Starting at a 晚餐 party at the Waldorf Penthouse for future stepfather Cyrus Rose, former best friend Serena 面包车, 范 der Woodsen, described as the most gorgeous girl in all of New York City, returns from her boarding school Hanover Academy in Hanover, New Hampshire. Blair, from the start, doesn't want to give up her spotlight as being the "most happening" girl in the room just yet. She and boyfriend Nate who have dated for about a 年 are in the middle of a passionate scene when Serena shows up, and entertains all the guests with stories about her wild summer adventures and what it was like...

1. Summer, Kind of Wonderful

Blair: The only thing lamer than dating Dan Humphrey... is mourning Dan Humphrey.

Blair: Damn that mother Chucker! He's totally right! I don't even like James!

Blair: Chuck is an awful person. He does awful things.

Blair: The true reason I should stay right where I am and not get in the car. Three words. Eight letters. Say it and I'm yours.

Blair: A hot lifeguard is like kleenex! Use once and throw away. 你 could ask for a better rebound!

Blair: I wasn't aware that robots got jealous. Did they update your software while I was away?

Blair: Oh, a honk instead of a knock!...