哈利·波特与暮光之城 Club
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PART FOUR:

Okay. Okay. I am a perfectly calm boy yes. That’s it. I will make myself forget what has just happened. There. All good. I forgot. (OH HERE LET ME HELP: HARRY, 你 JUST SET A SNAKE ON THAT JUSTIN FLICKEY KID AND NOW THE ENTIRE SCHOOL THINKS YOURE THE AIR OF SLYTHERIN!!!! ) Oh yeah. Thank 你 Emily. (YOURE WELCOME ) anyways because Emily is so eager to talk I should just let her share her point of view on things. Oh and Emily, its spelled h-e-i-r not a-i-r. A-i-r is what your head is full of. ( FINE, AND BTW 你 OWE ME A GALLION FOR THAT SMILEY. ANYWAYS, PEACE IS 表演 FUNNY, SHES ALL "HEY ARENT WE GOING TO HAVE DINNER?" AND IM ALL "WE JUST ATE" IT’S REALLY STRANGE. SNAPES A JERK. I DONT KNOW I JUST FELT LIKE 写作 THAT. ANYWAYS I HAVE A FEELING THAT PEACE IS BEHIND THE ATTACKS, BUT EVEREYTIME I ASK HER, SHE DENIES IT. BUT I KNOW BETTER. SHE GOT A NEW NOTEBOOK.QUIDDICH TOMORROW.) Oh yeah I forgot. Help! Help! The team did something that they are really are really going to regret: they made Emily a beater! I know your thinking "oh good Emily’s on the team" but it isn’t! 你 see, they trusted Emily with a bat for two hours straight! That is suicide! (YEAH...... and if that bludger goes anywhere near harry, they are going to need a new bludger ANYWAYS BYE!!!!!)
(EMILY! ) and harry








I MISSED DINNER. I MISSED DINNER. I swear. I was right on time. I woke up in the slytherin common room, felt hungry, walked down stairs, and bumped in to Emily. I 说 "where are 你 going." "Our common room." "Aren’t 你 coming to dinner?" "We just ate dinner." 说 harry. Emily added. "Its over." "ITS OVER" I yelled. And now I am back here feeling sorry for my self. Do 你 feel sorry for me tom? Do 你 tom? TOM?!?!?!?!

Yes.
Good. Because I am uber angry. I skipped lunch because I wasn't hungry. Now I am Soooo hungry. 你 wouldn't like me when I am hungry. GAAAA!!!! I need food.
Sorry.

Why are 你 sorry? 你 don’t need to be sorry its not 你 fault.
I had the impression it was.
Why?
Because 你 were with me before that.

OH YEAH.
Yep.
Well in that case I am not talking to you.
Dear diary,
me and Draco kissed a lot today. I talked to tom today. I hate tom. Tom is a jerk. HE MADE ME MISS DINNER.

<3
~peace.
<3
I am hungry.
GAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!










(HELP!!!!! HELP!!!!!!! OK, OK, BE COOL EMILY. BE COOL. OKAY NOT COOL! OKAY, SO HERMIONIE WAS HEADING TO THE LIBRARY, AND I WAS JUST TALKING TO HER, AND SHE FORGOT HER MIRRIOR!!! SO OBVIOUSLY, I WENT AFTER HER, AND AS I ROUNDED THE CORNER I BUMPED INTO ROSALIE HALE AND SHE WAS ALL "HEY COOL A MIRRIOR" AND SHE WONT GIVE IT BACK TO ME AND IM FREAKIN OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




OH NO. I KNOW WHAT I HAVE TO DO. AW DANG HERMIONIE IS SO GOING TO OWE ME. WHY OH WHY DO I HAVE TO BE MUGGLE BORN? I MEAN I REGRET IT HERE, I REGRET IT IN THE SEVENTH-OH CRAP HERE COMES THE SNAKE "HEY NO LEGS, OVER HERE!" OH GOD I HOPE I CAN RUN FAST.

EMILY)







Dear tom (STILL IGNORING YOU),
I bumped into Emily and Rosalie in the hallway... Emily looked mad. She was yelling, "GIVE ME BACK MY MIRROR!!!" Rosalie was like, "no way. We evil slytherin brats need to know how good we look. So I continued walking to the ghost’s (sorry I forgot her name) bathroom. Then Emily ran to me and asked. "Where are 你 going." so I 说 what I was doing. (I never lie >=]) "I am going to meet tom in the bathroom." then she was all like, "WHATT!!!!" then she choked me. And strangled me. And then Draco came!!!!(Jealous much?) He hit Emily and knocked her out. The he kissed me. Then he took the mirror from Rosalie and stared into it for a long time. Then I ran to the bathroom because nobody was watching. I blacked out again. When I came back Rosalie was 《冰雪奇缘》 and so was granger-girl. Emily was balled up in a corner crying and Draco was in fetal position rocking back and forth in shock. I screamed and ran to Draco. I fell head over heels tumbling towards him. I blacked out again. Is it just me 或者 do bad things happen whenever I go to the bathroom to meet you? Is this all my fault? What is going on?
Peace. 你 are doing this. Go to Hagrid’s hut today. Kill all of his chickens. Put the blood in a bottle. Bring it back to me. Then we will write on the walls a ransom note. We will rule the wizarding world Peace. Me and You. I Tom Riddle. I lord Voldemort!!! MWAHAHAHA...
Whoa. What? Lord Voldemort? OMG I have always wanted to meet you. I will do what ever 你 want your highness.
Well then do what I said. And uh. Hurry.
KK BYE!!!!





( Draco's dead. Peace is deader. I will kill them both. NOBODY knocks me out and lives. I was so right. Go me. And the worst part is, I CANT TELL ANYBODY! I am depressed. When peace blacked out, I kicked Draco in the head and he blacked out to. I will make a pact right now that says that a Malfoy ((or anything related )) will never knock me unconscious EVER again. And if they try, I will kill them. Now I g2g get Harry and Ron to come down to the chamber with me. I am taking Edward.

EMILY)




Kill chickens: check
Go to bathroom: walking there
.
.
.
HERE!
Do 你 have the blood?
Yes. But-
Now walk out of the bathroom
Done and-
Now what I tell you.
What?
I'm thinking!
...
Write 'Her body will rot in the chamber forever.'
Ooo! That’s catchy how did 你 come up with that? Who is 'Her'?
你 will soon find out now write. And come back I will be waiting for you.







Okay, harry here, so first l will fill 你 in on Aragog. In Hagrid’s hut Emily actually came in with Dumbledore with the excuse of ’I’m his assistant' the minister of magic actually fell for it. (FAIL!!! ) Yes thank 你 Emily. Anywa- (OOH OOH I WANT TO TELL THIS PART!!!! OKAY, SO WHEN LUCIUS SAYS "I HAVE NO PLEASOURE BEING IN YOUR-YOU CALL THIS A HOUSE?" K, SO 你 KNOW I CAN’T TAKE THAT LYING DOWN, SO I SAID: "YEAH, WELL I DONT HAVE ANY PLEASURE BEING IN YOURS EITHER. NICE DUNGON 由 THE WAY." WASNT THAT GREAT???!!! AND THE BEST PART WAS THAT HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT I WAS SAYING!!!! OH I JUST KILL MYSELF!!!! ) Yeah, woot woot. Anyways, turns out that Emily is almost as scared of spiders as Ron is! (AM NOT!) Are too. (AM NOT!!) Are too. (AM NOT!!!) Look spider! (AAH! WHERE?) Ha. (I HATE YOU. ) get in line. (JUST FOR THAT YOURE GOING DOWN IN THE CHAMBER BEFORE ME ) oh yeah, they took peace 由 the way. (YEAH AND WERE GOING DOWN TO GET HER) yup. And I think we have to go. (BYE)
Harry and (EMILY!!!! )






OH MY GOD TOM IT IS SO COOL DOWN HERE!!! What is the snake's name?
Um it’s a basilisk.
Whatevs. But what’s its name?
It doesn't have one.
Can I name it?
Sure.
Um.
.
.
Rosalie. The snake reminds me of a friend





EW, EW, EW, EW, this is so gross down here. We slid down a tunnel in le bathroom and now we are in a place with human skulls everywhere. Emily doesn't seem to mind though. (I AM SO PSYCHED TO MEET THE SNAKE. WEEEEEEEEE! ) yeah. Weee. Okay, we have just walked into the cavern. And.....peace is standing 下一个 to some dude. (HOLY CRAP PEACE IS IN LEAGUE WITH TOM RIDDLE) who's he? (ER-) shh he’s talking. Detailed 描述 starting now brought to 你 by: harry potter:

Peace: hi guys!
Emily\me: Ummmm..............hi?
Tom: hello harry potter-who are you?
Emily: names Emily. I don’t like you.
Tom: gee that's friendly. Oohhhhhh I know you. You’re that mudblood girl who the snake wont go near aren't you?
Emily: k, guess so.
Peace: oh, this is so exiting! What are we here for anyways?
Emily: 嘿 peace, hate to break it to you, but he is going to set a giant snake in us and kill us all.
Peace: cool can I watch?
Emily: I hate you.
Me (harry): wait- what? Why would he try to kill us?
Emily\peace: he’s lord voldemort!
Me: WHAT? Really?
riddle\peace\Emily: duh.
Emily: so.....now what?
Riddle: I guess I’m supposed to set the snake on 你 now.
Emily: k, 你 do that.

Well, we battled the snake, sort of.
Me: EMILY GET THE SWORD!!!!
Emily: noooooooo, swords are heavy and pointy. Can’t I just battle the snake with my dagge- 嘿 wait a minute! You’re supposed to be battling the snake!
Me: I know but you're sooooooo much stronger.
Emily: flattery will get 你 somewhere
So, Emily battled the snake instead of me, so I was happy, but the snake bit Emily AND me!!!!
Emily: awwwww look what 你 made me do
Riddle: HA!! Now 你 will both die, I will regain my true form, and lord voldemort-
Peace: uh tom?
Riddle: shut up I’m gloating
Peace: yeah but I really think 你 should know that-
Riddle: BE QUIET!! Now as I was saying, lord voldemort will rise again! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!!!!!!
Emily (quietly): I just got bit 由 a giant poisonous snake.
Peace: uh-oh
Riddle: what? What’s wrong?
Peace: that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. When she sees something ironic she-er-flips.
Emily: yeah, but 你 forgot one thing
Riddle: yes, but she only has 分钟 before the poison takes her
Peace: oh yeah, that’s another thing-
Me: oh no, we're all going to die here from the poison-EMILY ARE 你 EMO????!!!
(Emily looks up from sucking on her arm) Emily: no
Riddle: what are 你 doing?
Emily: using irony to my advantage
Peace: that looks cool can I try?
Emily: shut up I’m mad at you
Riddle: this doesn’t make any sense; 你 should be dead 由 now
(Edward walks in)
Edward: Emily are 你 making fun of me again?
Emily: no I just got bit 由 a giant snake. 嘿 would 你 do me a favor and run this sword through that diary?
Edward: sure, no problem
Peace: NO I LIKE HIM!!!!
Emily: yeah, so did Victoria but look what happened to her
So Edward ran the sword through riddle and we went upstairs.
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Daniel Radcliffe tries his hand at stand-up comedy on Jimmy Fallon xD
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丹尼尔·雷德克里夫
jimmy fallon
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late night
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