ok guys so all this freaking hilarious one no 显示 爬坡道, 小山 crap is getting crazy! 你 know what that means instant inspiration! so here's some crap i just threw together hope 你 like
Chad sits in his trailer and flips open the Wilmington newspaper.
"One 树 爬坡道, 小山 renewed for 7th season" he reads aloud laughing to himself. He picks up his phone and dials a number still laughing as the person 答案 "Hello" the person on the other line says.
"You are freaking kidding me right? A new season? 你 are seriously an idiot aren't you?
"Hey Chad, no they've confirmed it. We will be having a new season.
"Well count me out. Dude 你 already don't pay me enough. This is my 显示 I'm the star.
"Yeah Chad 你 are the star, but 你 know I can't pay 你 anymore"
"Yeah because your either to busy fantasizing about Hilarie 或者 giving all the money to Lee because he is the One 树 爬坡道, 小山 version of yourself."
"Okay first of all Hil is hot and I'm a forty something 年 old man still living with my parents, and Mouth is the coolest. 嘿 and aren't 你 the one who always called us the little engine that could?"
"That freaking engine is dead, and your main conductor aka me has jumped off that caboose!I'm not coming back so why don't 你 do us all a favor and just like kill off my whiny character 或者 make him 移动 away 或者 some crap like that"
"Chad..."
"Hanging up now"
"But.."
"Bu bye"
ring ring
"Oh God not again" Mark says and picks up his phone
"Hey Mark" Hil says over the line enthusiastically.
"Hey Hil, so have 你 heard they've renewed us for a new season?"
"Oh that's great"
"Really? So you'll do it?"
"Oh hell know but 你 have fun with that?"
"But Hil, this is your 显示 now. Chad's gone so it's your time to shine. 你 can be the main star"
"Dude I already am, speaking of could 你 take those pics of me off your 墙 they totally creep me out"
"Oh yeah sorry" Mark says sheepishly.
"Yeah I mean without Chad I have nobody to kiss, I mean unless 你 make it a breyton lesbian 爱情 fest! That would totally appeal to the gay audience!"
"Yeah I don't know.."
"Yeah well I'm out. See 你 later 你 big lug!
"Bye Hilarie"
"Oh and 你 should totally go to my blog Southern 哥特式 productions"
"Sure bye Hilarie"
"If 你 need a job I here Gossip Girl is hiring"
"See 你 later"
ring ring
"Are 你 freaking kidding me" Mark whispers under his breathe before answering the phone.
"Hello"
"Hey Mark it's Soph"
"Oh 嘿 Soph! I can always count on 你 to come through"
"About that Mark...I'm out"
"Soph"
"I'm sorry but I can't 你 know."
"But Soph, Chad and Hilarie are gone, this is your 显示 now!"
"No offense Mark, but this is kind of my show. I mean everybody loves Brooke, but I can't."
"Soph"
"Seriously Mark. It's like I'm in relationship twilight zone. I have to work with my ex-husband, my ex- boyfriend, and my sort of kind of current boyfriend. I mean that's like way screwed up"
"Well we could totally write that into the show. I mean I usually just put whatever crap happens in your life on the 显示 anyway."
"Trust me I know. I would have offered Breyton smut, but since Hil is out, I'm out too. Bye Mark."
"Wait dude I'll totally put in the lesbian..."
"Have a lovely 日 Mark" Sophia says before hanging up.
"Just great, three out, two to go"
ring ring
"When does that do not call button kick in" he askes himself before picking up the phone."
"I'm out"
"Good morning to 你 too Joy"
"Sorry, good morning, but I'm out"
"Why?"
"Because we've been on this 显示 for 6 years, and I want to go 首页 and get pregnant, like really good and pregnant"
"Oh come on, it's your 显示 now Joy. 你 can get pregnant anytime, but right now this is your chance. Chad, Hil, and Soph are out it's your 显示 now"
"Which I've have to say would be about damn time. You've been giving me all the crappy storylines. Double 日期 with Mia and Chase? I mean really 你 couldn't give Naley（南森和海莉） one hot night out, just the two of them?
"Ok fine I'll turn the 显示 into a Naley（南森和海莉） porno is that what 你 want? Because I'll do it, all the rain scenes 你 could want"
"Oh yeah and speaking of no rain scenes? Really Mark your a dumbbutt"
"So I've been told"
"I would say that Lucas and I should do like a whole affair thing but since Chad's out, I'm out too"
"Are 你 kidding me"
"Nope, now bye" Joy 说 cheerfully as she hung up the phone.
"Yeah bye" he 说 mockingly. "Man I'm freaking Mark Schwann. The creator of One 树 Hill, loved 由 all, well except for the occasional 100 death threats, but anyway"
Mark is taken out of his delusions 由 a ringing phone.
ring ring
"What?" he yells loudly.
"Okay I'm guessing everyone else has called, so I'll make this short and sweet. I'm out, there is not enough scenes of me shirtless, I haven't got to 吻乐队（Kiss） Sophia yet which really pisses me off, and quiet frankly I just don't like you."
"Anything else"
"Oh yeah I think that your a freak and 你 are super stalkerish when it comes to HB"
"Ok 你 caught me 接吻 her pic one time"
"French 接吻 it, don't remind me. Anyway why don't 你 try Jackson. I'm sure he'd 爱情 a Jamie spin off"
"This could have been your 显示 James"
"Dude it already was. Did 你 not see all the girls screaming my name?"
"Ok bye"
"Cya NBA here I come" James says before hanging up the phone.
"Pipe dreams" Mark says rolling his eyes.
"Well Jackson it is then" Mark says dialing his number.
ring ring
"Hello"
"Jackon my man"
"Mark my man, what's happening?"
"You are buddy. I'm talking a whole new show. A Jamie spinoff"
"Oh Mark that sounds cool, but 迪士尼 already called."
"Disney?"
"Yep. They want to make a movie about me. Jackson and Chester goes Hollywood. We're going to be stars! Isn't that right Chester" Jamie says, giggling at his rabbit.
"J bud that's great! But 你 could also be a 星, 星级 on your own show. Doesn't that sound great?"
"No offense Mark, but I did own the show. I'm the cutest, everyone loves Jimmy Jam."
"Jackons"
"Oh gotta go Mark. Mom has icecream. Mmm yum! Coming mom"
"Shit"
"Ah 你 说 a bad word. That's $20 to the Jackson college fund. 你 better pay up mister. Bye." Jackson 说 before hanging up.
"Great"
ring ring
"I'm out Dawg"
Antwon"
"Sorry this cougar is done"
"Barbara"
"This cockroach has been squashed"
"Paul"
"Sorry"
"Lisa"
"Julian wanted all the girls, there are no girls. Do 你 see my dilemma?"
"Austin"
"Your mini 你 is out. And I'm sick of 你 making me into a mousy whimp. I could totally kick your ass."
"Lee
This continued for the 下一个 few hours
*The 下一个 day*
"Looks like your the only one left. I guess your the new Luke"
"I'll do my best" he says before taking his spot on the rivercourt and shooting the ball in the hoop."
"God I guess we are going to have to name the 显示 ONE because that's all we've got left" Mark 说 to Greg Prange as they took their seats.
"Oh yeah it's Fergie's time to shine" 菲姬 says, winking at the camera.
THE END
Chad sits in his trailer and flips open the Wilmington newspaper.
"One 树 爬坡道, 小山 renewed for 7th season" he reads aloud laughing to himself. He picks up his phone and dials a number still laughing as the person 答案 "Hello" the person on the other line says.
"You are freaking kidding me right? A new season? 你 are seriously an idiot aren't you?
"Hey Chad, no they've confirmed it. We will be having a new season.
"Well count me out. Dude 你 already don't pay me enough. This is my 显示 I'm the star.
"Yeah Chad 你 are the star, but 你 know I can't pay 你 anymore"
"Yeah because your either to busy fantasizing about Hilarie 或者 giving all the money to Lee because he is the One 树 爬坡道, 小山 version of yourself."
"Okay first of all Hil is hot and I'm a forty something 年 old man still living with my parents, and Mouth is the coolest. 嘿 and aren't 你 the one who always called us the little engine that could?"
"That freaking engine is dead, and your main conductor aka me has jumped off that caboose!I'm not coming back so why don't 你 do us all a favor and just like kill off my whiny character 或者 make him 移动 away 或者 some crap like that"
"Chad..."
"Hanging up now"
"But.."
"Bu bye"
ring ring
"Oh God not again" Mark says and picks up his phone
"Hey Mark" Hil says over the line enthusiastically.
"Hey Hil, so have 你 heard they've renewed us for a new season?"
"Oh that's great"
"Really? So you'll do it?"
"Oh hell know but 你 have fun with that?"
"But Hil, this is your 显示 now. Chad's gone so it's your time to shine. 你 can be the main star"
"Dude I already am, speaking of could 你 take those pics of me off your 墙 they totally creep me out"
"Oh yeah sorry" Mark says sheepishly.
"Yeah I mean without Chad I have nobody to kiss, I mean unless 你 make it a breyton lesbian 爱情 fest! That would totally appeal to the gay audience!"
"Yeah I don't know.."
"Yeah well I'm out. See 你 later 你 big lug!
"Bye Hilarie"
"Oh and 你 should totally go to my blog Southern 哥特式 productions"
"Sure bye Hilarie"
"If 你 need a job I here Gossip Girl is hiring"
"See 你 later"
ring ring
"Are 你 freaking kidding me" Mark whispers under his breathe before answering the phone.
"Hello"
"Hey Mark it's Soph"
"Oh 嘿 Soph! I can always count on 你 to come through"
"About that Mark...I'm out"
"Soph"
"I'm sorry but I can't 你 know."
"But Soph, Chad and Hilarie are gone, this is your 显示 now!"
"No offense Mark, but this is kind of my show. I mean everybody loves Brooke, but I can't."
"Soph"
"Seriously Mark. It's like I'm in relationship twilight zone. I have to work with my ex-husband, my ex- boyfriend, and my sort of kind of current boyfriend. I mean that's like way screwed up"
"Well we could totally write that into the show. I mean I usually just put whatever crap happens in your life on the 显示 anyway."
"Trust me I know. I would have offered Breyton smut, but since Hil is out, I'm out too. Bye Mark."
"Wait dude I'll totally put in the lesbian..."
"Have a lovely 日 Mark" Sophia says before hanging up.
"Just great, three out, two to go"
ring ring
"When does that do not call button kick in" he askes himself before picking up the phone."
"I'm out"
"Good morning to 你 too Joy"
"Sorry, good morning, but I'm out"
"Why?"
"Because we've been on this 显示 for 6 years, and I want to go 首页 and get pregnant, like really good and pregnant"
"Oh come on, it's your 显示 now Joy. 你 can get pregnant anytime, but right now this is your chance. Chad, Hil, and Soph are out it's your 显示 now"
"Which I've have to say would be about damn time. You've been giving me all the crappy storylines. Double 日期 with Mia and Chase? I mean really 你 couldn't give Naley（南森和海莉） one hot night out, just the two of them?
"Ok fine I'll turn the 显示 into a Naley（南森和海莉） porno is that what 你 want? Because I'll do it, all the rain scenes 你 could want"
"Oh yeah and speaking of no rain scenes? Really Mark your a dumbbutt"
"So I've been told"
"I would say that Lucas and I should do like a whole affair thing but since Chad's out, I'm out too"
"Are 你 kidding me"
"Nope, now bye" Joy 说 cheerfully as she hung up the phone.
"Yeah bye" he 说 mockingly. "Man I'm freaking Mark Schwann. The creator of One 树 Hill, loved 由 all, well except for the occasional 100 death threats, but anyway"
Mark is taken out of his delusions 由 a ringing phone.
ring ring
"What?" he yells loudly.
"Okay I'm guessing everyone else has called, so I'll make this short and sweet. I'm out, there is not enough scenes of me shirtless, I haven't got to 吻乐队（Kiss） Sophia yet which really pisses me off, and quiet frankly I just don't like you."
"Anything else"
"Oh yeah I think that your a freak and 你 are super stalkerish when it comes to HB"
"Ok 你 caught me 接吻 her pic one time"
"French 接吻 it, don't remind me. Anyway why don't 你 try Jackson. I'm sure he'd 爱情 a Jamie spin off"
"This could have been your 显示 James"
"Dude it already was. Did 你 not see all the girls screaming my name?"
"Ok bye"
"Cya NBA here I come" James says before hanging up the phone.
"Pipe dreams" Mark says rolling his eyes.
"Well Jackson it is then" Mark says dialing his number.
ring ring
"Hello"
"Jackon my man"
"Mark my man, what's happening?"
"You are buddy. I'm talking a whole new show. A Jamie spinoff"
"Oh Mark that sounds cool, but 迪士尼 already called."
"Disney?"
"Yep. They want to make a movie about me. Jackson and Chester goes Hollywood. We're going to be stars! Isn't that right Chester" Jamie says, giggling at his rabbit.
"J bud that's great! But 你 could also be a 星, 星级 on your own show. Doesn't that sound great?"
"No offense Mark, but I did own the show. I'm the cutest, everyone loves Jimmy Jam."
"Jackons"
"Oh gotta go Mark. Mom has icecream. Mmm yum! Coming mom"
"Shit"
"Ah 你 说 a bad word. That's $20 to the Jackson college fund. 你 better pay up mister. Bye." Jackson 说 before hanging up.
"Great"
ring ring
"I'm out Dawg"
Antwon"
"Sorry this cougar is done"
"Barbara"
"This cockroach has been squashed"
"Paul"
"Sorry"
"Lisa"
"Julian wanted all the girls, there are no girls. Do 你 see my dilemma?"
"Austin"
"Your mini 你 is out. And I'm sick of 你 making me into a mousy whimp. I could totally kick your ass."
"Lee
This continued for the 下一个 few hours
*The 下一个 day*
"Looks like your the only one left. I guess your the new Luke"
"I'll do my best" he says before taking his spot on the rivercourt and shooting the ball in the hoop."
"God I guess we are going to have to name the 显示 ONE because that's all we've got left" Mark 说 to Greg Prange as they took their seats.
"Oh yeah it's Fergie's time to shine" 菲姬 says, winking at the camera.
THE END
Fergilicious! its hot hot
