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1. 你 can do whatever 你 damn well please.

2. Shave your legs and the razor is never dull from his face.

3. Not only is your razor not dull, who needs to shave at all now?

4. 你 can leave bra and other unmentionables in view.

5. 你 can slump around the house in any old thing.

6. 你 don't having to think about birth control, calendars 或者 ovulation. Mother Nature can visit whenever she likes.

7. 你 can go out and flirt as much as your 心 desires, without a worry in the world.

8. The toilet 座位 issue -- need I say more?

9. Free drinks at bars! Men seem to know when you're single and tend to...
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Reasons I 爱情 You:

1) The way 你 stand 由 my side


2) The times 你 make sure nothing will harm me


3) How 你 always find a new way to "WoW" me


4) When I'm sad, 你 take the pain away with a joke


5) How 你 always look deep into my eyes


6) How 你 can make my 心 melt with your soft lips


7) The way 你 hold my hand so tight


8) The way 你 never let my hands go


8) How 你 always watch out for me


9) They way 你 make sure I have everything I need


10) How 你 always know what to say when I get mad at you


11) When 你 buy me things out of the blue


12) How 你 say the cutest...
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I bet I know what some of 你 are thinking, "OMG! How can someone hate their family? That's horrible, what a brat 或者 what a b***h!"

Well, here's why :)

My mother is extremely controlling and b****es all the damn time and criticizes every little thing I do five times a freaking day! For example, I leave the door open for two 分钟 when I'm only getting something and going out again, and she hollers at me about how I'm wasting heat and how she's going to take my ipod的, ipod 或者 laptop for a week if I left it open again. 或者 when I do all of the chores she expects me to do and I do them how she'd see...
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posted by Penguin11
4
OMG LOOK WHAT I FOUND THEY ARE CREEPY
12 Things 你 Didn't Know About U.S. Presidents
Not only were these men leaders of our country--they were multitalented, unique, and even downright quirky. We've heard a lot about their contribution to United States history. But would 你 have guessed the following...?

1. First U.S. president George Washington rejected a movement among army officers to make him king of the United States.

2. Andrew Jackson, 7th U.S. president, dueled with Charles Dickinson after he insulted Jackson's marriage. Jackson let his opponent 火, 消防 first, giving himself time to...
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posted by Dippicus
2
Lucy and Linus (who where brother and sister) had another little brother named Rerun. (He sometimes played left-field on Charlie Brown's baseball team, [when he could find it!]).

The pancreas produces Insulin.

1 in 5,000 north Atlantic lobsters are born bright blue.

There are 10 human body parts that are only 3 letters long (eye hip arm leg ear toe jaw rib lip gum).

A skunk's smell can be detected 由 a human a mile away.

The word "lethologica" describes the state of not being able to remember the word 你 want.

The king of hearts is the only king without a moustache.

Henry Ford produced the...
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posted by xneville_rocksx
5
1. Know how to make 你 smile when 你 are down

2. Try to secretly smell your hair , but 你 always notice.

3. Stick up for you, but still respects your independence .

4. Give 你 the remote control during the game

5. Come up behind 你 and put his arms around 你

6. Play with your hair .

7. His hands always find yours .

8. Be cute when he really wants something.

9. Offer 你 plenty of massages

10. Dance with you, even if he feels like a dork .

11. Never run out of 爱情 .

12. Be funny , but know how to be serious

13. Realize he's being funny when he needs to be serious

14. Be patient when 你 take...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Cracking an international market is a goal of most growing corporations. It should not be that difficult, yet even the big multi-nationals run into trouble because of language and cultural differences. For example.The name Coco-Cola in China was first rendered as Ke-Kou-Ke-La. Unfortunately, the 可乐 company did not discover until after thousands of signs had been printed that the phrase means "Bite The Wax Tadpole" 或者 "Female Horse Stuffed With Wax," depending on the dialect. 可乐 then researched 40,000 Chinese characters and found a close phonetic equivalent, "Ko-Kou-Ko-Le," which can be...
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posted by Cyrusrocks
4
I thought these were funny. Hope u like them.



I "wonder" why some "people" like to use 随意 "quotation marks" in their "sentences".

Someone should get this state on meds cause this weather is bipolar!

Today's forecast: Partially moody with a chance of I don't like you.

Be warned if 你 piss me off today I'm going to knock your teeth so far down your throat 你 will need to stick your toothbrush up your backside to clean them.

I am only crazy 99% of the time.. The other 1% is trying to figure out how to make it a 100%! :p

If 你 are god's gift to women, then i hope god kept the receipt coz...
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1. When he is asleep, put a CD into the boombox (Example, Raining Men 或者 Single Ladies) and sing along with it on maximum volume.

2. When he is playing an arcade game, look over his sholder and push a 随意 button. Make sure he dies in the game.

3. When he tells 你 to do something, keep saying "And then" until he does it himself.

4. Put Toki's Teddy 熊 with him when he is asleep and tell Toki that Nathan loves it 更多 than he does.

5. When he sings during a concert, jump on stage and tackle him yelling "I will, be sure to buy me a white dress." Make sure everyone heard.

6. If he is in the main...
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1. Ask him why he 'doesn't have such a cool scar?'
2. Laugh at him.
3. Wake him up 由 唱歌 海滩 Boys songs in his ear. 'Round, round, get around, I get around...'
4. Knit him things. Really hideous things.
5. Give him kangaroo-ears for a month.
6. Smile during Death Eater meetings and say 你 taught him everything he knows.
7. Chew bubblegum all the time. Should he address you, your only response will be a series of huge bubbles in quick succession, the last of which will burst everywhere and make a mess.
8. Dance the Funky Chicken.
9. Ask him when was the last time he took a bath.
10....
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
3
A bus carrying only ugly people crashes into an oncoming truck, and everyone inside dies.

They then get to meet their maker and because of the grief they have experienced; he decides to grant them one wish each, before they enter Paradise.

They're all lined up, and God asks the first one what the wish is. "I want to be gorgeous," and so God snaps His fingers, and it is done.

The 秒 one in line hears this and says "I want to be gorgeous too." Another snap of His fingers and the wish is granted.

This goes on for a while with each one asking to be gorgeous but when God is halfway down the line the last guy in the line starts laughing.

When there are only ten people left, this guy is rolling on the floor, laughing his head off.

Finally, God reaches this last guy and asks him what his wish will be. The guy eventually calms down and says:

"Make 'em all ugly again".
posted by kellyclarkson12
3
My favourite 名人

1.Michelle Trachtenberg-She is just very cool and acts perfectly in 17 Again and Gossip Girl as Georgina :)))

2.Leighton Meester-She is a wonderful singer,great actress and woman and acts perfectly in Gossip Girl as Blair :)

3.Dreama Walker-She is a wonderful actress in Gossip Girl as Hazel.

4.Kate French-Love her as Nikki Stevens in The l Word :)

5.Rachel Bilson-Can I add more?An amazing woman,perfect actress,wonderful style,amazing way of behaviour and way of life.She is my role model

6.Bethany Joy Galeotti-She is great,acts perfectly as Haley in One 树 Hill,has some great songs and has an amazing character.

7.Maite Perroni-A great woman and a singer!
posted by Gracie1995
1
The Full 列表 from the book STUFF WHITE PEOPLE LIKE – How to find social success with the urban-dwelling middle classes 由 Christian Lander

#129 Banksy
#128 Camping
#127 Where the Wild Things Are
#126 Vespa Scooters
#125 Bob Marley
#124 Hating People Who Wear Ed Hardy
#123 Mad Men
#122 Moleskine Notebooks
#121 Funny 或者 Ironic Tattoos
#120 Taking a 年 Off
#119 Sea Salt
#118 Ugly Sweater Parties
#117 Political Prisoners
#116 Black 音乐 that Black People Don’t Listen to Anymore
#115 Promising to Learn a New Language
#114 America
#113 Halloween
#112 Hummus
#111 豌豆 Coats
#110 Frisbee Sports
#109 The Onion
#108...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
5
1. "No stopping 或者 standing." -- A sign at bus stops everywhere.

2. "Do not sit under coconut trees." -- A sign on a coconut palm in a West Palm 海滩 park circa 1950.

3. "These rows reserved for parents with children." -- A sign in a church.

4. "All cups leaving this store, rather full 或者 empty, must be paid for." -- A sign in a Cumberland Farms in Hillsboro, New Hampshire.

5. "Malfunction: Too less water." -- A notice left on a coffee machine.

6. "Prescriptions cannot be filled 由 phone." -- On a form in a clinic.

7. "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." -- On a bag of Fritos.

8. "Fits one head." -- On a hotel-provided 淋浴 帽 box.

9. "Payment is due 由 the due date." -- On a credit card statement.

10. "No small children." -- On a laundromat triple washer.

11. "Warning: Ramp Ends In Stairs." -- A sign, correctly describing the end of a concrete ramp intended for handicap access to a bridge.
posted by Shelly_McShelly
4
Colonel Sanders
There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. 你 can't do any business from there.

Roseanne Barr
Experts say 你 should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

W.C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Milton Berle
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.

George Gobal
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching 电视 由 candlelight.

Groucho Marx
I find 电视 very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the...
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WELDONE!

YOU HAVE FAILED TO IGNORE THIS MESSAGE TO 你 - THE PERSON WHO FAILED!

dear fellow 潮流粉丝俱乐部 failures...

i have failed to bring 你 the news of fail blog sooner...

some of 你 may know but the rest of 你 probabley fail to know what im talking about. well fail blog is the brand new fail site. it's stuffed full of posts of your 日 to 日 FAILS. it does have the occasional win... there are the most 随意 posts of failed 照片 shots of failures 发布 由 dedicated failed fail-er fail finders some are plain stupid but it won't fail to make 你 laugh! 你 can take failed pictures your self...
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Supports your body’s antioxidant and nutritional needs.





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
MonaVie™ features a delicious blend of the Brazilian açai berry—one of nature's 最佳, 返回页首 superfoods—and 18 other body-beneficial fruits. This Balance-Variety-Moderation approach to nutrition delivers powerful antioxidants and phytonutrients to help fight free radicals and maintain your body's 总体, 整体 health.

The Premier Açai Blend™
MonaVie's delicious blend of body-beneficial fruits is designed to nourish your body with powerful antioxidants and...
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posted by milorox18
4
REMEMBER WHEN ...

getting HiGH meant swinging at a playground?

the worst thing 你 could get from a boy was c0otiEs?

Mom (was your hero)

and Dad was the boy 你 were gonna marry?

when your W0RST ENEMiES were your siblings

and Race Issues were about who ran fastest?

when "War" was a card game

and life was simple and care free?

 remember when all 你 wanted to do

WAS GROW UP?
posted by milorox18
10
A True Boyfriend:


When she walks away from 你 mad, follow her

When she stare's at your mouth, 吻乐队(Kiss) her

When she pushes 你 或者 hit's you, Grab her and dont let go

When she start's cussing at you, 吻乐队(Kiss) her and tell her 你 爱情 her

When she's quiet, Ask her what's wrong

When she ignore's you, Give her your attention

When she pull's away, Pull her back

When 你 see her at her worst, Tell her she's beautiful

When 你 see her start crying, Just hold her and dont say a word

When 你 see her walking, Sneak up and hug her waist from behind

When she's scared, Protect her

When she lay's her head on your shoulder,...
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posted by xxXsk8trXxx
5
1. If Lady Gaga is on a date, go up to her 日期 and whisper to him "She wants to take a ride on youre disco stick."

2. Visit your 最喜爱的 celeb... and bring flowers.

3. Follow Angelina Jolie and/or Brad Pitt around asking 问题 like "How are 你 and Bradd/Angelina? Any problems going on?" and then take out a notebook and a pen.

4. Papparazi-for-a-day. Take as many pictures as 你 can, and then make up your own story to go with the pictures. Try to put them on a gossip magazine.

5. Go to an exclusive club.

6. Rent a mansion with over 80 rooms and a giant pool. Rent a red 可兑换, 可转换, 敞篷车 to go along with it. Ride your 可兑换, 可转换, 敞篷车 with sunglasses, turn on the radio, and say "Oh yeah."

7. Get so drunk that 你 don't even know your name.

8. Eat a cake with 培根 in it.

9. Attend a movie premiere.

10. Go to the 海滩 wearing a sexy bathing suit. Who cares about your figure 或者 how 你 look like, go out there!