What a 吻乐队（Kiss） means kiss on forehead: I adore you kiss on cheek: I'm glad we're together kiss on hand: respect you kiss on neck: I want you kiss on shoulder:we belong together kiss on lips: I 爱情 you
What gestures mean: Holding hands: I like 你 a lot slap on butt:that belongs to me hold on tight:I don't want to let 你 go looking n each others eyes:you're beautiful play with hair:you're perfect arms around waist:this is mine laughing while kissing: I'm completely comfortable with you
*********** A good boyfriend would: Txt 你 everysecond he's not at your side hug 你 every chance 你 get &stays with you...
1. Smoke jimson weed. Do whatever comes naturally. 2. Switch the sheets on your beds while s/he is at class. 3. Twitch a lot. 4. Talk while pretending to be asleep. 5. Steal a fishtank. Fill it with 啤酒 and dump sardines in it. Talk to them. 6. Become a subgenius. 7. Inject his/her Twinkies with a mixture of Dexatrim and MSG. 8. Learn to levitate. While your roommate is looking away, float up out of your seat. When s/he turns to look, fall back down and grin. 9. Speak in tongues. 10. 移动 your roommate's personal effects around. Start subtly. Gradually work up to big things, and eventually...
When is 99 更多 than 100? ANS: A microwave. Generally when 你 run a microwave for '99' it runs for 1 分钟 and 39 seconds. '100' runs for 1 minute.
What is brown and sticky? ANS: A stick!
What two things can 你 never eat for breakfast? ANS: Lunch and dinner!
Suppose 你 had to pick 1 of 3 doors to go through. One has ninja assassins, one has a lion that hasn't eaten in 3 months, and one has a flaming inferno. Which door should 你 choose in order to live? ANS: The one with the lion. It hasn't eaten in 3 months, therefore it's dead!!
At work a lady is requested to 移动 a 2 ton machine with out...
Here's the famous 'Best Divorce Letter' 由 Dan to Connie, pretty hilarious, definitely a must read! xD
I know the counselor 说 we shouldn't contact each other during our "cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore.
The 日 你 left, I swore I'd never talk to 你 again but that was just the wounded little boy in me talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first on to make contact. In my fantasies, it was always 你 who would come crawling back to me. I guess my pride needed that. But now I see that my pride’s cost me a lot of things. I'm tired of pretending I don't miss you....
1.If 你 know that the guy is a Knicks fan, get front seats to a Knicks game and then prevent him from watching the final. Send him to the refreshments stand to get 你 a 可乐 instead, ensuring that he misses seeing that last crucial game-winning basket.
2.Take him to a chick flick marathon. If that isn't annoying enough, 测试 him throughout the movie about what he's thinking. Ensure that a big beefy 粉丝 of Sleepless in Seattle gets annoyed and sweetly tell him that your boyfriend could wipe the floor with him. Only be comforting after the guy gets a black eye.
Pick the 月 你 were born: January-------I kicked February------I loved March----------I karate chopped April------------I licked May------------I jumped on June-----------I smelled July------------I did the Macarena With August--------I had lunch with September----I danced with October-------I sang to November-----I yelled at December-----I ran over
Pick the 日 (number) 你 were born on: 1-------a birdbath 2-------a monster 3-------a phone 4-------a fork 5-------a snowman 6-------a gangster 7-------my mobile phone 8-------my dog 9-------my best friends' boyfriend...