the sidewalk.
Jacob: I’m a REALLY good at sculpting things.
Bella: So I’m eating…
Jacob: Yes, Bella. 你 are eating 心 shaped chalk.
Bella: I want more!
-The 下一个 day-
Bella: I’m gonna go cliff diving to hear Edward’s voice!
Guy in passing car: Don’t jump! It’s not worth it! (A/N that actually happened to me once, me and my 老友记 were on this bridge and my friend was looking over the edge and a guy passed 由 in a car and 说 “don’t jump!” anyways, back to the story)
Bella: -Shrugs- This’ll probably kill me, here goes nothing! -Jumps-
Edward’s voice: Swim like you’re immortal!
Bella: -Passes out-
-At Jacob’s house-
Jacob: Harry Clearwater died.
Bella: Finally…
-At Bella’s house-
Jacob: Vampire!
Bella: Woo!
Jacob: Oh, HELL no! I’ve picked up your pieces and you’re just going to go right back to them?
Bella: Yeah…
Jacob: Just makin’ sure. See ya Bells!
Bella: -walks inside-
Alice: Bella?
Bella: Alice!
Alice: Bella!
Mike: Mike!
Bella: How are 你 still lonely?! Go find Jessica 或者 something! Can’t 你 see we were having a moment?
Mike: Jessica still looks like a pregnant Chris Crocker.
Alice: …
Mike: -Sulks- Fine. 或者 maybe I’ll just go hang out with Anybody… (A/N Again, read AIM story to understand)
Alice: Why are 你 still alive?
Bella: Why are you?! 你 were supposed to die like 80 years ago!
Alice: Ouch… that was cold, Bella.
Bella: I regret nothing!
Alice: Well, anyways, Edward’s about to die and we have to go save him.
Bella: Cool, where are we going?
Alice: Italy.
Bella: Sweet, road trip!
-In Italy-
Alice: Run, fat boy, run!
Bella: -trips, hyperventilates, sweats-
Edward: I’m in hell! It owns.
Bella: Not yet. 你 will be soon, though, I’m sure of it.
Edward: Nice to see 你 too.
Felix: Die, die, die!
Bella: um… ahh??
Felix: Be afraid, be VERY afraid…
Edward: 糖果 Mountain, here we come!
-In vampire city… thing…-
Aro: 嘿 girl!
Bella: Edward, 你 never told me Aro was gay.
Edward: There are a lot of things I didn’t tell you.
Aro: So, Edward, Who’s the lucky lady? -Winks-
Edward: I don’t feel comfortable about this…
Bella: I’m Bella.
Aro: Nice to meet you, Bella. I have to say, I’m jealous. No one could ever live up to someone as godly as him.
Bella: Finally, someone I can relate to!
Edward: Okay, ew. Are 你 gonna kill us 或者 not?
Aro: That depends.
Edward: On?
Aro: On.
Edward: On…
Aro: On!
Edward: Dammit, Aro! Are 你 going to slaughter us 或者 what?!
Aro: That depends…
Edward: Go on with it.
Aro: On if you’ll bite her.
Edward: Hell no! An eternity with… her?! -Shudders-
Aro: If 你 don’t I’ll kill you’re family.
Edward: One 日 I’ll do it… eventually…
Aro: Fabulous. Oh, And Edward? Come back any time 你 want. –winks and giggles-
Edward: Um… no. –Picks up Bella like a football and runs-
-At Bella’s house-
Bella: Don’t leave me again! I still 爱情 you!
Edward: And 你 still smell good!
Bella: I never want 你 to leave again!
Edward: Never say never, Bella!
Bella: What are you, Barney? And 你 just 说 it twice…
Edward: Well piss off! I didn’t want you, anyway!
Bella: You’ll stay though, right?
Edward: I guess. I mean, I have no where else to live.
Bella: Score!
Edward: Don’t push it.
Bella: So are 你 really gonna change me?
Edward: Probably not.
Bella: Screw you. I’ll ask the others.
-At Cullen House-
Bella: Want me to become a vampire?
Rosalie: I’d kill myself before that happened.
Bella: It’s not even possible for 你 to kill yourself...
Rosalie: Shut up, bitch!
Bella: What are everyone else’s opinions on this?
Emmett: Dah… four? -Drools-
Esme: 首页 DEPOT!
Bella: Anymore fanfiction stereotypical answers?
Alice: SHOOPPING!
Jasper: Emo! EEEEMOOOO!! Cut the pain away! -runs to corner and cries while cutting wrists-
Bella: What about Carlisle?
Carlisle: I don’t really have a stereotype.
Bella: Oh.
Carlisle: So are we changing you?
Edward: No! We didn’t even get any real answers!
Bella: I know. But we are going to do what I want. I mean, I am the guest.
Edward: Screw it all, I’m going to Canada.
Bella: No! We have school tomorrow!
Edward: Oh yeah… Let’s go back to Charlie.
-At Charlie’s house-
Jacob: 嘿 Bella, I’m baaaaack… 逼债, 墩 逼债, 墩 DUN!
Bella: Oh no!
Edward: Oh no!
Charlie: Oh no!
Koolaid man: Oh yeah!
Edward: Oh my god, NO! 你 can only do that on Tuesdays!
Koolaid man: No one told ME that…
No one: I 说 no such thing!
Jacob: I thought I killed you!
Edward: -slaps forehead- just… get out of here…
Koolaid man: -walks away shamefully with no one-
Jacob: Ahem… Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah. I’M BACK! MUAHAHAHA!
Bella: Why?
Jacob: What?
Bella: Why? Why are 你 back?
Jacob: Oh… um. I told Charlie about the motorcycles.
Bella: That sucks.
Jacob: It should.
Charlie: BELLA! GET IN HERE BEFORE I TAKE AWAY MR. FEELINGS!
Jacob: Mr. Feelings? What the hell?
Bella: He’s the only one that listens to me. He’s my best friend.
Jacob: Um.
Edward: Yeah. Um.
Bella: I have a lot of free time.
Edward: I’ve noticed.
Bella: Well, I’m gonna go now. See 你 guys later.
Jacob: No! That’s not supposed to happen! I’m supposed to go off, then Edward is supposed to comfort you.
Bella: Oh. Okay.
Jacob: I think this is my cue to leave. –Runs-
Bella: Oh, no! What did I do?!
Edward: I don’t know. What DID 你 do?
Bella: No! You’re supposed to hug me and tell me everything is going to be alright!
Edward: Oh. It’ll be alright… -Hugs Bella awkwardly-
Bella: I feel all better now! Let’s go play Hide and Seek in the Meadow.
