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posted by cloudstrifefan
1.Einstein was four years old before he could speak.
2.Issac Newton did poorly in grade school.
3.Beethoven's 音乐 teacher once 说 of him,"As a composer,he is hopeless."
4.When Thomas Edison was a boy his teacher told him he was too stupid to learn anything.
5.Michael Jordan was cut from his high school 篮球 team.Boston Celtics Hall of Famers Bob Cousy and Bill Russel suffered the same fate.
5.A newspaper editor fired Walt 迪士尼 because he had no good ideas.
6.Winston Churchill failed the sixth grade.
7.Steven Spielberg dropped out of high school in his sophomore year. He was persuaded to come back and placed in a learning disabled class. He lasted a 月 and dropped out forever.
added by LunaShay
Don't let them catch you.
video
funny
weird
随意
smosh
added by Lizijana
added by Sammisaurus
added by Kiniko90
posted by TheRealSexyKate
Q: Why did the forgetful chicken 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: To get to the other side -- er, no -- to go shopping -- no, not that either -- damn it.

Q: Why did the redneck 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: He wanted to sleep in the ditch on the other side.

Q: Why did the one-handed man 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: To get to the 秒 hand shop.

Q: Why did the turkey 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: Because he wasn't a chicken.

Q: Why did the fat turkey 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: To get hit 由 my car.

Q: Why did the woman 交叉, 十字架 the road?

A: I don't know, but where'd she get shoes and what is she doing out of the kitchen?
posted by JoannaVonDoom
A
is for Arteries.
You know, the things that your ex-girlfriend ripped out because she really didn't care for 你 你 twit she was only after your money and could have 给 a shit about you.

B
is for Bitter. Who, me?? No way. I really hope things between them do work out. I hope they get married and have 2 children that are little devils and her hips get huge and his eyebrows finally grow completely together and they get fat and old together and then DIE!!

C
is for Call ya later.She won't. She never has before.

D
is for Dumped. Does D need to be explained?

E
is for Eating like a pig. Remember when...
continue reading...
posted by BlackSunshine
哈哈 I found this on the internet.

INTERESTING FACTS

1. If 你 yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, 你 would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.

(Hardly seems worth it)



2. If 你 fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.

(Now that's 更多 like it)



3. A pig's orgasm lasts for 30 minutes.

(In my 下一个 life I want to be a pig)

(How'd they figure this out, and why?)



4. Banging your head against a 墙 uses 150 calories an hour.

(Still can't get over that pig thing)

(Don't try this at home...maybe at work?)



5. Humans...
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posted by invadercalliope
Ok let me tell 你 14 resons how :3
Ok some of these pertend i'm a boy


1)Put your arm around a person 你 don't know

2)Then twirl another 随意 persons hair and ask them if there going to the game tonight
3)Offer them hair
4)tell them about your period last night
5)tell them about the bird and the bees
6)rub your self against the teacher
7)look in to a 随意 persons eyes and make a very weird face
8)showing your friend your dick
9)come to skool 唱歌 the barney song
10)talk to your friend and take off your wig and 显示 them your really miley cyrus
11)pick your nose and ask someone if they want a bite
12)rape a 随意 person
13)start crying in the hall for no reason
14)JUMP!!!!!!!
posted by Mallory101
1. If 你 are right handed, 你 will tend to chew your 食物 on your right side. If 你 are left handed, 你 will tend to chew your 食物 on your left side.

2. If 你 stop getting thirsty, 你 need to drink 更多 water. For when a human body is dehydrated, its thirst mechanism shuts off.

3. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep 你 from crying.

4. Your tongue is germ free only if it is pink. If it is white there is a thin film of bacteria on it.

5. The Mercedes-Benz 格言 is “Das Beste oder Nichts” meaning “the best 或者 nothing”.


6. The 泰坦尼克号 was the first ship to use the SOS signal....
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posted by 789703011
1. What is your natural hair color?
Dark brown

2. Where was your ID pic taken?
home

3. What's your middle name?
anne

4. Your current relationship status?
Single just got dumped

5. Honestly, does your crush like 你 back?
yes

6. What is your current mood?
hunger

7. What's the color of your underwear?
blue...

8. What is one thing that makes 你 happy?
pizza

9.Who was the last person 你 cuddled with?
it was probably my kitty!

10. If 你 could go back in time, and change
the idea of tackin this 测试

11. If 你 MUST be an animal for ONE day-
I'd be a cat because they can just lay around all day...
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added by SymmaGirl2
posted by Spi_Kat_Penguin
Not So Smart, Need A Sign?

Number One Idiot
I am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center.
Today, this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants.
I quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there would be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital.
She calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants.
I told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away. Here's your sign, lady....
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1
LADY GAGA

2
TAYLOR SWIFT

3
EMINEM

4
LADY ANTEBELLUM

5
KE$HA

6
USHER

7
THE BLACK EYED PEAS

8
JUSTIN BIEBER

9
RIHANNA

10
DRAKE

11
KATY PERRY

12
SUSAN BOYLE


13
JASON DERULO

14
B.O.B

15
TAIO CRUZ


16
TRAIN

17
LUDACRIS

18
TREY SONGZ
    

19
MICHAEL BUBLE

20
LIL WAYNE

21
ALICIA KEYS

22
BRUNO MARS


23
CARRIE UNDERWOOD

24
MILEY CYRUS


25
ZAC BROWN BAND

26
JAY-Z


27
ADAM LAMBERT

28
MICHAEL JACKSON

29
YOUNG MONEY

30
ANDREA BOCELLI

31
IYAZ

32
OWL CITY

33
JOHN MAYER

34
MIKE POSNER

35
NICKI MINAJ

36

JASON ALDEAN

37
GLEE CAST

38
JAY SEAN

39
SELENA GOMEZ

40
MIRANDA LAMBERT

41
THE SCRIPT

42
TIMBALAND

43
ONEREPUBLIC

44
SNOOP DOGG

45
DAVID GUETTA

46
SADE

47
SUGARLAND

48
ENRIQUE IGLESIAS...
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Hey, I got bored and was flipping through some papers, and I saw where I started to write this song. So I edited what was there and tried to fix it up some and added the rest. It was just for fun. Hope 你 like it.



Need You


INTRO:
(Hey 嘿 Hey)
Hear what I say
I need 你 I want you
(Come closer)

And, and
Oh I know, oh
Theres, theres 更多 to life.
Than waiting, for 你 to realize.
(What 你 need, its right in front of your eyes)
But really, its all I wanna do.
Just be with you, be with you

&& I sit here
With my head hung low
And the phone in my lap.
I sit here
Wait for 你 to call back
(But 你 never...
continue reading...
added by ccdiggs
added by tanyya
added by hettycool
added by justinfangrrl
added by Alma_
added by 050801090907