This is the letter Carter wrote Abby when he was in the Congo. I found it on NBC's website, and thought I'd share it with you! Enjoy!
Dear Abby,
由 the time 你 read this letter, Luka should be 安全 in America and 你 will probably be wondering why I'm not with him. Before 你 go blaming yourself let me just say, it's not you, it's me - and I know even as I write this that you're going to think that's a breakup cliché, but if 你 could just try and hold back your judgment - and your condemnation - for a minute, maybe 你 will actually be able to understand what I'm trying to say. Being here has changed me in ways I never imagined. It put everything in perspective. County, Gamma's death, you. Well, me and you. We just had to work so hard at everything. Too hard, 你 know? When I think back on our last 年 together, everything appears hazy, muddled. And in the Congo, everything is very clear. People are suffering. I can help them. They need me. In a way that 你 don't.
You're much stronger than 你 think. 你 don't need me, Abby, and I don't think 你 ever really did. We both know we would work better unfettered. I think that at one point 你 convinced yourself that I was the right guy for 你 - reliable and safe, and I don't know, stable - but I don't think that that's what 你 really want. When we were just friends, it was safe. Maybe we even put each other on pedestals, I don't know. And then when we were finally together, it didn't become what either of us thought it would be. I didn't end up being what 你 expected, and 你 didn't end up being…sorry, I'm rambling.
I gave 你 as much as I could, but it wasn't enough. Clearly, there were a lot of things going on in your life that were 更多 important, understandably. Eric's disease, your mother. Your life is complicated, and I didn't fit into that mix very well, did I? I tried to help, but then when I needed you…I don't know.
The light is dying. I don't want to waste any 更多 kerosene.
I don't know how long I'm going to end up staying here. Don't wait for me.
I also want to say thank you. 你 are still one of the most amazing people I know.
Love,
Carter
Dear Abby,
由 the time 你 read this letter, Luka should be 安全 in America and 你 will probably be wondering why I'm not with him. Before 你 go blaming yourself let me just say, it's not you, it's me - and I know even as I write this that you're going to think that's a breakup cliché, but if 你 could just try and hold back your judgment - and your condemnation - for a minute, maybe 你 will actually be able to understand what I'm trying to say. Being here has changed me in ways I never imagined. It put everything in perspective. County, Gamma's death, you. Well, me and you. We just had to work so hard at everything. Too hard, 你 know? When I think back on our last 年 together, everything appears hazy, muddled. And in the Congo, everything is very clear. People are suffering. I can help them. They need me. In a way that 你 don't.
You're much stronger than 你 think. 你 don't need me, Abby, and I don't think 你 ever really did. We both know we would work better unfettered. I think that at one point 你 convinced yourself that I was the right guy for 你 - reliable and safe, and I don't know, stable - but I don't think that that's what 你 really want. When we were just friends, it was safe. Maybe we even put each other on pedestals, I don't know. And then when we were finally together, it didn't become what either of us thought it would be. I didn't end up being what 你 expected, and 你 didn't end up being…sorry, I'm rambling.
I gave 你 as much as I could, but it wasn't enough. Clearly, there were a lot of things going on in your life that were 更多 important, understandably. Eric's disease, your mother. Your life is complicated, and I didn't fit into that mix very well, did I? I tried to help, but then when I needed you…I don't know.
The light is dying. I don't want to waste any 更多 kerosene.
I don't know how long I'm going to end up staying here. Don't wait for me.
I also want to say thank you. 你 are still one of the most amazing people I know.
Love,
Carter
