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posted by hornean
(Helen's mother: "I hope that 汤 is gone when I come back in there!")

The 日 Helen gave Martha dog her alphabet soup,


something unusual happened.
The letters in the 汤 went up to Martha’s brain instead of down to her stomach.

That evening, Martha spoke.
(Martha: Isn’t it time for my dinner?)


Martha’s family had many 问题 to ask her. Of course, she had a lot to tell them!
(Helen: Have 你 always understood what we were saying?)
(Martha: 你 bet! Do 你 want to know Benjie is really saying?)
(Helen’s father: Why don’t 你 came when we call?)
(Martha: 你 people are so bossy. Come! Sit! Stay! 你 never say please.)
(Helen’s mother: Do 狗 dream?)
(Martha: 日 and night. This morning, I dreamed I was chasing a giant meatloaf!)

Alphabet 汤 became a regular part of Martha’s diet, and the family had a wonderful time surprising people. Walking the dog was always good for a laugh.
(Martha: Yo, Rinty! Good dog. How’s the flea problem?)


They ordered 比萨, 比萨饼 from a different restaurant every night.
(Martha: How much do I owe you?)

They taught Martha how to use the phone.
But this was a mistake.
(Martha: Hello. Acme Meat Company? I’d like to make an order…)


Pretty soon, 更多 than 比萨, 比萨饼 was being delivered!
(Helen's mother: But I didn’t order any BarBQ.)

Family and 老友记 were amazed.
(Martha: Please pass the carcass.)
(Martha: Wanna go for a walk, granny?)


Although there were those who doubted,
(Boy: There is no such thing as a talking dog!)
Martha always had the last word.
(Helen: Speak, Martha.)
(Martha: WOOF! Just kidding.)

But there was a problem: now that Martha could talk, there was no stopping her.
She 说 exactly what was on her mind.
(Martha: Why is that man so fat?)


She made embarrassing comments.
(Martha: Mom 说 that fruitcake 你 sent wasn’t fit for a dog. But I thought it was delicious.)

And, she always told the truth.
(Helen's father: WHO DID IT?)
(Martha: Helen did it.)
Occasionally she wondered why her family was often mad at her.


But she kept on talking. She talked through everyone’s 最喜爱的 TV shows,
(Martha: I’ve seen this program. Want me to tell 你 what happens? The giant reptile did it, and the little kitten gets blamed….but it’s OK because Ninja Woman and Enviro-Man team up to save the little kitten and of course the world and…)
except her own.

She talked while they were trying to read.
(Martha: There’s a poodle over on Circuit Street. I’d really like to play with. He’s small but, what a dog! And speaking of small, I’m sure you’re all curious about the early days of my life…)


She talked and talked...
(Martha: I was born in a back alley to a poor but loving mother. Although she was a mixed breed, Momma was determined to raise us 小狗 right, to give us a solid background before she went out into the world at eight weeks. Even before our eyes were open, Momma would say: “You’re dogs! Not cats! Don’t ever forget that!” Blah blah blah blah blah. I still remember the rules Momma gave us to live by: (1) Beware of two-year-old humans with clothespins. (2) Under the 表 is the very best place to be during a meal. (3) Never mistake your human’s leg for a tree. (that was for my brothers, of course.) And… (4) If it’s black and white and smells funny, it’s not a cat. Don’t chase it. And while we’re on subject, I understand Cat, but I can’t speak it. Wait…where was I? Oh yes….)
and talked...
(Martha: Did 你 know that my mother gave me a name before 你 did. She named all of us puppies. I was three. My sisters were One, Six and Seven. My brothers were Two, Four, Five and Eight. I never did like Eight very much, but Six was a lot of fun… Blah Blah Blah. I’ll never forget my father’s face when he saw all us puppies. “Boy that’s a lot of puppies!” he said. What a funny dog! And when I was two blah blah blah.)
until her family could not stand it and said, “Martha, please!


“SHUT UP!”

“What’s wrong?” asked Martha.
“You talk too much!” yelled Father.
“You never stop!” yelled Mother.
“Sometimes,” 说 Helen, “I wish 你 had never learned to talk.”
Martha was crushed.


The 下一个 day, Martha did not speak. She didn’t ask for her dinner, 或者 to go out. She offered no opinions, but lay quietly beneath the 厨房 table.
At first her family enjoyed the silence, but after
a while they became worried.
“What’s the matter, Martha?” asked Helen.
Martha didn’t answer.
Helen’s father called the vet.
“There’s something wrong with my dog!” he said.
“She won’t say a word.”
“Is this some kind of a joke?” snapped the vet.

Helen offered Martha bowl after bowl of alphabet soup, but Martha had 迷失 her appetite for letters.


Martha’s family wondered if she would ever speak again.
Then one evening when her family was out, Martha heard the sound of glass breaking.

“A burglar!” she gasped. “I better call the police.”
She carefully dialed 911.


But when she opened her mouth to speak—
(Martha: Yip! Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf! Woof!)
Martha hadn’t eaten a bowl of alphabet 汤 in days!

Martha raced to the kitchen. She barked. She growled. She tried to look ferocious.
(Martha: Grrrrrr)


The burglar wasn’t frightened. He picked up a pot from the stove.

“Uh, oh,” thought Martha. “It’s taps for sure.”
But to her surprise, the burglar put the pot down
on the floor in front of her.
“Here, doggy,” he said. “Have something nice to eat.”
The burglar smiled as he closed Martha into the 厨房 and went back to work.


“Dumb dog,” he said. “Lucky for me 你 like alphabet soup.”

When Martha’s family returned, they found the police removing the burglar from their house.
“How did 你 know he was robbing our house?” asked Helen.
“We got a call at the station,” 说 the officer.
“Some lady named Martha.”


“Good dog, Martha!” exclaimed her happy family.
“You’re so right,” 说 Martha.
Now Martha eats a bowl of alphabet 汤 every day. She’s learning what to say and when to say it, and sometimes she doesn’t say anything at all . . .at least for a few minutes.