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I'm a girl pervert!I say guys are crazy cuz they think I touch their butts!I blame it on their hormones even though I touched their butts alot!

1.Be a real pervert

2.You don't have to look like one but just act like one

3.Always when you're walking behind a guy always look at their butt!And say"say veiw" then touch it nice and gently! :)

4.They look back and ask 你 say'what?no way especially not your flat ass!!!!"when they turn around find another butt to look at!

5.Look at their muscles when they're wearing 衬衫 sleeve shirts and they're doing heavy lifting

6.Take pictures as well

7.Always 评论 on how hot their body look doing what looks hot!

8.Wait 你 run into a guy pervert PERV FIGHT!!!!!

9.Talk about the most perverted thing 你 did and said!

10.Anyways,if 你 like pickles,bananas,cucumbers and things shaped like that eat them sexy!

11.When a guy says"hey girl why don't 你 do that to my hot dog?" 你 simple say "I only do this with guys bigger that 5 inches" ^^

12.Always hang on to a guys arm and put your hand in their pocket!

13.If they don't like 吻乐队(Kiss) them 吻乐队(Kiss) them 吻乐队(Kiss) THEM!!!well be touchy!

14.Watch a lot of guy on guy action and stuff like that!

15.Always be a pervert to a certain type never random.LIKE THIS CLUB!!!!!!!!

16.Listening to perverted 音乐 and sometimes 爱情 songs

17.Have perverted maginzes,books and movies

18.At parties wear revealing clothes but bot too revealing.You 展示 your stomach not boob showing,leg 展示 no arm showing,boobs no smotach,or arm 展示 no legs!

19.Always hang out with cute guys!!

20.Live in places were boys are at and it's hot so they wear short sleeve shirts and, 或者 shorts!

21.Look cute and be innoncent 表演 but not really *evil laugh*

22.Be confident and crazy

23.Be really pretty

24.Be a little popular

The End if it's bad F**K 你 IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE A DICK 或者 婊子, 子 AND SORRY IF SOMEONE ALREDY MADE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry for typos and stuff!!!
added by Tamar20
added by Tamar20
added by teamsalvatore98
Source: 谷歌 图片
added by UnKnownSpy
Source: The Sign =)
added by x_-emily-_x
added by zanhar1
added by zanesaaomgfan
Source: Windows 7 Vista
posted by penguin7710
User: I'm a unicorn.


Cleverbot: My boyfriend is a dragon.


User: So you're a girl?


Cleverbot: Yes.


User: Cool. So am I.


Cleverbot: And what do 你 play?

User: Unicorn games.

Cleverbot: Like twilight sparkle?

User: Sure.

Cleverbot: Do 你 know israel?

User: Do 你 like singing.

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: We should sing.

Cleverbot: Ok, where?

User: F is for 老友记 who do stuff together.

Cleverbot: B is for basket to put stuff in.

User: A is for apes to kill rapist.

Cleverbot: Apples.

User: Bannanas.

Cleverbot: 苹果 not bananas.

User: Carrots.

Cleverbot: Pineaples.

User: For a robot 你 don't know how to spell.

Cleverbot:...
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1.SpongeBob SqaurePants
2.The Legend of Korra
3.Aaahh!!!Real Monsters
4.The Ren and Stimpy Show
5.(Impractical)Jokers
6.Resturant:Impossible
7.Family Guy
8.Pranked!
9.Tanked
10.Max and Ruby(Just to make fun of it)
11.Adventure Time
12.Regular Show
13.MAD
14.Scrubs
15.Everybody Hates Chris
16.That 70s' Show
17.All That
18.Kenan and Kel
19.My Cat From Hell
20.Dogs101
21.Ellen
22.Law and Order
23.Judge Judy
24.Judge Mathis
25.Judge Ross
26.The Wonder Years
27.My Little Pony:Friendship is Magic
28.Rocko's Modern Life
29.Phineis and Ferb
30.Hey,Arnold!

NOTE:Listed in no particular order.
1 = Tap your pencil continuously on your 台, 办公桌 或者 forehead.

2 = If 你 have long hair, flip it in someones face.

3 = Keep on shifting your chair.

4 = Keep on whispering Hi.

5 = Tell them after class "They know now". Trust me it scares them.

6 = Ask them where they live..

7 = Ask them if they watch America's 下一个 最佳, 返回页首 Model every day.

8 = Ask them every 日 to sit 下一个 to them at lunch, but at lunch say 你 were just kidding.

9 = Have a sleepover with them and do nothing.

10 = Ask them if KFC serves 比萨, 比萨饼 every Friday.

11 = Poke them in the back if they won't move.

12 = Say "I like your hair" in a creepy way.

13 = Ask them if they have ever been drunk.

14 = Ask if they are on Myspace. If they are, then say they have no life.
posted by koolamelia
1. Specify that your drive-thru order is "to go."

2. If 你 have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

3. Start each meal 由 conspicuously licking all your food, and announce that this is so no one will "swipe your grub."

4. Name your dog "Dog."

5. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."

6. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what 你 think."

7. Claim that 你 must always wear a bicycle 头盔 as part of your "astronaut training."

8. Follow a few paces behind someone, spraying everything...
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1.where 你 keep yOUR diary!!
2.if u r on your peroid 或者 nawt!!
3.Who 你 talk 2 on the phone
4.THat 你 are super jelous 或者 other girls (or boys)
5.That 你 hate most of his family.
6.THat when a crisi comes up 你 will run to him
7.What yuor style is!!
8.That like to watch scary movies(LOL)
9.That 你 have an internet profile.
10.AND the last your cell number!! OMG they practliy break the phone!!!
11.How smart 你 are at fixing things.


GIRLS STAY KEWL,BEAUTYFUL, and if any guys try to break tht BREAK THEYRE FACe!!!!
 I cartooned myself and this is wat i got!!!
I cartooned myself and this is wat i got!!!
posted by j-bfan7
Edward pulled two tickets out of his 涂层, 外套 pocket with an unusually questionable grin on his face. I hadn’t seen this expression before. His eyes were bigger than normal, and black. I could see that he needed to hunt. His head tilted slightly downwards, and while one side of his lips curled up, somehow the other side seemed to curl down. Edward looked as though he didn’t know if he wanted to smile, 或者 frown.

“Are those plane tickets?” It sounded 更多 eager out loud than it did in my head.

Edward shifted his dark gaze down at the two tickets he held between his long, porcelain-like fingers,...
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1. Cause it felt like it.

2. mayb it wanted 2. EVR THINK OF THAT!!!!!????

3. It wanted 2 make chiken soup

4. it wanted some chiken soup.

5. it needed 2 get to the other side

6. it saw Justin Bieber (all chickens r 粉丝 of him u no)

7. on the other side of the road was a KFC

8. the ppl on his side kept asken Y did the chicken 交叉, 十字架 the road

9. he had reasons 2

10. he was lost

11. he wanted to make this joke

12. he wanted 2 bcome famous with this joke.

P.S. i coodnt member the rest of the original joke!lol
posted by yoshifan1976
Once there was a black Yoshi named Bob. He was new to town and didn't have any friends. He was a kind and caring Yoshi who had the power to heal. He went to school and saw a group of Yoshis. Bob asked the other Yoshis if he could play with them. The other Yoshis laughed and scoffed at him. He didn't get angry. He just walked away with his head to the ground. Then suddenly, a human was very very sick. She was taken to the hospital. The doctors couldn't admit her. There was nothing they could do. "Yoshi", he said. It meant let me heal her. Then out of the blue, Bob laid his hand on her chest and there was a light shining. Then the human was cured!!! "Thank you", she said. "Yoshi". (Which means you're welcome). The other Yoshis saw what was going on and they apologized to Bob in Yoshi. He forgave them and then they played tag. Then no one ever teased Bob again. He had new 老友记 and they lived happily ever after.
posted by Shelly_McShelly
Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the 最佳, 返回页首 of a 75 story sky scraper. After a long 日 of meetings they were shocked to hear that the elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Bill 说 to Jim and Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task 由 concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can tell sad stories the rest of the way. At the 26th floor Bill stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing. At the 51st floor Jim stopped 唱歌 and Scott began to tell sad stories. "I will tell my saddest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car!"
Almost every week, BBC publishes 10 things we learn every week. Here are the facts from this week.

1. iPhones are not yet sold in China.

2. Margaret Thatcher suffered one Parliamentary defeat as Prime Minister - on Sunday trading laws.

3. English holidaymakers drink an average of eight alcoholic drinks a day.

4. The UK population grew in 更多 2008 than at any time since 1962.

5. Meanwhile, Germany's population is shrinking.

6. West Ham's stadium is really called the Boleyn Ground, not Upton Park.

7. The smell of cut 草 makes people happy.

8. A pint glass lasts an average of only three months.

9. An Englishman sailed to the "New World" only two years after the first European is thought to have landed in Newfoundland.

10. Men in China cannot marry until they are 22.

Hopefully there will be 更多 下一个 week.
added by LovableXNerd
Source: 谷歌
Lyrics:
Halloween night 1963
In haddenfield illinois there would be
A gruesome case of sibling rivalry
Beetween kids in the myers family
Micheal a six 年 old lesurely
walked into his sisters room silently
And butchered her body so violently
he left for a mental facility
and when the state hospital deputy
relaxed the maximum security
and micheal would stop waiting patiantly
for another chance at a murder spree
his doctor sam loomis tried legally
to put him away for eternity
said "my patient has no humanity"
but others did not exactly agree
they 说 "micheal was the epitome of the ideal patients activity
no...
continue reading...
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Holiday Inn, Charlestown South Carolina

Three women arrived in a Chevrolet Cruze. Two were sitting up front, while one was in the back seat.

Cara: *Gets out of the car with Edith* We'll be right back. We need to get something important.
Edith: Leave the engine running.
Charlotte: *Nods. She watches the women walk into the hotel, then picks up her phone to talk to her mother*
Mom: Hello?
Charlotte: Hi Mom, 夏洛特 here.
Mom: How are 你 doing?
Charlotte: Good. I made a couple of new friends, and I just became a member of this group called Social Justice Warriors.
Mom: Congratulations darling. I need...
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