“Come on! Come on!” I whined as I flipped through the shows on my TV. “Oh for the 爱情 of God, how much longer!?”
“Are 你 still waiting for the new South Park episodes?” asked my mom, entering my room.
“Mom, 你 don’t understand! I’ve been waiting for the 秒 half of season fourteen to come out for five months now,” I said. “Every 日 time is slowing down. It’s like…waiting for Christmas…times a thousand.”
“You’re just going to have to be patient until October sixth,” my mom told me as she pulled me away from the TV.
“No! NOOOO!” I yelled.
I couldn’t listen to what the teachers were talking about at school. All I could think about was South Park. I finally became exasperated, threw up my arms, and yelled, “I can’t take it anymore!” I then ran out of the classroom.
I lay in 床, 床上 that night, tossing and turning, watching the clock slowly change numbers. I looked at my calendar and saw October sixth marked so that I would never miss it. I went on to SouthParkStudios.com, just to see ads for the new mini-season. I groaned when only five 分钟 had passed; three weeks was going to take forever. “Aargh! That does it! I am not waiting three weeks!” I shouted.
That’s when I came up with my best idea ever.
At the bus stop the 下一个 morning, I asked my 老友记 to help me freeze myself. That way, the three week wait would seem instantaneous to me.
Surprisingly, they all refused.
“Fine! I thought 你 were my friends, but I guess I was wrong!” I screamed, “After all we’ve been through, 你 guys won’t even help me freeze myself!” And I stormed off.
I tried freezing myself in the freezer that night, but to no avail; my mom found me and made me get out.
However, I remembered that my little brother might help me. I went to him and demanded that he help me freeze myself in the mountains. He happily complied and came along with me out into the snow.
We trudged through the snow and the cold wind nipped our faces. “Now remember where this place is. 你 are not to unfreeze me until the new episode of South Park premiers!” I said, burying myself up to my neck with snow.
“Got it,” he said. He began to walk off, but took one last look at me.
“Get out of here, 你 asshole!” I yelled at him. He turned around and quickly retreated.
It had been hours, maybe days. It was snowing hard, and I was freezing all over. I wanted to leave, but I just kept thinking about how horrible the wait was for South Park. “I’m coming – South Park,” I choked out before my 心 stopped and I became completely frozen.
Little did I know that an avalanche occurred while I was asleep. It completely covered me with over twenty feet of snow, making me impossible to find. My brother came to look for me, but couldn’t find where I had buried myself. I was then 《冰雪奇缘》 in ice … for five hundred years.
The 下一个 thing I knew, I was waking up in a strange place where nothing was recognizable. “We’ve got a pulse!” someone said. I sat up, gasping for breath.
“Can 你 understand me?” 说 a strange person.
I sat up. “Where am I?” I asked instead, thinking I was in a hospital 或者 something.
“My name is Schpeck. And 你 are 安全 now,” he told me. “This is going to be hard for 你 to hear, but it is the 年 2550. 你 have been 《冰雪奇缘》 in ice for over 500 years.”
“What!?” I exclaimed, standing up. “Are the new South Park season fourteen episodes out yet!?”
Another person there brought up a float screen. “Ah, South Park. A primitive animated 显示 that was 流行的 in her time,” he explained.
“Primitive!? It’s the best 显示 ever!” I yelled, enraged. “So are the new episodes out 或者 not?”
“We don’t watch South Park in our time. There’s no such thing as South Park,” 说 Schpeck, “There is only Family Guy.”
“No,” I 说 unable to hold myself up. I fell to my knees and screamed, “NOOOOOO!”
So it begins...
“Are 你 still waiting for the new South Park episodes?” asked my mom, entering my room.
“Mom, 你 don’t understand! I’ve been waiting for the 秒 half of season fourteen to come out for five months now,” I said. “Every 日 time is slowing down. It’s like…waiting for Christmas…times a thousand.”
“You’re just going to have to be patient until October sixth,” my mom told me as she pulled me away from the TV.
“No! NOOOO!” I yelled.
I couldn’t listen to what the teachers were talking about at school. All I could think about was South Park. I finally became exasperated, threw up my arms, and yelled, “I can’t take it anymore!” I then ran out of the classroom.
I lay in 床, 床上 that night, tossing and turning, watching the clock slowly change numbers. I looked at my calendar and saw October sixth marked so that I would never miss it. I went on to SouthParkStudios.com, just to see ads for the new mini-season. I groaned when only five 分钟 had passed; three weeks was going to take forever. “Aargh! That does it! I am not waiting three weeks!” I shouted.
That’s when I came up with my best idea ever.
At the bus stop the 下一个 morning, I asked my 老友记 to help me freeze myself. That way, the three week wait would seem instantaneous to me.
Surprisingly, they all refused.
“Fine! I thought 你 were my friends, but I guess I was wrong!” I screamed, “After all we’ve been through, 你 guys won’t even help me freeze myself!” And I stormed off.
I tried freezing myself in the freezer that night, but to no avail; my mom found me and made me get out.
However, I remembered that my little brother might help me. I went to him and demanded that he help me freeze myself in the mountains. He happily complied and came along with me out into the snow.
We trudged through the snow and the cold wind nipped our faces. “Now remember where this place is. 你 are not to unfreeze me until the new episode of South Park premiers!” I said, burying myself up to my neck with snow.
“Got it,” he said. He began to walk off, but took one last look at me.
“Get out of here, 你 asshole!” I yelled at him. He turned around and quickly retreated.
It had been hours, maybe days. It was snowing hard, and I was freezing all over. I wanted to leave, but I just kept thinking about how horrible the wait was for South Park. “I’m coming – South Park,” I choked out before my 心 stopped and I became completely frozen.
Little did I know that an avalanche occurred while I was asleep. It completely covered me with over twenty feet of snow, making me impossible to find. My brother came to look for me, but couldn’t find where I had buried myself. I was then 《冰雪奇缘》 in ice … for five hundred years.
The 下一个 thing I knew, I was waking up in a strange place where nothing was recognizable. “We’ve got a pulse!” someone said. I sat up, gasping for breath.
“Can 你 understand me?” 说 a strange person.
I sat up. “Where am I?” I asked instead, thinking I was in a hospital 或者 something.
“My name is Schpeck. And 你 are 安全 now,” he told me. “This is going to be hard for 你 to hear, but it is the 年 2550. 你 have been 《冰雪奇缘》 in ice for over 500 years.”
“What!?” I exclaimed, standing up. “Are the new South Park season fourteen episodes out yet!?”
Another person there brought up a float screen. “Ah, South Park. A primitive animated 显示 that was 流行的 in her time,” he explained.
“Primitive!? It’s the best 显示 ever!” I yelled, enraged. “So are the new episodes out 或者 not?”
“We don’t watch South Park in our time. There’s no such thing as South Park,” 说 Schpeck, “There is only Family Guy.”
“No,” I 说 unable to hold myself up. I fell to my knees and screamed, “NOOOOOO!”
So it begins...
