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Source: ekmilie
added by EllentheStrange
Source: 谷歌 image 搜索
added by EimieRose
posted by -Yusha-
Death came to a guy and said: "My friend today is your day."

Guy:"But I'm not ready!"
Then death said,"well your name is the 下一个 on my list".

Guy:"Okay why don't 你 take a 座位 and I will get 你 something to eat before we go?".

Then death said,"all right"
The guy gave death some 食物 with sleeping pills in it, death finished eating and fell into a deep sleep.

The guy took the 列表 and removed his name from the 最佳, 返回页首 of the 列表 and put it at the bottom of the list.

When death woke up he 说 to the guy, "Because 你 have been so nice to me, I will start from the BOTTOM of the 列表 ..."

Moral of the story: - Whatever is written in your destiny ... Will never change no matter how much 你 try!!
posted by invadercalliope
I wanna be the very best

Like no one ever was

To catch them is my real test

To train them is my cause

I will travel across the land

Searching far and wide

Teach Pokemon to understand

The power that's inside

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

It's 你 and me

I know it's my destiny

Pokemon!

Ooooh, you're my best friend

In a world we must defend

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all--

Our hearts so true

Our courage will pull us through

You teach me and I'll teach you

Pokemon!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Gotta catch 'em all!

Yeeaa.

Every challenge along the way

With courage I can face



To claim my rightful place

Come with me the time is right...
continue reading...
posted by jessicamc26
A stoner called the 火, 消防 department and said, "Come quick my house is on fire!" The Fireman asked "How do we get there?" The stoner says "DUH, the big red truck!"






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posted by sapherequeen
 :)
:)
I just want to take the time to thank everyone here who has known me, been on my side, is a 粉丝 of me, cares about me, etc. :)

I appreciate every single person here, and despite my being very moody at times, I will always care for those who feel the same towards me :D

I noticed that I've been very...unpleasant on 潮流粉丝俱乐部 towards some people, and I apologize for that. All I could say was that I was in the Darkest Time of my life, and it consumed me entirely. But now, that will change >:)

I am me again. I 爱情 and respect those who have always been there for me, were kind to me, are my fans, and appreciate each and every one of 你 for the rest of my life :)

I 爱情 你 all! Have a beautiful, wonderful 日 :D
 -LOL!-
-LOL!-
posted by KatiiCullen94
dear Alice.
i don't know why i say alice anymore, i think now i write these emails to myself, to secure me that 你 were real, that 你 all were , that he was.
There is evidence that 你 were here. and was my best friend. But sometimes i dont know wheither i was dreaming 或者 not, But i stop that thought to think again, if it was a dream and 你 diddnt exist,then how did i know your name, 或者 did i make 你 up, along with every one else. Maybe i'm going crazy, from without 你 i dont know. But i want to find out. Do 你 think a crazy person can be the one to digiosed themselves?? Lets hope for...
continue reading...
posted by twilight0girl
link

Nathan:
Dear Marni,
I am so sorry.
Can 你 forgive me for this?

Rotti:
Not the debt doctor
With the hungry scalpel!
Here's my prognosis:
Will they live...?

Hench Girls:
Doubtful.

Luigi:
Your the 街, 街道 physician
carving flesh sculptures!

Pavi:
Paint your 屁股 like rembrandt!
Ha! 你 Like-a that?!

Rotti:
Better start praying when 你 see him coming.

Luigi:
cause tonight its curtains!

Luigi, Pavi and Rotti:
Youre the night surgeon!

Chorus:
Remember who 你 are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember what 你 did to Marni.

Chorus:
Remember who 你 are.

Nathan:
I remember...

Genterns:
Remember...
continue reading...
added by youknowit101
Source: trollposts@tumblr
1)"Why, do 你 find me irresistible?"

2)"No, I just dress better than you"

3)"You're a double gay. No returnsies!"

4)"I 爱情 the 秒 grade insults, *insert name here*. Honestly, isn't it strange how "gay" has come to replace "stupid"? And so what if I was gay? Insulting my sexual orientation is pointless.

NOW...if a girl says you're gay, and 你 actually are, I find the best burn is: "At least I can get a boyfriend."

5)Look them in the face with a deadpan expression. Simply say, "Yes. I'm gay," and walk away. Take their thunder away. It's such a juvenile thing to say in the first place.
Or...
continue reading...
1. Guys hate sluts even though they have sex with them! (oh yeah..you're not "popular" if you've slept with 更多 than 5 guys..you're a HOE)

2. "Hey, are 你 busy?" 或者 "Are 你 doing something?" ~ two phrases guys open with to stop from stammering on the phone.

3... Guys may be flirting around all 日 but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

4. Before they call, guys try to plan out a little about what they're gonna say so there aren't awkward pauses, but once he's on the phone he forgets it all and makes it up as he goes.

5. Guys go crazy over a girl's...
continue reading...
posted by sakurahanazono
Alpha kenny body

1.)Write down on a piece of paper "Alpha kenny body" and get someone to read it. (it sounds like they're saying I'll fuck anybody xD)

I won a math debate

2.)Write down "I won a math debate" and once again get someone to read it. (It should sound like they're saying I want to masterbate xD)

Eye map ness

3.) Say: Eye
Spell: Map
Say: ness

Write this down on paper and 你 have to do as instructed on the left. (It sounds like they're saying I'm a penis xD)


Eye Emma rate hard

4.) write down "Eye emma rate hard" down on a piece of paper (it sounds like they're saying I'm a retard)

Eye M egg ay

5.) Say: Eye
Say: M
Say: egg
Say: ay

(It should sound like they're saying I am a gay xD)
1. Walk up to them and ask them for their autographs.
2. Walk up to them, introduce yourself extremely upbeat and friendly-like and end the conversation 由 saying "It was nice to meet you. It's so cool to talk to people outside of the asylum." Then walk away.
3. While walking down the street, in a mall 或者 any other such place, laugh out loud for no apparent reason. Be as creative with the way 你 laugh as 你 wish.
4. Run up to them, excitedly calling them Father, Mother, Aunt 或者 Uncle. If 你 dare, hug them.
5. While passing a 随意 stranger, stop and exclaim to them, "You have no idea!" in a...
continue reading...
added by loonybug
Source: tumblr
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: dumage
added by edwardcarlisle
Source: listal
added by ilovekud
Source: ilovekud
added by Shelly_McShelly
posted by karpach_14
Bored? Need something to spice up your day? Why not annoy the living shit out of someone 你 love? Here are a few suggestions.

1. Go to the library. Every 15 minutes, go up to the same guy and joke, "Working hard 或者 hardly working?"

2. At the dentist, start screaming as soon as 你 open your mouth.

3. Stand in front of the TV while your dad is watching a big game.

4. Every 30 分钟 或者 so, call your friend who is babysitting and breathe into the phone.

5. Scrape your ring 或者 your nails on the blackboard 下一个 time you're asked to do a problem at the board.

6. 下一个 音乐会 你 go to, yell out "Mmmbop!"...
continue reading...