Here are my 列表 of corny jokes. Now i'm just gonna let 你 know now i got alot of these from the youtobe channel, vlogbrothers. So check them out too. Prepare to laugh.
(Make sure your not drinking anything 或者 eating anything 你 might spit it 或者 something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the 扫帚 late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the 湾 they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's 最喜爱的 vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the 蘑菇 have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do 你 call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do 你 call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do 你 make an octopus giggle ten times?
你 give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do 你 make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's 最喜爱的 composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between 你 and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't 你 hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher 说 it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the 番茄 blush?
It saw the 沙拉 dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do 你 know if it's raining 猫 and dogs?
你 step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do 你 know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do 你 get 皮卡丘 on a bus?
你 神奇宝贝 (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't 你 dress with 皮卡丘 in the room?
He'll 皮卡丘 (peek at you)
#27 What do 你 call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
你 boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton 交叉, 十字架 the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do 你 call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's 粉, 粉色 and fluffy?
粉, 粉色 fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
粉, 粉色 fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when 你 drink 7 coca colas?
你 burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the 鱼 say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't 你 trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope 你 liked them. Make sure 你 check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
(Make sure your not drinking anything 或者 eating anything 你 might spit it 或者 something.)
#1 How did the hipster burn his tongue?
He drank coffee before it was cool.
#2 Why are celsius and farenheit friends?
Because they're fair-in-height. (I came up with that one :)
#3 Why was the 扫帚 late to work?
It overswept!
#4 Why do seagulls fly over the sea?
Because if they flew over the 湾 they'd be bagels.
#5 What's Michelle Obama's 最喜爱的 vegetable?
Barackoli (broccoli)
#6 Why does the 蘑菇 have so many friends?
Because he's a fungi! (Fun guy)
#7 What do 你 call a fake noodle?
An impasta! (Imposter)
#8 How often do i make chemistry jokes?
Periodically.
#9 What do 你 call a pencil without lead?
Pointless!
#10 How do 你 make an octopus giggle ten times?
你 give him ten-tickles (tenticles)
#11 How do 你 make lady gaga cry?
Poker face!
#12 What did Beethoven become when he died?
A decomposer!
#13 What's a chicken's 最喜爱的 composer?
Bach!
#14 What did one eye say to the other eye?
"Between 你 and me man, something smells." (Your nose)
#15 What did the stamp say to the envelope?
"Stick with me man, we'll go places."
#16 What did the hat say to the hatrack?
"Stay here, I'll go on a-head."
#17 Why can't 你 hear a pteradactyl use the bathroom?
Because the "p" is silent (the letter p in the name is silent)
#18 Why did the little boy eat his homework?
The teacher 说 it was a piece of cake.
#19 Why did the 番茄 blush?
It saw the 沙拉 dressing.
#20 What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper?
"Ruff!" (Rough)
#21 Why did the man send his phone to school?
He wanted a smartphone (i came up with that one too :)
#22 How do crazy people go through a forest?
They take the psycho path.
#23 How do 你 know if it's raining 猫 and dogs?
你 step in a poodle (puddle)
#24 How do 你 know if a clock is wise?
It goes clockwise (i thought of that)
#25 How do 你 get 皮卡丘 on a bus?
你 神奇宝贝 (pok 'em on)
#26 Why can't 你 dress with 皮卡丘 in the room?
He'll 皮卡丘 (peek at you)
#27 What do 你 call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese (so old right?)
#28 How do get holy water?
你 boil the hell out of it!
#29 What starts with "E" ends with "E" but only has one letter in it?
An envelope, duh xD
#30 Why didn't the skeleton 交叉, 十字架 the road?
He didn't have the guts to.
#31 What did the ghost say to scare the bees?
"BOOOOBEEES!" XD (please don't yell that if your parents are home)
#32 What does an angry pepper do?
It gets jalepeño face! (All up in yo face)
#33 What do 你 call an alligator in a vest?
An in- vest-igator investigator
#34 What's 粉, 粉色 and fluffy?
粉, 粉色 fluff
#34.5 what's blue and fluffy? (Think about it)
粉, 粉色 fluff holding it's breath.
#35 What happens when 你 drink 7 coca colas?
你 burp 7up
#36 Why can't your nose ever be 12 inches long?
Because then it'd be a foot.
#37 why does snoop dog carry an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle!
#38 Why was the police man in bed?
He was undercover.
#39 what did one light bulb say to another light bulb?
"Watts up?" (You know li,e the watts that are in a light bulb?)
#40 what did the 鱼 say when he hit a concrete wall?
"Dam!"
LAST ONE!
#41 Why can't 你 trust lions?
They be lion to you! (Lying)
Alright so those are my corny jokes. Hope 你 liked them. Make sure 你 check out vlogbrothers they're really cool. Ciao! And rememeber...
-Some people wear 超人 pajamas. 超人 wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
-Only Chuck Norris knows the true end of the movie Inception
-When Chuck Norris throws a boomarang it doesn't dare come back
-Do 你 know how many push ups Chuck Norris has done? All of them
-Neil Armstrong never went to the moon for NASA, he was trying to run away from Chuck Norris
-Chuck Norris knows the letter after Z
-Chuck Norris was the alien who told the Egyptians how to invent the pyramid
-What's Chuck Norris' 最喜爱的 Number?....................CHUCK NORRIS
-Superman wears Chuck Norris underpants.
-When Chuck Norris falls out of a 船, 小船 he dosn't get wet the water gets Chuck Norrised
-Chuck Norris doesn't read books, he just stares them down until he gets the information he wants out of them.
-Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life.
-Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.
1.Allen walker (d grey man)
2.Gaara (naruto/shippuden
3.Hatsuharu sohma (fruits basket)
4.Deidara (naruto shippuden)
5.Senri shiki (vampire knight)
6.Tsubasa otori (beyblade/metal masters)
7.Toushiro hitsugaya (bleach the movie)
8.Neji hyuga (naruto/shippuden)
9.Mystel (beyblade g revolution)
10.zelgardis breywords (the slayers)
11.hikaru (ouran highschool host club)
12.china (hetalia) (i think?)
13.hanabusa (vampire knight)
14.takama ichijo (vampire knight)
15.zaku (naruto) (deceased aka dead)
When 你 turn around, who is that behind you?
Bury your claws in the darkness and shred the night
The raindrops turn to drops of blood and trickle down your cheek
If 你 have no place to return to
Stop on this finger, on this finger of mine
Where the evening cicadas cry in the forbidden forest
你 cannot turn back anymore
__________________________________________________
furimuita sono ushiro no sorewa dare
kurayami ni tsume wo tatete yoru wo hikisaita
amadare wa chi no shizuku to natte hoho wo tsutaiochiru
mou dekonimo kaeru basho ga nainara
kono yubi tomare watashi no yubi ni
sono yubi goto tsuretetteageru
higurashi ga naku akazu no mori de
atomodori wa mou dekinai
Bury your claws in the darkness and shred the night
The raindrops turn to drops of blood and trickle down your cheek
If 你 have no place to return to
Stop on this finger, on this finger of mine
Where the evening cicadas cry in the forbidden forest
你 cannot turn back anymore
__________________________________________________
furimuita sono ushiro no sorewa dare
kurayami ni tsume wo tatete yoru wo hikisaita
amadare wa chi no shizuku to natte hoho wo tsutaiochiru
mou dekonimo kaeru basho ga nainara
kono yubi tomare watashi no yubi ni
sono yubi goto tsuretetteageru
higurashi ga naku akazu no mori de
atomodori wa mou dekinai