If grapes don't grow 由 themselves then how the hell did they get there to begin with?

Magic.

Good question. How in the hell did they get there wantadog?

Carefully

Well when god made the heavens and the earth .


He could make wine out of water .



And then he was like " damn Adam and Eve must want to get drunk too ."

So he made grapes to make wine .


You're welcome .

Evolution just like 玉米 and humans the first 葡萄 plants weren't actual 葡萄 plants. But then they evolved.

Aliens, of course.
When we arrived on this planet we had brought grapes with us, just like with pineapples and Michael Jackson.
Although Michael jacksons don't grow on trees 或者 in the ground like other less talented plants.