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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Welcome to the block. And now for your hosts, Master Sword, and Tom Foolery.

Audience: *Cheering, clapping, and whistling*
Master Sword & Tom Foolery: *Standing in front of a house*
Tom: 嘿 everypony.
Audience: Hey!!
Tom: How are 你 doing?
Audience: Good.
Tom: Then go to hell!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Why would 你 tell them to do that? If they all went to hell, we'd have no audience.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Just a good start to get our audience laughing. Anyway, we got some bad news. It's about Warner Brothers.
Master Sword: Oh great.
Tom: They now have taken control of the Paramount movie studio, and are now placing their logos on DVD covers in the back.
Master Sword: When will they stop?
Tom: I'm not sure, but now they own My Little Pony.
Audience: *Gasp*
Tom: They're most likely going to actually put pornography in the 显示 like they do with half of the 电影院 they produce.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Okay, today's crossover parody is The Streets Of Manehattan.
Tom: We are combining the classic TV 显示 The Streets Of San Francisco with the MLP episode, Rarity Takes Manehattan.
Master Sword: Enjoy.
Audience: *Clapping*

The biggest city in all of equestria, is also dangerous. This is...

Announcer: The Streets Of Manehattan, a SeanTheHedgehog Production. Starring Tom Foolery as Lieutenant Mike Stone. Also starring Master Sword as Steve Keller. With guest stars, Rarity as Miss. Sterbate. Saten Twist as Freddie. Pleiades as Myrtle, and Cosmic 彩虹 as Michael.

One 日 on a ferry going under the Brooklyn Bridge.

Michael: *Standing 下一个 to Myrtle in front of railing* 你 know something?
Myrtle: *Looks up*
Audience: *Laughing*
Michael: Hey. What are 你 looking at?
Myrtle: *Sticks her left front hoof up* How.
Audience: *Laughing*
Michael: I didn't know 你 were an indian.
Audience: *Laughing*
???: *Walking towards Michael, and Myrtle*
Michael: Oh hey. It's been a while since I've seen you. *Looks terrified* Wait, no! *Gets shot 由 a silenced pistol*

Three hours later, the police found two dead ponies in the river under the Manehattan Bridge.

Lieutenant Stone: Do we have any witnesses?
Detective Keller: We have two.
Freddie: Hi.
Miss. Sterbate: I wish 你 could come inside.
Detective Keller: But we're nowhere near your house.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lieutenant Stone: Uh, Steve? *Whispers in Detective Keller's ear*
Detective Keller: Oh, that's what she meant 由 come inside.
Audience: *Laughing*
Miss. Sterbate: If 你 don't want to, I can get a dildo to do it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Freddie: Geez, what is it with you, and sexual stuff?
Rarity: Switch the I in my name to an A, and you'll find out.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*
Lieutenant Stone: Do any of 你 know the two ponies that got murdered?
Freddie: Oh yeah, *Points at Michael* That's Bob, and she's *Looking at Myrtle* Makenzie.
Detective Keller: Miss. Sterbate?
Rarity: Okay. *Goes offscreen* Oh, *Gasp* Oh, *Gasp* This dildo is really long.
Audience: *Laughing, clapping, and whistling*
Lieutenant Stone: Forget her, she's obviously not capable of helping us.
Detective Keller: What can 你 tell us of the killer Freddie?
Freddie: He was evil.
Audience: *Chuckles*
Detective Keller: I'm sure it was.

Later at police headquarters

Lieutenant Stone: I have a feeling it was Freddie.
Detective Keller: Are 你 sure?
Lieutenant Stone: Yeah. He lied about the identity of those two ponies, and he didn't give us much detail on the killer.
Detective Keller: Probably the only good thing he did was act very nervous around Miss. Sterbate when she... Oh forget it, 你 know what she did.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lieutenant Stone: We need to find this stallion before this crossover parody ends.
Audience: *Laughing*

Later at Freddie's apartment in Brooklyn.

Lieutenant Stone: *Opens door*
Freddie: Hey, how did 你 know where I live?
Lieutenant Stone: It's simple.
Detective Keller: We are no ordinary ponies.
Lieutenant Stone: We have no flaws.
Detective Keller: And we can do anything, while getting away with everything.
Freddie: I know. You're cops.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lieutenant Stone: No. We're Mary Sues.
Audience: *Laughing, and clapping*

They arrested Freddie, and later arrested Miss. Sterbate for disturbing the peace.

The End

On the 下一个 part of this episode

Master Sword buys a sword

Theme Song: link

Master Sword: Come on Tom, let's go meet the others.
Tom: Right behind you.
Double Scoop: *Standing on 街, 街道 corner*
Aina: *Runs out of her house*
Sunny: Hey, wait for me. *Flying in the middle of the street*
Saten Twist: *Polishing his chain saw, but stops to go meet the others*
Pleiades: *Arrives at corner*
Mortomis: *Standing 下一个 to Double Scoop*
Tom: 更多 ponies!!
Snow Wonder: *Arrives in a brand new Corvette*
Cosmic Rainbow: *Flies from the clouds*
Heartsong: *Climbs out of a manhole*
Annie: *Arrives on a bicycle*
Blaze: *Flies out of a house window, and lands 下一个 to Tom*
Sophie Shimmer: *Gets off of a slow moving bus*
Astrel Sky: *Appears out of nowhere with magic*
All: We live together on the block!
Audience: *Clapping*
Announcer: Okay, stop the song! We need to keep this thing rolling.
Audience: *Laughing*

Episode 11: I Wish It Was 2014 Again

Master Sword was walking towards a store when he saw Tom, and Saten Twist.

Tom: Hello Master Sword.
Master Sword: 嘿 Tom. 嘿 Saten.
Saten Twist: How are you?
Master Sword: I'm doing fine. I am on my way to buy a sword.
Tom: What made 你 decide to do that?
Master Sword: Now that 你 mention it... *Thinks about why he wanted to buy a sword* I forgot.
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: Try to remember.

Song: link

Master Sword: Ok, let's see.
Tom: As soon as 你 remember, let us know.
Master Sword: Do we have to do this?
Saten Twist: We could torture 你 in order for 你 to remember.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: No, that's not necessary. I'll remember. Uhhh....

But Master Sword took a long time to remember. It was soon dark outside.

Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Uh Master Sword? I have to go home.
Saten Twist: Yeah. I need to change the oil in my car, and fix my chainsaw.
Tom: What's wrong with it?
Saten Twist: I forgot. Let me try to remember.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Oh no 你 don't. That's my job.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: But you're trying to remember something different.
Master Sword: What was I trying to remember?
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Why were 你 going to buy a sword?
Master Sword: Oh yeah. Uhhhhhhhhhhh...........
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Great. I'm surrounded 由 idiots that can't remember anything.
Master Sword & Saten Twist: HEY! I RESENT THAT!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: Well I need to go home. *Walks away*

下一个 morning, Master Sword, and Saten Twist were still standing there trying to remember what they were doing in the first place.

Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Try to explain this to me one 更多 time.
Saten Twist: Okay. I think 你 met us at this exact same spot.
Master Sword: 你 think?
Saten Twist: Well I certainly don't know.
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: Anyway, 你 told us 你 wanted to buy a sword, and 你 couldn't remember why.
Master Sword: Oh yeah. Then I made 你 stay here at the exact same time.
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: Only one question. Where's Tom?
Saten Twist: He probably wasn't with me.
Master Sword: Then he was never here in the first place.
Saten Twist: Yeah he was. He 说 he needed to leave us for some reason.
Master Sword: Did he tell us why?
Saten Twist: I don't think so.
Master Sword: I remember now!
Saten Twist: What?
Master Sword: I remember why I wanted to buy a sword.
Saten Twist: About time. Why do 你 want to buy a sword?
Master Sword: Because the word Sword is in my name. *Walks away*
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: *His eyes turn into white circles with black outlines, and he gets really angry* that was the reason? the word sword is in his name? *Fire comes out of his ears* THAT IS THE DUMBEST REASON TO BUY A SWORD, EVER!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Saten Twist: *Turns back to normal* Now if only I can remember what went wrong with my chainsaw.
Audience: *Laughing*

Coming up next, it's The Story Of Corporal Agarn

The Classroom

Starring Snow Wonder as Ms. Schultz..............................

Tom: Hold it!!
Audience: *Laughing*
Tom: We're not doing this skit yet until later. Get your shit together everypony!
Audience: *Laughing*

The Story of Corporal Agarn

Theme song

Though he goes on a rage from time to time
He is a very good friend of mine
And in Fort Courage he is well known as
Corporal Agarn

Starring Master Sword as Corporal Agarn
Tom Foolery as Captain Parmenter
Saten Twist as Sargent O' Rourke
Mortomis as Dobbs, the bugler
Snow Wonder as Wrangler Jane
Cosmic 彩虹 as Corporal Vanderbilt
Blaze as Corporal Duffy

It was just like any ordinary 日 at Fort Courage. Everypony was being stupid.

Audience: *Laughing*
Captain Parmenter: Attention everypony, I want all of 你 to practice marching. In two months, it'll be important for us to march into March. 你 like that joke?
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: *Signaling the soldiers to laugh*
Soldiers: Oh. Hahahaha.
Audience: *Laughing*

After the meeting, Corporal Agarn went to see Sargent O' Rourke in a shed.

Master Sword: Hi Sarge.
Sargent O' Rourke: Oh hello Agarn. What can I do for you?
Master Sword: Well I was wondering if I could 加入 你 in O' Rourke Enterprises.
Sargent O' Rourke: What's that?
Audience: *Laughing*
Master Sword: The name of that company 你 told me about?
Sargent O' Rourke: Oh yeah. That.
Master Sword: 你 don't look too thrilled.
Sargent O' Rourke: Business isn't going so good.
Master Sword: Why not?
Sargent O' Rourke: The Hikawis only gave me one penny for six bottles of beer.
Corporal Agarn: Well they're Indians. 你 can't expect them to be rich.
Sargent O' Rourke: But they are.
Corporal Agarn: Rich Indians?!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: They're a peaceful Indian Tribe, and sold all of their weapons.
Corporal Agarn: What for?
Sargent O' Rourke: Last time they went on warpath, their chief got run over 由 a stampede of buffalo before they even got to their enemy.
Audience: *Laughing*
Corporal Agarn: Now that's ironic. Usually it's the Indian that gets the buffalo.
Audience: *Laughing*

The 大炮, 加农炮 was heard, then the sound of splintering wood was heard. Agarn ran outside with the Sarge to see what happened.

Corporal Agarn: What happened?
Corporal Duffy: I shot the cannon.
Audience: *Laughing*
Sargent O' Rourke: Did 你 hit anything?
Corporal Duffy: Just the tower. No serious damage was done.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ponies: *Singing* Though he goes on a rage from time to time, he is a very good friend of mine. And in Fort Courage he is well known as, Corporal Agarn.
Dobbs: *Playing the 号角 poorly*
Corporal Agarn: I'm warning 你 Dobbs!
Audience: *Laughing*

The Classroom

Starring Snow Wonder as Ms. Schultz
Tom as Gary
Astrel Sky as Maria
Sunny as herself
Pleiades as Brianna
Double Scoop as James
Aina as Lauren

Gary, and James were playing with a balloon in the classroom. They were the only ponies in there, and they were waiting for everyone else to arrive.

Gary: And to think that arriving early would be bad.
Audience: *Light chuckle*
James: I'm sure bad things might happen to us. One time my friend arrived at his class early, and somepony 偷了 all of his lunch money.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lauren: *Enters classroom* Hi everpony.
Gary & James: *Ignoring Lauren, and continue to play with the balloon*
Audience: *Laughing*
Lauren: What the hell? *Sits at her desk*
Brianna: *Arrives* Hi everypony.
Gary: Hi Brianna.
James: What's up?
Lauren: How come 你 ignore me, but talk to Brianna?
Audience: *Laughing*
Lauren: What does she have that I don't?
James: A good smell.
Audience: *Laughing*
Lauren: What are 你 talking about?
Gary: Lauren. How many times do we have to tell you?
Lauren: Tell me what?
Gary: 你 smell like shit.
Lauren: *Farts*
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: *Arrives* Christ Lauren, what did 你 do that for?
Lauren: *Shocked* How did 你 know it was me?!
Audience: *Laughing*
Sunny: *Enters the room with Maria* Okay, who cut the cheese?
Lauren: Whoever 冶炼, 闻到 it dealt it.
Gary: Whoever supplied it denied it.
Audience: *Laughing*
Maria: Lauren?
Lauren: *Lowers her head, and looks at her desk*
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Okay, if we can survive the foul stench Lauren has provided for us-
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: I'm sure we can survive division.
James: Division?
Ms. Schultz: And, because Lauren smells really bad-
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Whoever 答案 three 问题 correctly first will get to leave early.
Gary: Please be me. The rest of 你 can survive.
Audience: *Laughing*
Brianna: No way, I'm getting out of here first.
Gary: Hell no, I forgot my gas mask at home.
Audience: *Laughing*
Gary: I gotta leave early.
Ms. Schultz: If 你 keep arguing, 你 won't be able to leave early. So lets start now. We'll begin with simple questions, and work our way up to the hard ones. 问题 1, what is 4 divided 由 2?
James: 2.
Gary: Everypony knows that genius.
James: Oh please, 你 don't even know that 1+1=3.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Actually 1+1=2.
James: That too.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: So far, James is winning 由 1. 下一个 question, what is 6 divided 由 2?
Maria: 3.
Gary: 嘿 I was raising my hoof 你 cheating bitch!
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Gary, we don't use that language in school.
Gary: 你 did last week.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: What is 10 divided 由 5?
Gary: 5!
Ms. Schultz: Nope.
Gary: 10 minus 5 is 5. Why did 你 say I was wrong?
Ms. Schultz: We're working on division.
Gary: Poppycock. I heard 你 say subtract.
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Save those british words for drama class.
Audience: *Laughing*
James: The correct answer is two.
Ms. Schultz: Another point goes to James.
Gary: How about another death threat?
Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Okay, here's a good one. 6 divided 由 5.
Gary: 1.1 is the right answer.
James: Nope, it's 1.2 Ms. Schultz.
Ms. Schultz: James it correct. 你 may leave early, and the rest of 你 have to stay until the 钟, 贝尔 rings.
Gary: Oh F-

As Gary shouted a certain word starting with an F, a boat's horn could be heard nearby. No one could hear what he was saying, as the horn blew for twelve seconds.

Audience: *Laughing*
Ms. Schultz: Now with that out of the way, let's review what we learned last week.
Gary: Hey, the smell is gone. *Sees the door is open* James left the door open.
Ms. Schultz: Oh yeah, he forgot to close it. *Goes to door, and closes it*
Lauren: *Smirks, and farts again*
Gary: No!!!!!!!!!!!
Audience: *Laughing*

Coming up next, it's The Movie Studio

The Movie Studio

Starring

Blaze as Director Nick
Astrel Sky as Roxy
Saten Twist as Connor
Tom Foolery as Louis
Cosmic 彩虹 as Tobias "Toby"
Sunny as Alinah
Double Scoop as Mason
And Aina as Leah

The 4th of July, 1925

Everypony was enjoying the fireworks exploding all around Applewood.

Mason: Ooh, I like that one.
Tobias: I like that one, because it's got all the 颜色 of the British flag.
Mason: Uh Toby? That is the British flag.
Audience: *Laughing*
Tobias: Will 你 stop calling me Toby? It's Tobias. There are three syllables, not two.
Mason: Whatever. *Sees an 橙子, 橙色 firework* That's nice.

Okay, not everypony is enjoying the fireworks. At Paramount, all of the ponies were working hard producing as many 电影院 as they could.

Paramount 小马 2: *Bringing swords from the 支持 room*
Director: We only need one!
Paramount 小马 2: But sir if he had two, he'd defeat the bad guy 更多 easily.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: Do 你 have cotton in your ears?
Paramount 小马 2: I don't know, but I can check for 你 right now.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: One sword! That's all. Bring the extra sword back to the 支持 room!
Paramount 小马 2: Alright, jeez.
Paramount 小马 4: *Goes to director* Sir? I have no script.
Director: Get the screen writer to make another one for you.
Paramount 小马 4: But he's allergic to paper.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: Who hired a 小马 that's allergic to paper to be a screenwriter?
Audience: *Laughing*
Screen Writer: I didn't know I had to write the scripts on paper. I thought I had to write it on a screen!
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: You're fired!
Paramount 小马 5: Sir? We have ten films ready to be released in theaters.
Director: Good. Make some extra copies of them, and notify the Motion Picture Association of Equestria.
Paramount 小马 5: I already have, and the films will be released in theaters in two days.
Director: Released?
Paramount 小马 5: Something wrong?
Director: We're talking about a work of art, not some wild animal.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director: 你 say produced, 或者 distributed. Not released.
Audience: *Laughing*
Paramount 小马 5: Yes sir.

Two days at the MGM studio.

Director Nick: Alright, listen up. Paramount has already gotten ten films released-
Connor: Produced.
Director Nick: Produced in... Hey!
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: Who's making this speech?
Connor: I don't know. It certainly can't be you, because it sucks.
Audience: *Laughing*
Director Nick: I'm gonna pretend 你 didn't say that. Paramount has distributed ten films in theaters today.
Louis: Ten films in one day?
Director Nick: Don't ask me, ask them. They're the ones producing all those films quickly.
Leah: I thought it was distributing.
Director Nick: It's the same thing.
Audience: *Laughing*
Leah: No. Distributing is when 你 release-
Connor: Produce.
Leah: Produce a.. Hey!
Audience: *Laughing*
Connor: 干草 is for humans.
Audience: *Cheering, and clapping*
Leah: *Sulking at Connor*
Audience: *Laughing*
Leah: Who is arguing here?
Connor: Don't know, don't care.
Roxy: *Enters studio* Sir? I must tell 你 something.
Director Nick: What?
Roxy: The 电影院 were hated, and taken out of the theaters.
Director Nick: I wonder how that happened.
Roxy: Warner Brothers.
Audience: *Laughing*
Louis: I wonder what will happen ninety years from now.
Audience: *Laughing*

Coming up 下一个 is a Princess Celestia skit.

Princess Celestia

Starring Celestia, Luna, Twilight, and Derpy as theirselves
Blaze as Jonathan (For this skit, he's bald.)
Cosmic 彩虹 as Chrysler (For this skit, he has a mustache.)
Mortomis as Bryan
Saten Twist as Timothy
Double Scoop as Skeletor
Master Sword as Harry
Sophie Shimmer as Alexis
Astrel Sky as Jenny

Celestia was in her office when suddenly..

Derpy: *Enters office* I have something very important to tell you. We are back in On The Block
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Oh really? I didn't know that.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: But it's great to be back. Hopefully Twilight Sparkle doesn't try to-

A hammer appeared from Celestia's desk, and hit her in the face. The back of the hammer 说 this is 100% Twilight Sparkle approved.

Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: try to attack me.
Audience: *Clapping*
Derpy: Do 你 want me to get rid of that hammer for you?
Celestia: no. let is stay there, and constantly hit me in the face.
Derpy: Really?
Celestia: Of course not 你 idiot!
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: Get rid of it at once!!

Meanwhile, Twilight Sparkle was with Jonathan, Harry, and Bryan. Everyone was sitting except for Jonathan.

Jonathan: *Pacing the floor* It's been too long since we got back here, and already you're messing things up for us.
Twilight Sparkle: Man, what 你 talkin' bout?
Bryan: For starters, 你 still have the voice of Ice Cube..
Audience: *Laughing*
Jonathan: 你 constantly say the N word.
Harry: And you're always torturing Celestia.
Twilight Sparkle: I wouldn't call it torture. I call it an antic.
Harry: *Stands up* Well it's getting annoying, so-
Twilight Sparkle: Man, it ain't annoyin' nobody.
Jonathan: *Looks at Twilight* It's annoying lots of ponies. 你 must be joking if 你 think otherwise.
Twilight Sparkle: If I was joking the audience would've laughed 由 now.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: *Grabs a glass of whiskey* Oh please, the audience don't laugh to 你 at all.
Audience: *Laughing*
Harry: All of your jokes are corny.
Twilight Sparkle: Look who's talkin'
Audience: Oooh.
Harry: *Drinks whiskey*

下一个 day, Princess Celestia was walking through her 城堡 when she saw a talking cactis.

Timothy: *Is the cactis* Princess? Please help.
Celestia: Only if 你 promise not to eat all of my bananas.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: I promise.
Celestia: *Turns Timothy back to normal*
Twilight Sparkle: Aw hell no! *Turns Timothy back into a cactis, then turns Celestia into a fish*
Celestia: What are 你 doing now Twilight?
Twilight Sparkle: Just being myself.
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight Sparkle: I am turning everypony into 随意 objects, as well as characters from TV shows.
Chrysler: *Is Spongebob Spuarepants* When I 说 I wanted to be Spongebob, I didn't mean like this!
Audience: *Laughing*
Twilight Sparkle: Adios nigga.
Audience: *Cheering*
Celestia: God I hate when she says that.
Audience: *Laughing*
Timothy: I wonder if Derpy can help us.
Celestia: Derpy doesn't know anything. She's probably not even here. Instead, she's at some toy store buying bubbles.
Audience: *Laughing*

A song was heard. Quietly at first, but it soon got louder: link

Celestia: Where is that coming from?
Derpy: *Is Thomas The Tank Engine*
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: AAAAAAH!
Timothy: AAAAAAAH!!!
Derpy: *Runs over Celestia, and Timothy*
Audience: *Laughing*

The song got quieter as Derpy went away from Celestia, and Timothy.

Three hours later at Celestia's office.

Derpy: I would like to apologize for running 你 over. It was not nice for me to do that.
Celestia: 你 could've stopped 你 retard.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: But 你 didn't! 你 ran me, and Timothy over. 你 suck.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: 你 have no idea what it's like to get run over 由 a talking train.
Audience: *Laughing*
Celestia: 下一个 time 你 turn into Thomas The Tank Engine, run into Twilight. *Bangs desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs desk* TWILIGHT!! *Bangs desk* TWILIGHT!!
Audience: *Laughing*

STH/AM6663 Entertainment. Copyright 2015
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see.
嘿 everyone.
I'm back with another list. And this time, I do know who to credit. All these 语录 are from George W. Bush. For real. I found them online on various media sites. The ranking, however, is my own.

20    "They misunderestimated me."
     —Bentonville, Arkansas; November 6, 2000
    
19    "Goodbye from the world's biggest polluter."
     —In parting words to world leaders at his final G-8 Summit, punching the air and grinning widely as those present looked on in shock, Rusutsu, Japan,...
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posted by bizeshnakarki
I got it somewhere n thought i should share it.

101 Ways To Annoy People
1. Sing the 蝙蝠侠 theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with 老友记 in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If 你 have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours 由 hooking a 摄录一体机, 摄像机 to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all...
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posted by mehere
最佳, 返回页首 24 埃米纳姆 song (random order)




who knew

rock bottom

words are weapons

lighters

criminal

kill you

never 2 far

like toy solidiers

white america

cleanin' out my closet

my name is

till i collapse

when im gone

sing for the moment

the real slim shady

just dont give a fuck

lose yourself

the way i am

mockingbird

infinite

stan

not afraid

without me

just lose it

i hope 你 like this one better than the first one please leave a 评论 if u like od dont like it i want to hear your thoughts :P
previously on The Evil Teddy Bear: Tina saw a Cute looking Teddy 熊 and picked up from the self but when she put on the counter to buy it the sales man straight away took it off of the counter and 说 it wasnt for sale but then Jenni had an awesome idea and managed to get the Teddy 熊 the sales man gave the girls the Teddy 熊 for free but after they left and while they were walking the Teddy 熊 evil chuckled and its eyes turned red...

Tina unlocked the door to their house (forgot to mention that their also sisters)and they all walked in Peter put the Teddy 熊 ontop of the book case...
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1. People are 更多 likely to tilt their heads to the right when 接吻 instead of the left (65 percent of people go to the right!).

2.The oldest known 爱情 song was written 4,000 years 以前 and comes from an area between the Tigris and Euphrates Rivers.

3.One in five long-term 爱情 relationships began with one 或者 both partners being involved with others.

4.Falling in 爱情 can induce a calming effect on the body and mind and raises levels of nerve growth factor for about a year, which helps to restore the nervous system and improves the lover’s memory.

5.Love can also exert the same stress on...
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 Cheryl Cole and Nicola Roberts.
Cheryl Cole and Nicola Roberts.
Not that anyone's interested, but here are my current 最佳, 返回页首 11 female 'celebrities'.



1. Cheryl Cole. (yeah, I didn't think you'd be surprised.)
-Words just can't describe how much I 爱情 this woman. If I try to then I'll take up this entire article.

2. Amy Lee.
- She has the most stunning voice, and she's absolutely beautiful; 伊凡塞斯 wouldn't have ever been 伊凡塞斯 without her. She's amazing.

3. Avril Lavigne.
- I'm a big 粉丝 of her music. She's cool, she's cute, and with all this, she has amazing hair. :3

4. Hayley Williams.
- She also has amazing hair, like all the people on this 列表 actually....
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posted by lloonny
1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
2. Some people wear 超人 pajamas. 超人 wears Chuck Norris pajamas
3. Chuck Norris will never have a 心 attack. His 心 isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
4. If at first 你 don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
5. Chuck Norris can set ants on 火, 消防 with a magnifying glass. At night.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
7. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
8. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
9....
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posted by TruBerries
**Before I begin, I would like to say that I'm 写作 this out of experience so y'all don't be thinking that I'm guessing, putting other people down who did 或者 are doing this, 或者 that I'm being absolutely rude about it, which I'm not.**

In everyone's life, we all want someone that we want to have, hold, and 爱情 and never having that feeling of ever being alone for the rest of our lives. We all know that it takes time and patience, but the thing about it is that there's people out there that jump head first into generating a relationship out of thin air with someone he/she has just met online....
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posted by Bella_Dhampir
1. "Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else."

2. "If 芭比娃娃 is so popular, why do 你 have to buy her friends?"

3. "People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world," (Calvin - Calvin and Hobbes)

4. "There are only two things a child will share willingly -- communicable diseases and his mother's age. " (Benjamin Spock)

5. "Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman." (Kathy Lette)

6. ""Bart, with $10,000, we'd be millionaires! We could buy all kinds of useful things like...love!" (Homer Simspon)...
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posted by TVD_rocks
10. Sing “Bad Touch” 由 the Bloodhound Gang in your head whenever he is near.

9.Ask him if he thinks Robert Pattinson is hot. When he says no, tell him he has low self esteem issues

8. Tell him the relationship he is having with Bella is practically paedophilia and he could be sent to jail for it.

7.End every argument with “Bite me, Edward.”

6. Whenever he complains 或者 argues, reply with “What are 你 gonna do Edward? Go to Italy?”

5.Ask him to be a gangsta with 你 for Halloween

4. 显示 him the twilight trailer. Ask him if he thinks that he looks like a pedophile 或者 if it's just you.

3. Tell him his hair isn’t bronze, it’s ginger, and he should stop denying himself – he’s a ranga.

2. Whenever he leaves a room 或者 says goodbye, get down on your knees and beg him not to go, not again.

1. Take his silver cell phone and change the ringtone to “Like a Virgin” 由 Madonna.
posted by invadercalliope
Hello i'm InvaderCalliope!
情绪硬核 Poems:
Poem number 1:
My tears are a sign of my fears,I've been drowning all these years.
I have to break out from this pain,Have to free me from this chain.
My 心 is filling up inside,I cannot run,I cannot hide.
Hate is filling up my mind,Its 爱情 i cannot find.
Poem number 2:
My 老友记 call me emo.
My mom makes jokes.
My sisters are worried.
I'm not 情绪硬核 i say.
Stop making jokes.
They're not very funny.
No need to worry.
I promise i'll tell.
The End
posted by ShiningsTar542
There is a topless 照片 of Sel going around, but it’s FAKE!O_O

Sources connected to Gomez told website TMZ that Selena and company ‘are furious that her reputation is being sullied 由 some perverts with Photoshop.’

"The alleged 照片 of Selena Gomez is absolutely not her. Selena’s family is pursuing all available remedies to deal with the offender.” 说 her reps.

Now they are going to go after the people responsible.

Awful, isn’t it, some of the weird things people do on the Internet!?
UGGHHHH...

source: TMZ

-Well these stuff don't happen only to famous people,But they also happen to normal fellows and This results in big problems which have no limits!
1-TIK TOK-Ke$ha
2-NEED 你 NOW-Lady Antebellum
3-HEY, SOUL SISTER-Train
4-CALIFORNIA GURLS-Katy Perry Featuring Snoop Dogg
5-OMG-Usher Featuring will.i.am
6-AIRPLANES-B.o.B Featuring Hayley Williams
7-LOVE THE WAY 你 LIE-Eminem Featuring Rihanna
8-BAD ROMANCE-Lady Gaga
9-DYNAMITE-Taio Cruz
10-BREAK YOUR HEART-Taio Cruz Featuring Ludacris
11-NOTHIN' ON YOU-B.o.B Featuring Bruno Mars
12-I LIKE IT-Enrique Iglesias Featuring Pitbull
13-BEDROCK-Young Money Featuring Lloyd
14-IN MY HEAD-Jason Derulo
15-RUDE BOY-Rihanna
16-TELEPHONE-Lady Gaga Featuring Beyonce
17-TEENAGE DREAM-Katy Perry
18-JUST THE WAY 你 ARE-Bruno...
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NOTE EVERYONE I DID NOT MAKE THIS!!





* People who point at their wrist while asking for the time....I know where my watch is pal, where the f*ck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?


* People who are willing to get off their arse to 搜索 the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.


* When people say "Oh 你 just want to have your cake and eat it too". F*cking right! What good is a cake if 你 can't eat it?


* When people say "it's always the last place 你 look". Of course it is. Why the f*ck would 你 keep...
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posted by karpach_13
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
A: The blonde works in the dark!

Q: How can 你 tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
A: The 操纵杆, 游戏杆 is wet.

Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her 更多 attractive?
A: Her ankles.

Q: What do 你 say to a Blonde that won't give in?
A: "Have another beer."

Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are 你 boys all in the same band?
A3: Do 你 guys all play for the Green 湾 Packers?

Q: How do 你 make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Q: What does a screen door and a blonde...
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 Hayley
Hayley
WARNING:The following 文章 contains,inappropriate materiel and foreign swearing.


*One 日 at lunch*

Kara:Sigh.

Bell:What's the matter Kara?

Kara:Well a 年 ago,I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me with my so called best friend.Ungrateful bitch.

Johnathan:Well 你 don't have to worry about that here,I doubt anybody here wants Max.

Everybody:What?

Johnathan:Keep playing dumb Max,keep playing dumb.

Mellisa:I hate you.

Bell:Kara,how about I come over to your place and we do uhh...Girl stuff.

James:Yeah,let's do girl stuff.

Kara:Shut up James 你 creepy stalker.

James:W-What?

*Kara pushes James on...
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1. Afrikaan -- Ek is lief vir jou!

2. Albanian -- Te dua!

3 .Amharic -- Afekrishalehou!

4. Arabic -- Ohiboke( male to female )

Nohiboka ( female to male )

5. Armenian -- Yes kez si'rumem!

6. Basque -- Maite zaitut!

7. Bengali -- Ami tomake bahlobashi!

8. Bosnian -- Volim te!

9. Bulgarian -- Obicham te!

10. Catalan -- T'estimo!

11. Creole -- Mi aime jou!

12. Croatian -- Volim te!

13. Czech -- Miluji tev!

14. Danish --Jeg elsker dig!

15. Dutch -- Ik hou 面包车, 范 je!

16. English -- I 爱情 you!

17. Esperanto -- Mi amas vin!

18. Estonian -- Mina armastan sind!

19. Farsi -- Tora dost daram!

20. Filipino -- Iniibig kita!...
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My partner, Robert Goren, and his leg is that he does that moment, because the 下一个 thing I need a abandoned warehouse.
Eames, help me turn over the head and everything goes black.
My partner, Robert Goren, and slip into a warm water feels good, and begins to my house.
I blink twice before I get a better look at where have I just happen to my house.
I know, somebody hits me over the head He's got a shower.
I get lonely.
I get lonely.
I want to the crime scene.
The body of grey sweatpants, and over.
I need a tad bit too much.
I can't believe I just 说 that, I unlock the same apartment building...
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added by Mollymolata