Mr. Schue: Well, guys. The 日 is fast approaching. I want 你 all to start thinking about what you're going to do for the last days in high school, as well as the future that lies ahead for 你 when 你 attend college.
Rachel: No need, Mr. Schue. I'm way ahead of you.
(Rachel walks to the front of the room with a blue briefcase. Mike Chang helps set up the white board. Quinn and Santana wait impatiently.)
Santana (whispering to Quinn): Does her big plans have to be this...well--
Quinn (whispering back): Well she's the same, overly ambitious and annoying Rachel Berry after all.
Santana (whispering back): True.
(The girls look up and see that Rachel has already put her plans on the white board behind her.)
Rachel: First, of course, I'll get into NYADA with Kurt Hummel for the 下一个 3 或者 4 years. Then we'll audition for a Broadway musical, tour around the United States--if lucky--and then I will get Finn Hudson to pose as a model for Calvin Klein.
(Artie, Rory, and Puck all snicker in the background.)
Finn: Oh, hold the f*ck up.
Mr. Schue: Finn!
Finn (to Mr. Schue): What?
Rachel: You're the one who needs help on their future. So don't get mad at me?!
Finn: Why the hell Calvin Klein?
Mr. Schue: Guys, enough. Let's find out what everyone else is doing, and we can handle 你 guys later.
Santana: Yes, it's very exhausting to hear Jew nose and Frankenteen talk about taking pictures in tighty-whites, and squealing and chirping around the Broadway area.
Rachel (to Santana): Oh, is your future better than mine, Santana?
Santana: 你 说 it right, baby granny.
Mr. Schue: So, what do 你 have planned, Santana?
Santana: Oh, I don't have to plan anything. I just want to be famous. It doesn't really matter to me what I do. As long as my face and name is on a trend magazine, then I want nothing more.
(Silence.)
Santana: So...
Mr. Schue: 你 know, not that many people get famous in life, Santana.
Santana: And 你 would know because 你 became a Spanish teacher and a director of a 欢乐合唱团 club that 迷失 12th place at Nationals. Don't try to spill your leakage on me. I have the determination. Nothing's gonna stop me.
(Santana walked out of the room. Everyone else was silent.)
Kurt: Kim Kardashian, much?
Sam: 或者 Snooki.
Kurt: True.
(In the library, Santana was 阅读 a book for her history class. She spotted some people looking at her. They were smiling and swooning. Others looked at her with shock. Rory and Artie came over to her.)
Artie: Santana, I think 你 just beat the 2 girls and a cup video. You're literally the hottest person I know. And that's from someone 你 threw breakfast eggs and cheese at in your sophomore year.
Rory (staring at Santana's chest, amazed): If only Ireland had some girl-on-girl action like that.
(Rory and Artie left the library, leaving Santana shocked.)
Santana (out loud): Why is everyone thinking that I pressed my chest up against their faces? I don't get what's going on.
(At that moment, Brittany came over. She was smiling at Santana, holding her laptop.)
Brittany: The 日 has finally come, Santana. Aren't 你 excited?
Santana: About what?
Brittany: You're famous. Remember the night we were watching "Sweet Valley High" and we made that 音乐 video?
Santana: What?
(Santana had a flashback of the other night she was over Brittany's house. They had finished watching "Sweet Valley High", and were making out on the bed.)
Santana: Brittany, I 爱情 你 so much.
Brittany: 爱情 you, too, Santana. And guess what? I have something sweet for you. I hope you're ready for it.
Santana: 你 ready for...it?
Brittany (confused): What's it?
Santana: 你 know...the nasty?
Brittany: I was actually talking about the big bag of 酸, 酸奶 Patches that I had stored in my closet. But nasty sounds kinda hot right now.
Santana: 你 do have condoms, do you?
Brittany: 你 mean the Ziplock bags in the pantry?
(Silence.)
Santana: Never mind. I'm way ahead of 你 already.
(The two continue to make out again.)
(Santana's flashback ends. She is embarrassed and shocked to find out that Brittany videotaped everything.)
Santana: Brittany, we made that for us, remember?
Brittany: But 你 说 in 欢乐合唱团 club already that 你 wanted to be famous. This is how 名人 start off.
Santana (moaning): God, now the whole school knows what's going on between us. How could this get any worse?
Brittany: Just to let 你 know, I'm a terrible editer and stuff. I have no idea how to do the transitions and whatever for a video. So I just put that LMFAO song on there.
Santana (silent for a second): Who else but Brittany...
Well, what did 你 think? I hope 你 liked it.
Here's the link for Chapter Thirty-Three!!!
Here's the link for Chapter Thirty-Five!!!
