Will 最佳, 返回页首 Gear Survive Without Jism Clarkson???

It’s all very hush-hush at the moment, but apparently Jeremy Clarkson has a terminal illness. It’s as yet unknown whether it’s related to his years of smoking cigarettes 或者 something else. Apparently, surgical efforts were not effective, and the very large growth lodged in his rectum (a bug) is eating away at him. Despite that, he’s his usual upbeat self, though it is clear in watching him walk (seen in the latest 最佳, 返回页首 Gear episodes) that he’s favoring his anus (which most, if not all, Englishmen do).

To make matters worse, he’s had at least one medical complication resulting from chemotherapy. Specifically, instead of shrinking the large insect, the chemotherapy has shrunk his already diminutive penis. The silver lining to this side-effect is that his prior existing bitterness over the lack of girth and length has increased manifold and has led to a correspondingly increased sense of humor!

Many of his peers, such as Piers Morgan, are devastated. Now, the only pansy Mr. 摩根 will be able to smash is the one in his garden. Not to worry, Jism’s wife has already had one of her enormous front teeth pulled for the production of a headstone once he passes on. As a side note, the tooth is so typically English and large, excess portions of it are being donated to 钢琴 makers throughout London.

你 can send e-mails of well wishes to Jism.Clarkson@whingingpom.com.