Hello all 你 fuck boys in fuck boy bands. I'm sure 你 all know why we've joined this club- to dedicate our lives to God's 最喜爱的 anti-band, Waterparks, also known as Parx, Parx Boiz 或者 Awsten Knight Is A Poser.

But how well do we really know this band? Well, I'm here to rustle your jimmies, slow down your jellybeans, and hide under your porch because boy do I have some scorching hot 茶 for you.

Waterparks, and the members, are a lie

Now what has brought me to this spicey conclusion, 你 may ask? Well, after a 年 and a half of worship I finally opened my third eye. To save 你 from all that...