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1.We are men we like sex.......it is like a constant dog barking at the gate, we leash this dog in a relationship and give 你 the key.....if 你 dont feed, water, and give the dog a 首页 he might break out....with this basic knowledge 你 can begin understanding men
2.Those cooments that 你 gossip and say we are soo cruel and misunderstanding.......we have a very weird sensor most things 你 are offended 由 we think we are complimenting you....
3.We dont mind going shopping with you, but there are rules.
A.dont drag us around like 狗 holding your bags and not give us a reward.....atleast contemplate a spontaneous erotic adventure in a changing room.
B.If 你 make us sit outside the changing room holding your purss, never expect us to come shopping again....that is if we are still there when 你 come out.......
C.take us into the dressing room with you, trust me we dont mind having to watch 你 strip down and put clothes on.....we may offer to help taking some things off.
4.We dislike having backseat drivers, the examiner for the driving test was about 30seconds from having road rash for most of us....
5.We like video games, dont hate.....we wouldnt mind if 你 practiced while we are gone so we can have that dream of a cool girlfriend thats good at CoD........If 你 want our attention with out grabbing a remote and joining 你 might need to shed a few layers.....
6.We like having surprise naked 照片 of yourself sent to us.....the naughtier the better.
7.If 你 cant cook but 你 insist on us eating the .....matter.....you have produced try wearing an apron.......just and apron....we wont notice the 食物 we will be too busy trying to think of the 1 in a million ways to get 你 on 最佳, 返回页首 of us w/ 或者 w/o the apron....
8.We dont mind chick flicks but there are some rules...
A.you must never tell our 老友记 或者 anyone who knows our friends.
B.you must compensate us 由 watching an action movie, 或者 compensation with sexual acts...
C.if 你 are bored 由 our movie please go ahead and play with our dog.....
9.WE CANT READ YOUR MINDS!!!Idk why but no woman believes this.....it is true if 你 dont instigate something 或者 tell us to unleash the dog inside 你 we wont know! so for God's sake please tell us 或者 drag us we wont care 你 could rip our clothes of and say thats mine and have your way.....
10.Whilest still upon the subject we enjoy being told what 你 want! because we cant read your minds.......so tell us where,when,and how hard 你 want it......
11.We dont mind being woke up in the middle of the night 或者 in the morning 由 你 but if 你 expect us to stay awake id suggest 你 either be on 最佳, 返回页首 of us, grooming the dog, 或者 sitting on our face.........not in the smothering way either!
12.Every guy has been trying to go green since indooor plumbing was invented so please save the planet and 淋浴 with us so we dont waste water.....
13.Being spontaneous is a good thing try it....if your man shuts 你 down trying to go down, 或者 play with the dog......i think his gender will disown him.
14.Haircuts..........lets be honest due to the fact we are normally staring at your chest 或者 your butt, we may need a little extra time to notice the haircut.
15.Ladies there is only one time we wont consider it cheating if your having sex with another person.........it is when it is yourself, your boyfriend and another woman...........
16.When we 太空 out we are probably fantasizing about 你 doign things we want but 你 dont.....so dont be offended when we keep asking for them.....
17.We 爱情 getting compliments so tell us the dog is growing 或者 something, whether its true 或者 not.....
18.We are all kinky so any ideas 你 have spit them out because we might have been wanting to ask 你 to do that for months...
19.True fact women look good naked.........so stop worrying about how 你 look......because we like it....
20.No man would complain if he came 首页 and saw 你 naked, playing with youself, 或者 in a sexy outfit.
21.Dont complain to us about your shoes.........honestly does one pair matter if 你 have 50.....we have prolly 4 或者 5.....
22.Whatever,fine,or i get it........are not good ways to end a discussion...
23.Dont smoke.............nuff said...
24.We are not made to be used as pawns in a game with your other girlfriends......
25.We dont mind if 你 come to 床, 床上 naked so dont worry about having to pick which pjs to wear each night......
26.We are a proud species we like to have our backs rubbed litterally and figurativly....
27.We like knowing where 你 are because we worry about 你 not because we are controlling...
28.If 你 text us then drop off the face of the earth we assume the worst and will go on a rampage untill 你 text us again.....
29.Blue balls is the leading cause of death of relationships....
30.If we start sharing our feeling...blehh.....and 你 laugh 或者 make a joke.....dont ever expect it to happen again even if 你 are in lingerie....
added by Jeffersonian
posted by TVD_rocks
from the internet :)



1. Make race car noises when anyone gets on 或者 off.

2. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that
this is your "personal space."

3. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all
of 你 just shut UP!"

4. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

5. Sell Girl Scout cookies.

6. On a long ride, sway side to side at the natural frequency of the elevator.

7. Shave.

8. Crack open your 公文包 或者 purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in
there?"

9. Offer name 标签 to everyone...
continue reading...
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