With so many cell phones in the world, it’s no wonder that every so often 你 receive a strange text message from someone 你 don’t know. Chances are it’s a wrong number. Simple as that. But what if it isn’t? What if the message is really a clue to some top-secret puzzle, 或者 sent from a spy trying to warn 你 of an assassination attempt?
These are the thoughts that run through our minds whenever we receive the message “where r u?” from a phone number we do not recognize. How do 你 handle these coded messages/wrong numbers? Here are a few options.
1. Text back – It’s tempting. If 你 don’t know the person, why not send a message, “Who is this?” and wait for a response? We'll tell 你 why not: because the person on the other end might be a high-tech serial killer simply waiting to make sure you’re near your cell phone before he hits the correct sequence of buttons that will blow up your phone, killing 或者 maiming you. We found no recorded evidence of such an attack, but that only means the government doesn’t want us to know about it.
2. Look up the number online – There is a lot of information online, but finding a cell phone number on the internet is almost impossible. 你 could spend a good five 分钟 trying to track down the caller, only to learn that the digits aren’t listed anywhere. Plus, you’ll need to suffer through snotty Google’s constant badgering of, “Did 你 mean….” No, Google. We didn’t mean that. We meant what we said, 你 arrogant know-it-all.
3. Pretend it was from a celebrity – There are many 名人 in the world, and they all have cell phones. Even Tom Hanks. There’s a slim chance that such a celeb sent out a text message to 你 由 mistake. So, without doing any research whatsoever, feel free to assume the odd text message came from your 最喜爱的 celebrity. It just might be true.
4. Wait for 更多 information – If 你 do not respond, the person on the other end might send a follow-up message, such as, “Mike and I are going bowling,” 或者 “I’m a high-tech serial killer who shall blow up your cell phone.” Play the waiting game, and 更多 clues may follow. (Discontinue the waiting game after two days, because the game is pretty much over 由 then. 你 lost.)
5. Ask your 老友记 – Sometimes a friend might be using someone else’s cell phone, 或者 a new phone, thus resulting in a strange phone number, so 你 may want to ask around. 由 process of elimination, 你 could check with all of your 老友记 and relatives 由 sending out a text message such as, “Did 你 text me?” 或者 “Did 你 text me, fool?” This probably won’t work, but at least now all of your 老友记 and relatives think you’re 流行的 because 你 get fancy text messages.
6. Write an 文章 about it for SparkNotes, and hope the culprit reveals himself/herself in the 评论 section.
7. Bury the phone in the backyard – Because the old woman in the scary house told 你 it’s the only way to stop the curse.
8. Do nothing.
9. Overanalyze the message – What could “where r u?” mean? Was it sent from your secret crush? Did the texter use playful R’s and U’s because s/he is in 爱情 with you? Should 你 put on fancy clothes and pack a bag because this mystery lover is about to whisk 你 away on a romantic motorcycle ride across the country? Is this how 你 will find the 爱情 of your life?! Eeeee!
10. Send the person a 照片 of your butt – As if 你 haven’t already done this.
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These are the thoughts that run through our minds whenever we receive the message “where r u?” from a phone number we do not recognize. How do 你 handle these coded messages/wrong numbers? Here are a few options.
1. Text back – It’s tempting. If 你 don’t know the person, why not send a message, “Who is this?” and wait for a response? We'll tell 你 why not: because the person on the other end might be a high-tech serial killer simply waiting to make sure you’re near your cell phone before he hits the correct sequence of buttons that will blow up your phone, killing 或者 maiming you. We found no recorded evidence of such an attack, but that only means the government doesn’t want us to know about it.
2. Look up the number online – There is a lot of information online, but finding a cell phone number on the internet is almost impossible. 你 could spend a good five 分钟 trying to track down the caller, only to learn that the digits aren’t listed anywhere. Plus, you’ll need to suffer through snotty Google’s constant badgering of, “Did 你 mean….” No, Google. We didn’t mean that. We meant what we said, 你 arrogant know-it-all.
3. Pretend it was from a celebrity – There are many 名人 in the world, and they all have cell phones. Even Tom Hanks. There’s a slim chance that such a celeb sent out a text message to 你 由 mistake. So, without doing any research whatsoever, feel free to assume the odd text message came from your 最喜爱的 celebrity. It just might be true.
4. Wait for 更多 information – If 你 do not respond, the person on the other end might send a follow-up message, such as, “Mike and I are going bowling,” 或者 “I’m a high-tech serial killer who shall blow up your cell phone.” Play the waiting game, and 更多 clues may follow. (Discontinue the waiting game after two days, because the game is pretty much over 由 then. 你 lost.)
5. Ask your 老友记 – Sometimes a friend might be using someone else’s cell phone, 或者 a new phone, thus resulting in a strange phone number, so 你 may want to ask around. 由 process of elimination, 你 could check with all of your 老友记 and relatives 由 sending out a text message such as, “Did 你 text me?” 或者 “Did 你 text me, fool?” This probably won’t work, but at least now all of your 老友记 and relatives think you’re 流行的 because 你 get fancy text messages.
6. Write an 文章 about it for SparkNotes, and hope the culprit reveals himself/herself in the 评论 section.
7. Bury the phone in the backyard – Because the old woman in the scary house told 你 it’s the only way to stop the curse.
8. Do nothing.
9. Overanalyze the message – What could “where r u?” mean? Was it sent from your secret crush? Did the texter use playful R’s and U’s because s/he is in 爱情 with you? Should 你 put on fancy clothes and pack a bag because this mystery lover is about to whisk 你 away on a romantic motorcycle ride across the country? Is this how 你 will find the 爱情 of your life?! Eeeee!
10. Send the person a 照片 of your butt – As if 你 haven’t already done this.
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