随意 Article: 20 ways to 爱情 a horse goodly:)

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posted by NarutoCrypt

•    HUG it daily
•    Be nice and pet it when it is feeling emotional
•    Kiss it twice everyday
•    Play patty cake with it fiercely
•    Don’t cuss in your house
•    Give it an even number of baths everyday (You better be listening!)
•    Don’t let it watch educational television
•    Enter the room with a bow ,when 你 visit your 马 dormitory
•    Don’t ever scare it 或者 tease it with yarn ( not even your cat)
•    Don’t let it interact with other male 马 (no matter the gender of your horse)
•    Tickle it responsively
•    Don’t tell it bad jokes
•    Let it play with ONLY BIG children 或者 adults (that is for the safety of the horse’s guilt and the safety of your child)
•    Check it’s ears daily
•    Let your horse blog on any computer it wants
•    Give it only “great value” brand of crackers 或者 cheese
•    Do not continually talk to it (it will annoy your horse)
•    Never play an electric 吉他 around it
•    Cue the horse’s bath time properly
•    Never shake your horse! (bad ,bad ,bad)

deathding, DramaQueen1020 and 2 others like this

r-pattz Excellent.

NarutoCrypt lol thanx!

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Toxic Song Reviews! Episode 2-Jason Derulo: Trumpets.

posted by deathding

(WARNING: Profanity OUT OF THE WAZOO! Viewer discretion advised. Also, pie.)

(I will drive 你 to madness 由 letting 你 figure out why the heck I 说 pie. ;D)

Here's a trick question, what's one plus one? ^___^

JASON DERULO SUCKS.

Seriously, I don't mean to be mean, (BAD PUNS FTW!) But Jason Derulo.... He's not good. Almost every song he made is either bland, lame, forgettable, 或者 perverted as hell.

Some MASTERPIECES he made include Talk Dirty, In My Head, and......

Wiggle Wiggle. :P

(WHAT THE MOTHER FUCKING FUCK!?)

And then there's..... This song, I wouldn't call it Jason's worst song, but it's...

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Digital cg art

added by Rodz

Source: wallcoo.net

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R.I.P. Mermaid Man

added by LovingParisJ

Source: 谷歌 & Tumblr

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LOL-SO TRUE!

added by 050801090907

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随意 stuff I found on my computer.

added by kaboomgirl

Bitch,please

added by Usui--takumi

Source: Image

3

black 天鹅 movie

added by alizoula

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funny ways to annoy people/funny pranks

posted by akatsuki_lover9

Ways to Annoy:
1.say a 随意 word for no reason all the time.
2.put spicy stuff in a 食物 they like.
3.make a loud farting noise from your mouth and say "uh oh, i sharted."
4.make a farting noise from your mouth and blame it on the guy 下一个 to you.
5.go to a drive thru, get your face right up to the speaker and yell as loud as 你 can.
6.make a REALLY annoying noise all the time.
7.Write using only crayons, markers and paint.
8.When guests are at your house go into the 厨房 and come out with ketchup all over 你 and say "THE BOOGIE MAN IS HERE!" a bunch of times.
9.in school if there's a problem...

21

"I wasn't that drunk......"

posted by awesomeblossom1

Here's some of my fave "I wasnt that drunk" jokes hope 你 like :)
"I wasn't that drunk"
"You saw a ginger girl eating blueberries and screamed 'No Foxface! Not the berries!'"
"You ran into Walmart and when 你 heard someone talking on the intercom, 你 fell to your knees and said, 'God has spoken!'"
"You grabbed my parakeet, threw it at my sisters piggy bank and yelled, 'ANGRY BIRDS!!!!!'"
"You told me to give 你 a ride 首页 and the part was at your house"
"You asked your girlfriend if she was single"
"You gave a midget a 蘑菇 and yelled 'GROW MARIO GROW!!!'"
"You were cutting open pineapples...

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40 Things Boys Should NEVER do in a Relationship

posted by jayjay4life

1. Don't EVER tell us to CALM DOWN when we're angry. We hate that, and it often makes the situation worse.
2. Don't act like 你 know what you're talking about when 你 don't. It just pisses us off.
3. Don't treat us badly and with disrespect.
4. Don't give us commands like we're some kind of dog. We're your equal and should be treated as such.
5. Sure, you're the guy, so 你 can act like you're the stronger one... Whatever... But, don't EVER act like you're the head of the house. Relationships are to be an equal situation.
6. Don't yell at us when we do something wrong.
7. When 你 screw up, don't...

3

Official Funniest Jokes Of All Time!!!

posted by Shelly_McShelly

Researchers in the UK examined 更多 than 1000 jokes and placed them before 36,000 voters to determine the "official" 50 funniest jokes of all time.

And here they are:

50. I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'. So I went - and I got it.

49. A 密封 walks into a club...

48. Went to the corner 商店 - bought 4 corners.

47. So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants, it was Wedgie Kray.

46. I'll tell 你 what I 爱情 doing 更多 than anything: trying to pack myself in a small suitcase. I can hardly contain myself.

45. I tried water polo...

35

63 Ways to Piss Off a Cop

posted by milorox18

1. When 你 get pulled over, say “What’s wrong, ossifer, there’s no blood in my alcohol?”

2. When he asks why 你 were speeding, tell him 你 wanted to race.

3. When he talks to you, pretend 你 are deaf.

4. If he asks if 你 knew how fast 你 were going, say no, my speedometer only goes to……

5. Ask if 你 can see his gun.

6. When he says 你 aren’t allowed, tell him I just wanted to see if mine was bigger.

7. Touch him.

8. When he asks why 你 were speeding, tell him 你 had to buy a hat.

9. Ask him where he bought his cool hat.

10. Refer to him 由 his first name.

11. Pretend 你 are gay...

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Funny Bumper Sticker Quotes...

posted by Mallory101

" Watch out for the idiot behind me!"
Moooooove, I'm trying to speed!
If you're rich, I’m single!
0-60 in 15 minutes!
A clean car is a sign if sick mind.
100% Irony Free
Adrenalin is my drug of choice.
Adults are just kids with money.
Baby on bored
HOME SCHOOL. Smarter than ever.
I talk to strangers
I Think Feminists Are Cute!
Keep honking, I am reloading!
Pain is inevitable misery is optional.
To All 你 Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.
Tennis players have fuzzy balls.
Your honor student deals the best drugs.

The fastest way to a fisherman's 心 is through his fly
Stupidity is not a crime so you’re...

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18 Fun Things to do in a Final Exam That Does not Matter (ie, 你 are going to fail no matter what)

posted by slytherin360

found this on the net:

18 Fun Things To Do In A Final That Does Not Matter (i.e. 你 are going to fail the class completely no matter what 你 get on the final exam)

1) Get the copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!"

2) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read 问题 aloud, 辩论 your 答案 with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure 你 can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3) Bring cheerleaders.

4) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five 分钟 into it, loudly say to the...

163

24 Fun Things To Do on the Elevator

posted by slytherin360

Found this on the net:

24 Fun Things To Do In An Elevator

1. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of 你 just shut UP!"

2. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly.

3. Crack open your 公文包或者 purse, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?"

4. Offer name 标签 to everyone getting on the elevator. Wear yours upside-down.

5. Stand silent and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.

6. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act embarrassed when they...

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Annoying Things To Say To Other People

posted by BellaCullen96

Check out this infected canker sore in my mouth!
I work for the IRS.
Have 你 ever tried cat meat?
I don't know why I ate it - liver and onions always gives me gas.
I just had a proctological exam - wow, worth every penny!
The last time my head rang like this I woke up with a dead man 下一个 to me!
I puked on the last person who flew 下一个 to me.
My butt reeeally itches!
Would 你 look at the size of the hair I just yanked out of my nose!
My psychiatrist says that flying helps offset my desire to mutilate small, defenseless, woodland creatures.
The last guy who ignored me is still on a respirator....

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Fun and Probably Dangerous things to do when it snows!!!!

posted by llamalover565

Okay so if 你 live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!

1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The 下一个 day, cut the balloons off and 你 got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when 你 can barely 移动 as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...

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Reverse thinspo

added by loonybug

Source: tumblr

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Daniel Browning Smith ♥

added by RoohWinchester

Source: 谷歌

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Brother & Sister

added by SylarNight

Source: made 由 SylarNight