I agree with the Max X guy, 你 have something but it needs some work. probly try not to sound exactly like the who ever your trying to sing and control your voice, 你 sound like your trying to hard
Honestly, not bad... Could use a lot of work, but still not horrible 或者 anything. I think 你 should try to put 更多 passion into it. Dont be afraid to SMILE, use your eyes to 显示 that 你 are actually FEELING the song and what it means.