Ross: I would 日期 her but there is a big age difference.
Joey: Well think about it when you're 90...
Ross: I know, she'll be 80 and it won't be such a big difference.
Joey: No. What I was gonna say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old
Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee 商店 ] If 你 want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: [receiving his 圣诞节 gift] 你 got me a cola drink.
Chandler: And a 柠檬 LIME.
Ross: 你 shouldn't have. I feel like I should get 你 another sweater.
Joey: And last but not least.
[Monica receives her gift]
Joey: They're RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.
Chandler: All right, look if 你 absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.
[pounding a scone]
Ross: Stupid British snack food.
Chandler: Did they teach 你 that in your anger management class?
[In response to a stupid comment]
Chandler: 你 have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance.
Rachel: Hey, just so 你 know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* "happen to every guy, " and it *is* a big deal!
Chandler: [pointing] I *knew* it!
Rachel: So are things between 你 and Joey getting any better?
Chandler: It couldn't get any worse. Last night, I spent eight hours calling him, trying to get him to talk to me.
Rachel: Oh, wow. Eight hours. So 你 could probably really use one of those plug-in telephone headsets, huh?
Ross: Should we all expect 圣诞节 gifts that can be stolen from your office?
Rachel: 你 shouldn't.
Judy Geller: Well, he better not come 由 here. He can't see the bride in the wedding dress.
Nora Bing: As I recall, when we got married, I saw the groom in the wedding dress.
Charles Bing: But that was after the wedding. It's not bad luck then.
Nora Bing: Honey, it isn't good luck.
Rachel: Wha... married?
Ross: Well, yeah, I think we should get married!
Rachel: What? Because that's your answer to everything?
Ross: Oh. *Oh*. Thank God, most women don't even feel them.
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Ross: 你 know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*!
Rachel: ...How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr Long: Three.
Ross: Just three? I'm dilated three!
Monica: Can 你 help me fold these napkins?
Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: I'm gonna go across the hall and check on the yams.
[Notices the way Pheobe is folding the napkins]
Monica: No... no honey... Not like that, we're not a 谷仓 dance. 你 wanna fold them like swans like I showed 你 at Christmas, remember?
Phoebe: Yeah. It all came screaming back to me.
Ross: Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and *won*!
Chandler: Ross came fourth and cried!
Monica: 你 don't like the game, because 你 suck at it.
Chandler: I don't suck at it. It sucks. And 你 suck.
Phoebe: [Imitating someone really annoying] "Oh, I slept with Billy Joel." Who hasn't?
Ross: What the hell are 你 doing, 你 scared the crap out of me!
Ross: What are 你 doing?
Chandler: Making 浓情巧克力 milk. 你 want some?
Ross: No thanks, I'm 29.
Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Chandler: Du-ude!
Monica: What happened in Atlantic City?
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar...
Chandler: Did 你 not hear me say, "Du-ude"?
Ross: ...and this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after a while he just goes over to her and, uh, after a 分钟 或者 two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what you're thinking. Chandler's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls. And you're right. Chandler's not the type of guy just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Monica: 你 kissed a guy? Oh my God.
Chandler: In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy.
Janice: [repeated line throughout the series] Oh... my... God!
Chandler: [after a resident has come on to Monica] Is there anyone in this building who hasn't tried to hit on you?
Monica: Well, there's Smokes-a-lot-Lady.
[thinks]
Monica: Wait a minute, that is not true.
Joey: [Joey, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica are in Chapel in Vegas after Rachel and Ross got married] Well, what happened, did we miss it?
Chandler: Well, we actually missed it.
Phoebe: [with clenched teeth] Well, maybe 你 wouldn't have if 你 could run in the chapel!
Ross: Can I borrow your blue tie? Emma spit on mine.
Chandler: Okay, but you'll have to give it back when I get a job. Of course, 由 then, ties will be obsolete and we'll all be wearing silver jumpsuits.
Rachel: Can 你 take care of Emma just for today?
Ross: Sure, just lend me your breasts and we'll be on our way.
Monica: Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!
Monica: Hi.
Chandler: 你 are not gonna believe what I did today.
Monica: Well, clearly 你 didn't 淋浴 或者 shave.
Chandler: I got good. I played this game all 日 and now I rule. They should change the name to Ms. Chandler.
[pause]
Chandler: Although, I hope they don't.
Monica: Wait a minute, 你 staid 首页 all 日 playing Ms. Pacman, while I was at work like some kind of chump?
Chandler: Yeah, and I got all the 最佳, 返回页首 ten scores and erased Phoebe off the board. High five!
Monica: What is the matter with your hand?
Chandler: Well, I've been playing for like eight hours. It'll loosen up, come on check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, their dirty words.
Monica: Chandler, why would 你 do that?
Chandler: Because it's awesome.
Monica: 你 think this is clever?
Chandler: Well, they only give 你 three letters, so after A.S.S., it is a bit of a challenge.
Monica: Wait a minute, this one's not dirty.
Chandler: Well, it is, when 你 put it together with that one.
Monica: Oh, well, if 你 don't clear this off, 你 wont be getting those from me. Ben's coming tomorrow over to play this game, this can't be there.
Chandler: Come on, he wont even know what they mean.
Monica: He's seven, not stupid.
Chandler: Have 你 talked to him lately?
Monica: All right, I'm just going to unplug it...
Chandler: No, no, no, if you'll unplug it, then there will be nothing to 显示 from my day. It would be like I was at work!
[Monica unplugs it]
Chandler: Look at that, look at that, it's still there, this thing must have a primitive ROM chip!
Monica: 你 gotta beat your scores.
Chandler: With the claw?
Monica: Fine, I'll do it. We gotta get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that 你 taught him "Pull my finger".
Chandler: Pull my finger... my hand is messed up!
Joey: I hate Pottery 谷仓 too! They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed.
Chandler: 你 took off your pants and cimbed under the sheets!
Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spidermen? 你 know, like Goldmen, Silvermen.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spidermen. He's a 蜘蛛 *man*. 你 know, like Goldmen is a last name but there's no 金牌 man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay...
Phoebe: There should *be* a 金牌 man!
Rachel: [Chandler has been left pantsless and handcuffed to Rachel's boss's desk. Rachel has grudgingly agreed to release him] 你 promise 你 will never see Joanna again.
Chandler: Never.
Rachel: 你 will never set foot in this office again.
Chandler: No.
Rachel: You'll give me back my Walkman.
Chandler: I prom... I never borrowed your Walkman.
Rachel: [pause] Well, then I 迷失 it, 你 buy me one!
Chandler: 你 got it! Come on!
Rachel: [unlocks cuffs. Chandler rubs wrists where cuffs were] Does it hurt?
Chandler: No, I just see guys doing this when they get cuffs taken off.
[runs over to office door where his pants are hanging]
Chandler: Hello, sweet pants!
Rachel: Wait a minute! How are 你 going to say 你 got out?
Chandler: I'll make something up. I'm good at lying. I actually did borrow your Walkman.
Joey: Well think about it when you're 90...
Ross: I know, she'll be 80 and it won't be such a big difference.
Joey: No. What I was gonna say is when you're 90 you'll still have the memory of what it was like to be with a 20-year-old
Phoebe: [Right after playing a song in the coffee 商店 ] If 你 want to receive e-mails about my upcoming shows, then please give me money so I can buy a computer.
Ross: [receiving his 圣诞节 gift] 你 got me a cola drink.
Chandler: And a 柠檬 LIME.
Ross: 你 shouldn't have. I feel like I should get 你 another sweater.
Joey: And last but not least.
[Monica receives her gift]
Joey: They're RIBBED FOR YOUR PLEASURE.
Chandler: All right, look if 你 absolutely have to tell her the truth, at least wait until the timing's right. And that's what deathbeds are for.
[pounding a scone]
Ross: Stupid British snack food.
Chandler: Did they teach 你 that in your anger management class?
[In response to a stupid comment]
Chandler: 你 have to stop the Q-Tip when there's resistance.
Rachel: Hey, just so 你 know: it's *not* that common, it *doesn't* "happen to every guy, " and it *is* a big deal!
Chandler: [pointing] I *knew* it!
Rachel: So are things between 你 and Joey getting any better?
Chandler: It couldn't get any worse. Last night, I spent eight hours calling him, trying to get him to talk to me.
Rachel: Oh, wow. Eight hours. So 你 could probably really use one of those plug-in telephone headsets, huh?
Ross: Should we all expect 圣诞节 gifts that can be stolen from your office?
Rachel: 你 shouldn't.
Judy Geller: Well, he better not come 由 here. He can't see the bride in the wedding dress.
Nora Bing: As I recall, when we got married, I saw the groom in the wedding dress.
Charles Bing: But that was after the wedding. It's not bad luck then.
Nora Bing: Honey, it isn't good luck.
Rachel: Wha... married?
Ross: Well, yeah, I think we should get married!
Rachel: What? Because that's your answer to everything?
Ross: Oh. *Oh*. Thank God, most women don't even feel them.
Rachel: Okay, no uterus, no opinion.
Ross: 你 know, we should probably ask the doctor if she even knows how to deliver a baby that's half human, half *pure evil*!
Rachel: ...How many centimeters am I dilated? Eight? Nine?
Dr Long: Three.
Ross: Just three? I'm dilated three!
Monica: Can 你 help me fold these napkins?
Phoebe: Sure.
Monica: I'm gonna go across the hall and check on the yams.
[Notices the way Pheobe is folding the napkins]
Monica: No... no honey... Not like that, we're not a 谷仓 dance. 你 wanna fold them like swans like I showed 你 at Christmas, remember?
Phoebe: Yeah. It all came screaming back to me.
Ross: Chandler entered a Vanilla Ice look-alike contest and *won*!
Chandler: Ross came fourth and cried!
Monica: 你 don't like the game, because 你 suck at it.
Chandler: I don't suck at it. It sucks. And 你 suck.
Phoebe: [Imitating someone really annoying] "Oh, I slept with Billy Joel." Who hasn't?
Ross: What the hell are 你 doing, 你 scared the crap out of me!
Ross: What are 你 doing?
Chandler: Making 浓情巧克力 milk. 你 want some?
Ross: No thanks, I'm 29.
Ross: Oh, really? Well, I guess Monica should know about Atlantic City.
Chandler: Du-ude!
Monica: What happened in Atlantic City?
Ross: Well, Chandler and I are in a bar...
Chandler: Did 你 not hear me say, "Du-ude"?
Ross: ...and this girl is making eyes at Chandler, okay? So after a while he just goes over to her and, uh, after a 分钟 或者 two, I see them kissing. Now, I know what you're thinking. Chandler's not the type of guy who just goes to bars and makes out with girls. And you're right. Chandler's not the type of guy just goes to bars and makes out with girls.
Monica: 你 kissed a guy? Oh my God.
Chandler: In my defense, it was dark and he was a very pretty guy.
Janice: [repeated line throughout the series] Oh... my... God!
Chandler: [after a resident has come on to Monica] Is there anyone in this building who hasn't tried to hit on you?
Monica: Well, there's Smokes-a-lot-Lady.
[thinks]
Monica: Wait a minute, that is not true.
Joey: [Joey, Phoebe, Chandler and Monica are in Chapel in Vegas after Rachel and Ross got married] Well, what happened, did we miss it?
Chandler: Well, we actually missed it.
Phoebe: [with clenched teeth] Well, maybe 你 wouldn't have if 你 could run in the chapel!
Ross: Can I borrow your blue tie? Emma spit on mine.
Chandler: Okay, but you'll have to give it back when I get a job. Of course, 由 then, ties will be obsolete and we'll all be wearing silver jumpsuits.
Rachel: Can 你 take care of Emma just for today?
Ross: Sure, just lend me your breasts and we'll be on our way.
Monica: Guys can fake it? Unbelievable! The one thing that's ours!
Monica: Hi.
Chandler: 你 are not gonna believe what I did today.
Monica: Well, clearly 你 didn't 淋浴 或者 shave.
Chandler: I got good. I played this game all 日 and now I rule. They should change the name to Ms. Chandler.
[pause]
Chandler: Although, I hope they don't.
Monica: Wait a minute, 你 staid 首页 all 日 playing Ms. Pacman, while I was at work like some kind of chump?
Chandler: Yeah, and I got all the 最佳, 返回页首 ten scores and erased Phoebe off the board. High five!
Monica: What is the matter with your hand?
Chandler: Well, I've been playing for like eight hours. It'll loosen up, come on check out the scores. Oh, and also look at the initials, their dirty words.
Monica: Chandler, why would 你 do that?
Chandler: Because it's awesome.
Monica: 你 think this is clever?
Chandler: Well, they only give 你 three letters, so after A.S.S., it is a bit of a challenge.
Monica: Wait a minute, this one's not dirty.
Chandler: Well, it is, when 你 put it together with that one.
Monica: Oh, well, if 你 don't clear this off, 你 wont be getting those from me. Ben's coming tomorrow over to play this game, this can't be there.
Chandler: Come on, he wont even know what they mean.
Monica: He's seven, not stupid.
Chandler: Have 你 talked to him lately?
Monica: All right, I'm just going to unplug it...
Chandler: No, no, no, if you'll unplug it, then there will be nothing to 显示 from my day. It would be like I was at work!
[Monica unplugs it]
Chandler: Look at that, look at that, it's still there, this thing must have a primitive ROM chip!
Monica: 你 gotta beat your scores.
Chandler: With the claw?
Monica: Fine, I'll do it. We gotta get this off the screen. Carol and Susan are still upset that 你 taught him "Pull my finger".
Chandler: Pull my finger... my hand is messed up!
Joey: I hate Pottery 谷仓 too! They kicked me out of there just because I sat on a bed.
Chandler: 你 took off your pants and cimbed under the sheets!
Phoebe: Hey. Why isn't it Spidermen? 你 know, like Goldmen, Silvermen.
Chandler: Because, it... it's not his last name.
Phoebe: It isn't?
Chandler: No. It's not like Phil Spidermen. He's a 蜘蛛 *man*. 你 know, like Goldmen is a last name but there's no 金牌 man.
Phoebe: Oh, oh okay...
Phoebe: There should *be* a 金牌 man!
Rachel: [Chandler has been left pantsless and handcuffed to Rachel's boss's desk. Rachel has grudgingly agreed to release him] 你 promise 你 will never see Joanna again.
Chandler: Never.
Rachel: 你 will never set foot in this office again.
Chandler: No.
Rachel: You'll give me back my Walkman.
Chandler: I prom... I never borrowed your Walkman.
Rachel: [pause] Well, then I 迷失 it, 你 buy me one!
Chandler: 你 got it! Come on!
Rachel: [unlocks cuffs. Chandler rubs wrists where cuffs were] Does it hurt?
Chandler: No, I just see guys doing this when they get cuffs taken off.
[runs over to office door where his pants are hanging]
Chandler: Hello, sweet pants!
Rachel: Wait a minute! How are 你 going to say 你 got out?
Chandler: I'll make something up. I'm good at lying. I actually did borrow your Walkman.
