Even though I heard the news yesterday, I was only able to finish this 文章 now.

Well, I just found out about Zayn leaving One Direction because my England friend Katie texted me at 3:40 saying "Did 你 hear about 1D?" I replied saying "No, what is it?" Katie's response: "We well, 你 probably won't like this news at all....but...erm...." Me: "What. Is. It??" Katie: "Zayn out of 1D...quit....:(" My reaction: "NOOO!!!!Y?!?" I couldn't believe it. I immediately went to the One Direction 粉丝 Club on here and sure enough, all the 更新 were about Zayn leaving 1D. I was in shock. Then, I legit started crying. And this happened when I was in play rehearsal for our Drama Club spring play of The Comedy Of Romeo And Juliet Kinda Sorta.

My 老友记 were looking at me wondering "What's wrong with her?" I just simply showed them the 文章 about Zayn on my Chromebook and started to sob harder. My breath was making that sound when 你 get choked up after crying for a long time. My 老友记 then surrounded me, trying to calm me down, and that got the attention of one of the Drama Club advisors, Grace, who's a Junior at my high school(I'm a Freshmen, a 9th grader. Grace was in 11th grade). She came over and asked why I was crying. My friend Kathryn told her what I had 说 and she 说 "Carolyn, there's still 4 other hot guys in the band. 你 should still be able to enjoy the 音乐会 in the summer." My eyes went wide after she 说 that. I hadn't even thought of the concert. That made me shake and cry harder. I couldn't even speak with how much I was crying.

I had to leave the room to go out into the hall during the end scene we were practicing(I'm in Chorus), so my friend had to cover for me while I tried to cool down. I had gone to the bathroom, blowing my nose, while I had tears running down my face. I looked at myself in the mirror. My face was red and my eyes puffy. I was sniffing so much that my nose was running. I have to be completely honest: I felt like crap. I had left the bathroom and got a drink from the bubbler, and went to the 墙 where the door was where everyone was. I pressed my back against the lockers and slid down to the floor and put my head in my legs and cried harder.

When I went back into the room, my 老友记 looked at me, the same expression in their eyes: are 你 ok? I still wasn't ok. Some of my 老友记 came over and hugged me. I went back to where my backpack, Chromebook, and iPhone were and I started texting my friend Nicki about the news. I sent her a pic of what I looked like, and she 说 "OMG, u really r crying! Carolyn it's ok!!" But I wasn't ok. My night still wasn't any better after that.

(March 26, 2015)
Now, I just got to school today. I was done being at my locker and I had gone to get a drink. I was walking past a big group of boys that always hang at the edge of the Freshmen hallway and an annoying boy, Jared, who also likes One Direction, he came up to me while I was listening to my 《冰雪奇缘》 music, since I was still sad. He motioned with a finger for me to take my earbud out. He asked if I had heard about 1D. I started crying AGAIN. He was trying to tell me that One Direction was still there, but he was interrupted 由 my friend Alyssa, who used to be in my 1st 小时 class, Modern World History. She 说 "Don't talk about One Direction right now!! There's still people that are upset." She looked at me and 说 "Like Carolyn. Can't 你 be quiet right now Jared?" I 说 to her "I only found out about it yesterday from my England friend texting me the news." Alyssa started crying as well and we went up to each other and hugged each other while still crying. Jared still was trying to talk to me, but I wouldn't listen.

I'm still not over it. I can't even look at my 1D posters, books, listen to their songs on my phone, 或者 wearing any 1D shirts without looking at Zayn and start sobbing. I've taken this news badly. I don't know when I'll recover from this. Even the group of boys were looking at me when I was crying when Jared was 下一个 to me. And I know those boys, which made it worse!! I couldn't look any of them in the eye. And I know that 3 of those boys are gonna be on me about in in 4th hour, Exploring Science. I can't take this anymore, my life...over. If only Zayn left the band until AFTER the On The Road Again Tour 2015, then I wouldn't be so heartbroken. </3 :'(