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诗歌 问题

Is this good for a tweve 年 old? Its a song called " i miss you" written 由 a twelve 年 old.

The pain is too deep to handle. your all i wish for when i blow that candle. even in my sleep you're all i think of. i'll always wonder if 你 do the same, while 你 look at the stars up above.every tear that falls from my eyes represents how much i miss you. i picked 你 out of all the guys. now will 你 do the same for me? I've tried so hard not to cry but it hurts so much i'd rather die. i think of 你 日 and night. if someone interferes i put up a fight. I miss you. Do 你 miss me too? is it possible to hurt so much? i miss 你 and your gentle touch. i wish that 你 were here with me; holading hands on a branch of a tree. i wish that 你 could pull me close. i think i took and overdose.... of you. i cant stand it. help me up. ill start a riot. be my love. i'll cry and cry till 你 reach me... and wait for 你 to 吻乐队(Kiss) me.
 Monicaluv posted 一年多以前
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诗歌 答案

MattxAliceNine said:
for a 12 年 old really good but there holding is misspelled
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posted 一年多以前 
Vixie79 said:
That is really good. I imagine 由 the time she is 17 或者 so she'll be mind blowing with her own style of course. This 写作 isn't particularly my favorite, but it's still good 写作 wise.
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posted 一年多以前 
irena83 said:
Cute! ;)
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posted 一年多以前 
skillet_luvr said:
Very good for a twelve 年 old. :)
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posted 一年多以前 
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