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posted by Seanthehedgehog
It's the 11th Con Mane story, and it begins in Berlin Germany. Con's best friend Fenix Lighter, an agent for the German Secret Service, M.I.3 is on his way to a marriage. Con, and another 小马 is with him, until they run into trouble....

I was actually typing that while listening to the 星, 星级 wars theme song! 哈哈

Fenix: Are we almost there? How do I look?
Con: Relax Fenix.
German pony75: *flies near them*
German pony23: 嘿 look, there's a message.
Con: *reads it* Follow me.
German pony23: *follows*
German pony75: *lands*
Fenix: *gets out* What the fuck happened?
German pony75: Sanchez escaped, he's at the airport.
Con: Hang on, I'll be right back. *teleports to airport*
Sanchez: We have an intruder!!
Russians: *shoot at Con*
Con: *take cover*
Sanchez: Is the bike ready?
Russian pony53: Yeah, move!!
Sanchez: *rides away*
Con: *gets back to car* Everypony in now!
Germans: *get in car*
Con: *teleports on highway* Sanchez is on a green EMW
German pony23: I'm on it! *drives car*
Sanchez: *weaves through traffic*
German pony23: I see him!
Con: Alright, keep driving. I'm getting on the roof! *gets on roof*
German pony23: *drives faster*
Con: *gets rope*
Sanchez: What the?!
Con: *ties up Sanchez*
Sanchez: *falls off bike*
Con: I got him!
Fenix: He got him!!
German pony23: Wunderbar, but we won't get to the wedding on time!
Con: Oh yes we will! *teleports them to wedding*
Bride: Fenix, where did 你 come from?
Fenix: Magic, what are we all waiting for? Let's start this!
Germans: Ja. *arrest Sanchez*

This is just the beginning of

License To Murder

Starring
Doughtnut Joe..............................Con Mane
Mr. Sanchez.................................Himself
Cranky Doodle Donkey................Dario
Roseluck......................................Fenix's wife
Fenix Lighter................................Himself
彩虹 Dash.............................Rain Bouvier
Pinkie Pie.....................................P
Vinyl Scratch...............................Tara
Spike............................................S
Lyra Heartstrings..........................Moneybit
Germans......................................Good guys
Russians.......................................Bad guys

Cars provided 由

Marecedez
EMW
Dodge
Chevronet
PMC
Ponybilt
Vriendscoupe
Lunicorn

The night after the marriage was when the ponies were partying.

Con: Congrats Fenix.
Fenix: Danke my friend. Me, and Roseluck have a gift for you.
Roseluck: It's a cigarette lighter.
Con: Oh wow. Thanks 你 two.
Roseluck: *grabs flower* He loves me,
Fenix: Come on, of course I 爱情 you.
Con: I have to go *gets in car*
Roseluck: Con wait!
Con: *drives off*
Roseluck: Is he ok?
Fenix: He was married once, but that was a long time ago.

At the Berlin jail

Sanchez: *playing harmonica*
Copper 43: Shut up!
Sanchez: Fine.
Russians: *storm in jail* Where's Sanchez?!
Warden: I'm not telling you!
Russians: *kill warden* Let's find his cell.
Coppers: *shoot two russians*
other three russians: *kill coppers* Let's go Sanchez *busts down door*
Sanchez: Thanks 你 three. Let's get out of here A.S.A.P. I have somepony to visit.

Back at Fenix's place

Fenix: *hears car pull into driveway* Con?
Russians: *K.O. Fenix*
Roseluck: Fenix?! What's happening?!
Russians: Shut up! *slap Roseluck*

The russians kidnapped Fenix, and took him to a warehouse

Fenix: What is this?
Russian pony65: We're making 你 pay for what you've done!
Fenix: What are 你 talking about?
Sanchez: 你 sent me to jail, remember?
Fenix: No! I don't
Sanchez: That's great... kill him
Russians: *open trap doors*
Fenix: *falls in water*
Sharks: *eat Fenix*
Fenix: AAAAAAAAHHHHH! nien, nien- AAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Con was at the airport about to make his way back to Canterlot when...

German pony23: *walks into airport*
Con: I'd like one ticket to Canterlot, Equestria.
german pony88: Sure.
German pony23: Con, come over here, quick!
Con: I have to go!
German pony88: But, your ticket!
Con: What is it?
German pony23: Fenix has gone missing, and his wife is beat up badly!
Con: Let's go then.

They arrived at Fenix's house

Con: Wait here, I'll be right back.
Roseluck: Con!
Con: Roseluck, what happened?
Roseluck: Some russians came here, and kidnapped Fenix, then brought his body back here.
Con: *spots body* There's a note.

He disagreed with something that ate him

Con: I think he's still breathing.
Roseluck: He's still alive? Oh thank celestia!
Con: I gotta go find those sick bastards that killed Fenix. Who was it?
Roseluck: Sanchez, and his ponies.
Con: Great, where are they now?

3 hours later at a bar near some water

Con: *rides 船, 小船 to bar*
Waiter: Hello sir, can I tie up your 船, 小船 for you?
Con: Sure. Is there somepony here named Rain Bouvier?
Waiter: Oh yeah, she's a blue pegasus with a 彩虹 mane. Can't be too hard to spot her.
Con: Right, thanks *walks into bar*

20 秒 later

Con: Are 你 Rain Bouvier?
Rain: Yeah, what's it 2 ya?
Con: I am Mane. Con Mane, my best friend Fenix Lighter works for the same organization 你 do, and Sanchez's gang nearly killed him.
Rain: Who do 你 work for Con? Are 你 a spy?
Con: Yeah, for the C.I.E.
Rain: Well I think we can work together.
Con: Good.
Dario: *walks in bar*
Rain: Oh damnit!
Con: What is it?
Rain: It's Sanchez's right hand man, Dario.
Con: And he's brought company.
Waitress: 嘿 there, anything I can get you?
Con: Two beers, that's all.
Waitress: Alrighty, coming right up.
Dario: Good evening Miss Bouvier.
Rain: Hi Dario. I see 你 brought company.
Dario: Seven russians. 你 can't escape this time.
Con: You've tried to catch her before?
Dario: Mind your business, but I will tell 你 I've tried to catch her 41 times!
Con: Wow.
Rain: Waitress!
everypony: *puts away weapons*
Waitress: Here 你 go *puts tray on table* That'll be $3.50. Anything I can get for your friends?
Russian captain: Let me get it *heads toward Con*
Con: *K.O's captain* He's had enough, thank you.
Waitress: Oh, um ok *walks away*
Rain: How did 你 get here?
Con: 由 boat.
Rain: Where is it?
Con: Behind that 墙 *attacks Dario*
dario: Now!!
Russians: *head toward Rain*
Rain: *grabs shotgun* Eat this *shoots two russians*
Russian leiutenant: *runs toward Rain*
Con: *K.O's leiutenant*
Rain: Thanks.
Dario: *grabs Rain*
Rain: *flips Dario over*
Russians: *grab swordfish*
Con: *dodge fish*
Russians: Charge!!! RRAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!!
Con: *dodges fish*
Russians: again! RRAAAAAAAAAAAGH!!!! *hit Con*
Rain: *K.Os russians*
Con: Touche
Dario: *grabs Rain's shotgun*
Rain: *hits Dario, and shoots hole in wall* Get it started.
Con: *runs to boat*
Rain: *walks slowly to hole*
Con: *starts boat*
Rain: *flies to boat*
Con: *drives boat*
Dario: *shoots Rain*
Rain: Ah! *falls on floor*
Con: *shoots at Dario*

They got away, but the 船, 小船 ran out of gas after their escape

Con: Well this is great.
Rain: You're a unicorn. Can't 你 make the engine run without gasoline?
Con: Can't 你 learn how to die? How did 你 survive getting shot?
Rain: Flak jacket.
Con: Oh, cool.
Rain: Yeah.
Con: So where are we heading now?
Rain: I don't know, but I'm sure we've got time for a little something. *grabs Con*
Con: I see where this is going *kisses Rain*
Rain: *kisses Con*

Con & Rain went to a city called svoboda. Mr. Sanchez was there, and had plans to continue his business, but what was it?

Con: We need to know what we're dealing with, but first, gambling! *sits at poker table*
Rain: Of course!
Dealer: Hello, how may I help you?
Con: I shall put in $50 for chips.
Dealer: Ok. *deals cards*
Rain: How is this going to get us information about Sanchez?
Con: Oh don't worry, it will *takes cards*

In Canterlot

P: Where is Con?! He was suppsed to be here 8 hours ago! WHERE IS HE?!!?
S: How should I know? Moneybit, do 你 know?
Moneybit: Let me check his tracking device.
Con: Oh crap, hold on *turns off tracking device*
Moneybit: Shit!
S: What is it?
Moneybit: I only saw it for a second, but I'm sure he's in Svoboda.
S: *grabs bag* Well then I must get him.
P: Take me with you!
S: Take this *throws watch* 你 can talk to him when I find him.
P: ok *hops to kitchen*

Back to Svoboda

Con: I see your $20, and raise 你 $30!
Rain: You're going all in?! Are 你 insane?
Con: No, I'm a winner
Dealer: And the $350 goes to Con Mane.
Con: What did I tell you? I'm a winner.
Rain: Good job. Now that 你 got us 更多 money, what should we do?
Con: Let's not talk about the money, and get a hotel room. We'll need to stay here for a few days.

Upstairs in a secret room

Sanchez: Who was that 小马 who won the entire pot?
Russian pony67: I don't know, but I do know he was with Rain Bouvier.
Sanchez: Rain Bouvier is here?!?
Russian pony67: That is what I just said, yes.
Sanchez: Well then we have to get her to tell us who she's hanging out with. He could also be in her organization! Tara! Get over here!!
Tara: What do 你 want?
Sanchez: I want 你 to go find a 彩虹 maned pegasus, and find out what 你 can about her friend.
Tara: I don't work for you, I live with you.
Sanchez: Shut up! 你 do exactly what I say if 你 don't wanna get whipped.
Tara: Fine, I'll do it!

After 40 分钟 of doing uh, stuff.. Con & Rain went to play 更多 poker.

Con: I'll let 你 play this time.
Rain: I don't know if I can win.
Con: Nonsense, 你 hate losing right?
Rain: Right.
Con: So why can't 你 win?
Rain: Fine, I'll do it. *sits at table*
Waiter: Can I get anypony something?
Con: I'll have a milkshake, stirred, not shaken.
Waiter: Very well.
Tara: Excuse me sir.
Con: What do 你 want?
Tara: I was wondering if 你 could help me with something.
Con: No *walks back to table*
Dealer: Hey, is there somepony named Con Mane?
Con: That's me, why?
Dealer: Someone called, and 说 he was a friend of yours. He's in your hotel room.
Rain: I won!
Con: Perfect, cuz we have to go now. *runs*
Rain: What is it?
Con: Somepony might be trying to kill us!

At the hotel room

Con: *grabs gun* Wait here until I tell 你 to.
Rain: Ok
Con: *walks toward door, rams into it, and pushes S on the floor*
S: Really 0007!
Con: S?! What the fuck are 你 doing here? I might have killed you!
S: Well I'm on leave! I thought I'd stop by, and see how 你 were getting along.
Con: *helps S up* Are 你 alright?
S: Yes, of course.
Con: How'd 你 find me?
S: Moneybit of course, she's worried sick about you.
Con: Look S, this is no place for you. Go home.
S: Don't say that 0007, I know exactly what you're up to, and quite frankly you're gonna need my help. Remember, if it hadn't been for the S branch, 你 would've been dead long ago.
Rain: Is everything ok?
Con: It's fine, just my quartermaster.
Rain: He's a baby dragon.
S: Yeah, problem? Because if there is, I can kill 你 easily.
Con: Flak jacket, 或者 not.
Rain: Right, uh... What are 你 doing here?
S: Giving 0007 his equipment.
Rain: Who's 0007?
Con: I am, that's what they call me anyway.
S: Exactly, now where were we?
Con: 你 wanted to 显示 me some stuff?
S: Oh yes, four clips of ammo for your Nambu pistol. A pen that shoots poisonous darts, grenades, and a rifle.
Con: A Kar98k, interesting.
S: It's not just a Kar98 rifle, hold this part with your right hoof
Con: *holds it*
S: Now hold it with your left
Con: *holds it*
S: Now you're the only one that can use it.
Rain: 你 说 he was your quartermaster?
Con: Yes he is.
S: And I hope 你 don't mind, but I'm staying with you, even if I get fired for it.
Con: Alrighty then. 你 can stay.
S: YAY!!!!

Con, and his 老友记 found out that Mr. Sanchez smuggled drugs out of Svoboda into other places in the world, and the way he did it, was illegal.

Sanchez: *drives past S*
S: Rain, do 你 copy?
Rain: I copy. What's the skinny?
S: Sanchez is in a convoy with two sedans, and a bus.
Rain: An actual bus?!
S: No, just a Vriendscoupe bus.
Rain: Oh, thank god.
Con: She's not used to cars. Just flying.
S: I'll keep that in mind.
Rain: *flies above cars*
Con: Why are 你 carrying me again?
Rain: So we can go over the plan. We'll be disguised as tourists, and then we infiltrate Sanchez's plan.
Con: Great.
Rain: We're here.
Con: Thank god, I felt like 你 were going to drop me the entire time.
Sanchez: Welcome my visitors. How is everypony today?
Con: Good.
Sanchez: Excellent, because 你 will be 给 a tour of my drug facility.
Rain: Aw yeah.
Sanchez: Helping me with the tour is my right hand man, and a donkey, Dario.
Dario: Hello, follow me.
Tourists: *follow*
Dario: Here is where we load our drugs into trucks. They're all tankers so that no one can find out what it is.
Sanchez: They'll all think it's gasoline, so they won't bother to look inside.
Tourists: Ooh *take down notes*
Dario: Now if 你 walk up these stairs, you'll see the drugs go directly into our trucks. It's awesome, isn't it?
Rain: Soo awesome
Dario: Don't get too excited, there is still 更多 to be looked at inside this room.
Con: (I'll bet, which is something I'm really good at)
Dario: Now that we're inside, let us 显示 你 something. Since 你 all decided to not only visit, but buy our drugs, we'll deliver it to 你 once 你 get back to your homes.
Sanchez: And you'll get a souvenir as well. *sets paper on fire* A free paper shredder. This is actually a glass cylinder with some of the drugs you'll recieve.
Con: *throws cylinder*
Sanchez: THE BUILDING IS ON FIRE!!! RUN!
Tourists: *running*
Dario: *hits Con*
Sanchez: *grabs gun*
Rain: *hits Sanchez*
Con: *grabs rifle*
Dario: *grabs rifle* Why won't this shoot?!
Con: Cuz it's mine *takes rifle*
Dario: *pushes Con onto conveyor belt*
Con: *falls*
Sanchez: I got the mare, let's finish this loser off.
Con: *teleports into truck*
Dario: Where did he go?
Russian pony56: All trucks may leave the 下载 湾
Russians: *drive trucks*
Con: *drives truck*
Dario: He's driving one of our trucks!!
Rain: *kills Dario* See ya *flies away*
Sanchez: Damnit! Where is my car?

Warning, this has a extremely intense car chase. If 你 don't like intense action then do not read

Russians: *driving trucks*
Con: *driving behind them*
Russian trucker1: Who is that pony?
Sanchez: Attention, Con Mane has stolen one of our trucks. Stop him at all costs!
Russian trucker 1: I see him! *slows down*
Russian pony45: *driving bus*
Russian pony89: Stop!
Russian pony45: *stops* Get the rocket launchers, they're in the trunk.
Russian pony89: *grabs rocket launcher*
Russian trucker 1: *rams Con*
Con: *rams trucker*
Citizen 8975: *spins off road*
Con: *rams truck into canyon*
Construction worker: Wave that flag so the truck won't hit this ramp.
Construction worker2: Ok
Russian pony89: He's getting close *aims rocket*
Con: *goes faster*
Russian pony89: *shoots rocket*
Con: *gets truck on one side*
Construction workers: Aaaahh *runs away*
Russian pony89: How did I miss?!
Con: *drives toward them*
Russians: *run toward bus*
Con: *lands truck on bus*
Rain: *flies above* Oh man!
Con: *driving toward other truckers*
Russian trucker 2: *grabs mini uzi*
Con: *hits truck*
Russian trucker 2: *shoots tires on trailer*
Con: *stops truck*
Russian unicorns: *teleports near Con* Fire! *shoot at Con*
Rain: *throws grenade*
Russians: Where did this come from?! *die*
Con: Nice work Rain!
Rain: Your welcome!
Con: *unhitches trailer, then drives truck*
Sanchez: Take the wheel of my car, I'm going in that bigrig!
Russian pony90: How?
Sanchez: With wings idiot! *flies into big rig*
Russian trucker 3: Sir!
Sanchez: Keep driving, forget I'm here.
Con: *gets behind 2nd truck*
Russian trucker 2: *shoots windows*
Con: *pushes truck off road*
Russian trucker 2: Oh great!
2nd truck: *explodes*
Sanchez: Now he's heading towards us, floor it!
Russian trucker 3: *goes faster*
Con: *catches up*
Sanchez: Of course! HE has no trailer, so he can go faster then us!
Con: *gets behind 3rd truck*
Sanchez: *shoots at Con*
Con: *sets his truck to cruise control*
Russian trucker 3: Oh great! A hill!
Con: *jumps onto 3rd truck*
Sanchez: He's on the trailer! *shoots at Con*
Con: *sets charge on trailer*
Sanchez: What is he doing?
Con: *teleports off truck*
Sanchez: Hah! He left. That wimp couldn't deal with us!
Con: *detonates charge*
Russian trucker 3: *drives off cliff*
Con: do svidaniya Sanchez!
Sanchez: *flies up* 你 forgot I'm a pegasus!
Con: Oh shit *hits Sanchez*
Sanchez: *kicks Con*
Con: *breaks Sanchez's wings*
Sanchez: *falls on street*
Bus driver: *drives toward them*
Sanchez: *shoots driver*
driver: *flips bus over*
Con: *kicks Sanchez*
Sanchez: *makes fuel leak, but doesn't know*
Con: *pushes Sanchez into gasoline*
Sanchez: *hits Con*
Con: *breaks Sanchez's arm*
Sanchez: All this! 你 did all this for what purpose?
Con: For a friend *grabs lighter, and sets Sanchez on fire*
Rain: *flies toward Con* How about getting us back home?
Con: Yes sir!
Rain: *laughs*

1 and a half days later

Fenix: The doctor says I'll be out in a few weeks.
Con: Hey, congrats on surviving a 鲨鱼 bite, those aren't usual!
Fenix: Thanks my friend, I just hope Roseluck is alright.
Roseluck: I'm right here Fenix
Con: We have to go now, bye *hangs up*
Fenix: *hangs up* What a great pony.
Roseluck: So what do 你 wanna do now?
Con: *spots Rain* Jump in the pool *jumps in pool*
Rain: 你 got me wet!
Con: Sorry. Can I help 你 dry off?
Rain: Without magic? Sure
Con: *hugs Rain*
Rain: *kisses Con*

The End

Con Mane will return
posted by TimberHumphrey
so here are a few theories i got for this show:

Theory #1: since Hasbro and DHX never even bothered to give Cozy Glow any semblance of a backstory, my theory is that she's actually a fully-grown adult 小马 stuck inside a filly's body. she was born with a condition that never let her physically age after filly-hood.

Theory #2: while we do know Sunset used to be Celestia's 最佳, 返回页首 student, i always thought there was something 更多 to it than just a teacher-student relationship. and since we never get to see if Sunset had parents at some point in time, my theory is that she's Celestia's adopted daughter. remember how worried Celestia was about Sunset at the end of the first EqG movie? yeah, something tells me they're 更多 than just teacher and ex-student.

Theory #3: at one point in time, King Sombra used to be a great and loved king, before he became corrupted 由 his desire for power that forced Celestia and Luna to banish him into the abyss.
posted by Seanthehedgehog
The final part of Tom Foolery's 显示 is here.

Tom: Now, most of 你 probably don't know this, but we all have several things in common. I'll give 你 an example. We're all here together, in the greatest city in Maressouri.
Crowd: *Clapping*
Tom: I have some even funnier ones. When you're in your car, and 你 stop at a red light. Do 你 ever try to 移动 an extra inch 或者 two?
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: But when 你 see other cars in front of you, you're in no rush to get as close to the other guy as possible. 你 just coast to the red light.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Coast to the red light, then all of a sudden...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom was now making fun of the modern movie industry.

Tom: As much as I enjoy being an actor, when I'm not entertaining 你 with jokes.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: I always want to make sure the movie I'm in is good. They're not all comedies, my most 最近的 film, Suicide was actually quite dark. Yet for some reason, comedians feel like it's a great way to improve their career. Correct me if I'm wrong, but being in a dramatic R-rated film will not improve your comedy career.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: That's why no one knows who Jim Carrey is anymore.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: His 最近的 role as Dr. Robotnik...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tom continued insulting politicians, much to the delight of his audience.

Tom: Presidential candidates are always a good target for comedians to make fun of, but 你 know what another 流行的 target is? Black Lives Matter.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Many black ponies are accusing millions of ponies of the Caucasian race, for something only one police officer did in the Midwest!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Who's the racist now 你 assholes?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: And do 你 really think that every single Caucasian hates blacks?! When did we time travel back to the 18th Century?!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Even the...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
What's a comedy 显示 without politics? Tom is going to make fun of the presidential election.

Tom: I don't know what's worse, this covid pandemic, 或者 the presidential election.
Crowd: Yeah!!!
Tom: I don't trust either Trump, 或者 Biden so I'm not going to vote. *Talks like a filly* But Tom, it's important for the economy!
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Losing jobs, and spending money on taxes is not good for the economy!
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: I don't give a fuck what ponies tell me. I don't trust the president, I don't trust the princess, I don't trust anyone that works for the Equestrian government! Why?...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
After mentioning things 你 should only do alone, Tom had another segment for his audience to enjoy.

Tom: 你 know one thing I like to do when I'm alone? Rewatch some episodes of On The Block.
Crowd: *Cheering*
Tom: Not only do I enjoy comedy, but I also enjoy being an actor. It's the only job where 你 can get away with murder.
Crowd: *Quietly laughing*
Tom: Unless you're Robert Deniro, and the main protagonist is Al Pacino.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom: Seeing those two together was a lot of fun, but what really surprised me was seeing Pacino as a cop. He's normally the criminal, but I still got a kick...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


St. Foalis Maressouri, 6 PM.

A crowd of thousands of ponies gathered at the Gateway Arch to experience a comedy 显示 that was being filmed live in 4k. The comedian? Tom Foolery.

Crowd: *Clapping, and chanting* Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom! Tom!
Tom: *Arrives at a temporary stage under the Gateway Arch*
Crowd: *Cheering, as they continue to clap*
Tom: Thank 你 everypony.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: Thank 你 very much.
Crowd: *Continuing to cheer and clap*
Tom: And shut up.
Crowd: *Laughing*
Tom:...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog


Jerry: Sorry, but I got nothing.
Vito: I don't feel like dying. That's the reason we left the family in the first place.
Harlan: *Hears a car* What's that? *Looks out the window*
Vito: What is it?
Harlan: A cop.

The three stallions started to panic, but Vito had a plan.

Vito: I think I know what to do. Go upstairs and let me handle this.
Police Pony: *Rings the doorbell*
Vito: *Opens the door* How can I help 你 officer?
Police Pony: We got a complaint a while ago. Apparently this morning, some ponies had a gunfight just in front of your house. 你 know anything about this?
Vito: No. I was riding...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this episode.

Twilight Sparkle: *In a black 可兑换, 可转换, 敞篷车 with two Royal Guards. A bullet hits the door of the 可兑换, 可转换, 敞篷车 they're in*
Royal Guard: Princess, get down!

---

Captain Jefferson: Someone tried to assassinate the princess as she entered our town.

---

Twilight: Why would somepony want me dead?
Toby: That's what we're trying to find out.

---

Tim: *Gets punched three times 由 a blue unicorn. He gets punched one 更多 time, and his glasses break*

Intro
Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting 下一个 to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring Larry Wilcox as Tim...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
What to expect in this week's episode.

Tim: You're splitting us up?
Captain Jefferson: Just until Saturday. Someone's gotta teach the new guys what to do.

---

Pony: *Driving a sports car* Turn on the nitrous.
Pony 2: *Turns on the nitrous*
Pony: *Going faster*

---

Captain Jefferson: These two guys are wanted 由 the State Troopers, both in this state, and in Pennsylvania.
Tim: *Driving after the bad guys*
Captain Jefferson: We gotta be on our game.
Tim: *Hits another car, and goes on two wheels*

Song: link

Julia: *Driving her police car on the round freeway*
Tim: *Sitting 下一个 to her*

Gran Turismo

Starring...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
When Saten Twist returned to Los Angeles in the Super Chief, he saw Jake looking at him.

Jake: *Angry*
Saten: *Sweating* Why is he giving me that look? *Stops the train*
Jake: *Tapping his left front hoof on the ground, waiting for Saten Twist*
Saten: *Climbs down from the engine's cab* Why are 你 angry at me?
Jake: 你 owe me an apology for the way 你 talked to me yesterday.
Saten: John-
Jake: IT'S JAKE!!!!
Saten: Why are 你 getting angry at me all of a sudden?
Jake: Your lecture towards me made me lose my job, and now I can't find work anywhere else.
Saten: 你 quit?
Jake: Yeah. I'm still waiting...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
 Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!
Robotnik: Snooping as usual I see! *Talks faster* Snooping as usual *Slows down* I see!


Song: link
 Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*
Celestia: *Runs from the left. She jumps up, her wings spreading wide, then her face gets into the triangle*


Albuquerque, New Mexicolt. July 19th, 1958

Saten Twist: *Walking towards the Super Chief*
Stallion 16: Here to take this train all the way to Los Angeles?
Saten Twist: *Nods, and climbs into the cab*
Conductor: All aboard!!
Saten Twist: *Blows the horn twice, and makes the train go forward*
 This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies.
This is the train Saten Twist is driving, called the Super Chief. A luxury train for ponies....
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Oh shit, BT's not making fun of someone this time around? (well in an indirect way I might be but let's see where this goes)

Yeah, I don't care if anyone reads this, I just want to get this off of my chest, because I'm gonna try and be real with this site for once and it's 1 AM in the morning.

One thing I've noticed in the time that i've been a part of this club (since like, 2012 或者 something, idk), is that this club has 迷失 its backbone. The 最近的 year, now, I've been shitposting like mad, pissing in everyone's cornflakes. I have admittedly been the worst kind of person, for NO good reason....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: facebook, EQD
posted by SomeoneButNoone
My name? Alonzo Langusa. Age when I started operating? 23.


Act II

Vengeance...

Living was hard. I had to hide my name. I had to find a good job yet there was not enough money. Life was rough and it was because of these man. Vincent Galar, Apollo Monetto and Angelo Vertezio. I was taught 由 ma'am Crossroad not to kill. Yet I wanted to. I wanted vengeance. At age of 15 I started smoking and further drinking at age of 17 until at age of 23 I was kicked from my apartment. I went to Canterlot to find my good old friend her name was Clara. When I came she was shocked. I still remember it.


"Who are you?"...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
It was a cold night like this one when my father smoked his last cigarette in our family house. The night so cold even me myself did not want to go out. The time? As a kid 你 don't care about that. It was dark, and it was winter. 圣诞节 day. After Equestrian economical fall and industrial boom, everyone changed, the dirty mafias started to leak. My father was part of one of these. A high up. One of important people in Vertezio familia. Still on that night...

Act I

That Night...

"So how was your 日 outside" Father asked me with a smile. "Good" was all I answered. I was 11 what could I say....
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added by NocturnalMirage
Source: 脸谱
posted by SomeoneButNoone
Darkness - *burst into room* Bad news! Void was kidnapped!
Dan - What?!
Snowflake - Void...


----
Location - ???
---

Void - *wakes up strapped to some 表 covered with bandages* What the...
Nyx - Good 日 VOID. I never thought 你 will be the first to feel truth.
Void - What are you- *looks at him and see big machine behind him*
Nyx - Ah 你 see this. My project. 水果 of my reschearch. The best weapon ever. 你 know - cores are great aren't they. They stay alive for 20 years. But 你 know what is better in them. Their power. A sheer power that may 移动 body 或者 stimulate brain. And this 秒 thing...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
Tim, and Julia returned to the police station.

Captain Jefferson: Tim Miller, and Julia Rose.
Tim: Hello Captain.
Captain Jefferson: I heard about your heroic act on Monday Avenue. Well done.
Julia: Don't give us all of the credit Captain. There were other officers as well.
Captain Jefferson: I understand. When I see them, I'll give them their congrats as well.
Tim: We still on stakeout tomorrow Captain?
Captain Jefferson: That's right. You're on stakeout until further notice.

Next day.

Tim: *Driving his 毒蛇 passing Local Consideration*
Julia: Let's check out The Highway.
Tim: *Turns right on Byer Lane*...
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posted by SomeoneButNoone
Epilouge.
----------------
5 Years later.
----
Canterlot
13th May
---
Sandman - 13th of may...
Mare - A really fearful 日 huh?
Sandman - Damn right. I saw this city burn. I saw it die slowly.
Mare - It's okay. It's not rebuilded fully but it has buty it had before.
Sandman - Maybe but Eiffla tower won't be fixed. New York statue the same.
Mare - You're right on that...
---
Ice - Damn it's hot this may.
Fire - Yeah. It was quiet hot that 日 too.
Ice - Damn right.

----
Colt - Dad tell me about the war!
Damien - Well your dad fought for city we live in - Canterlot. 你 know it was hard but your daddy wanted to...
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