11 Things 你 Will Always Remember About The 日 你 Almost Caught Captain Jack Sparrow 

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11 Things You Will Always Remember About the Day You Almost Caught Captain Jack Sparrow

Captain Jack’s arrival at Port Royal was quite a day, to say the least. We’d ask if you remember what day we’re talking about, but that’s a silly question: literally by definition, you will always remember it. But have you ever imagined what it would be like to actually be there, on the dock, witnessing Captain Jack’s devilishly clever escape? Perhaps as a soldier of the Queen? We have (obviously), and we decided that not only would we remember the day, we would remember eleven very specific things:

The sun beats relentlessly down on your shoulders, and it’s almost as stifling as whatever boring thing is currently being dragged out in honor of Norrington’s promotion from Important Guy to More Important Guy. You’re not sure of the specifics.

2. You were totes spying on Norrington during his long and drawn-out proposal to Elizabeth.

Well, spying is a strong word. You had to stand next to the cannon and guard the fort from embarrassingly sincere marriage proposals or something. You and your friends all had a pool going about when Norrington would pop the question, and you’re slightly miffed that Steve appears to have won, since you bet Norrington would do it after dinner.

Game changer! And then the ocean does this weird pulse thing that you’re not sure if you imagined, but no, Steve appears to have seen it too. You guys conspire: yep, the ocean definitely pulsed.

You’re a strange mixture of relieved, confused, and thrilled. It’s exhilarating. Norrington chases down the pirate, and everyone else pulls out their bayonets, so you do too.

5. Governor Swann is all, “Shoot him!” But then Elizabeth goes, “Father!”

You’re like, great, more Swann family drama. This should be good. Tensions are running high.

6. Norrington takes the lead with a handshake that turns into a total fake-out!

This guy is a confirmed pirate. He’s toast. Everyone starts going through the pirate’s stuff. The consensus is that he’s not a very good pirate. You don’t judge him for that; you’re not a very good pirate either. Probably. You’ve never tried, so you can’t know for sure, but you have a strong feeling. It’s Captain Jack Sparrow. You’ve heard of him!

7. Elizabeth is so done. She is not going to let Captain Jack get hanged without a fight.

(Hanged? Hung? You’re pretty sure it’s hanged.) Norrington tells her one good deed can’t redeem a lifetime of wickedness, and Sparrow counters that it seems enough to condemn him. You’re just standing in the back like, “True, true.” You can see both sides, really. The best strategy right now seems to be to follow everyone else’s lead, which is what you do like 99% of the time anyway, if you’re being honest.

8. Captain Jack has gotten ahold of Elizabeth and is now making demands for all of his stuff back.

You know you’re on the side of the law, and all, but you have to admit this guy is good. You’re willing to bet that Steve agrees—you guys will totally have to debrief this later.

9. Captain Jack announces to the dock at large, “You will always remember this as the day that you almost caught Captain Jack Sparrow.”

Legendary. Absolutely legendary. He swings off in a feat of acrobatics and the feeling you’re feeling can only be described as “overwhelmingly thrilled.”

10. As Captain Jack swings away, a cannon comes crashing down through the dock!

Steve totally falls in. Your first instinct is to laugh, but then you remember yourself and you make sure he’s okay. He is, so you can laugh again. You and Steve agree: today will be remembered forevermore as The Day You Almost Caught Captain Jack Sparrow.

11. You can’t wait to rush home and immediately mark this date down on all your calendars so that you can remember it every year.

Fingers crossed that this day wasn’t an anniversary or birthday or other date with any kind of importance to you, because the thunder has been irrevocably stolen, you know?

Tagged as: Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

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