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posted by rose2
"House M.D.: The Jerk (#3.23)" (2007)
Dr. Robert Chase: [while giving Nate mushrooms] Nate, how's the pain?
Nate: Hey, it's Skippy, the 衬套, 布什 kangaroo!
Dr. Robert Chase: Your head, Nate. We need to know how the pain is.
Nate: What I got here is the opposite of pain.
Dr. Allison Cameron: That means you're suffering from cluster headaches which means hopefully...
[Nate looks at Cameron]
Nate: [laughs] Man, you're hot!
[turns to Chase]
Nate: She's making me horny.
Dr. Robert Chase: Deal with it.
Nate: Hey, hey, hey, hey. 你 can't get me stoned then not close the deal.
Dr. Robert Chase: [under his breath] God, shut up.
Dr. Allison Cameron: [to Chase] Take it easy, he's not well.
Nate: [laughs] You'll regret saying no. Check it out.
[Nate opens his 袍, 礼服 exposing himself to Chase and Cameron]
Dr. Robert Chase: [disgusted tone] Oh, for God's sake!

Dr. Allison Cameron: Where's Foreman?
Dr. Gregory House: He's mad at me.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Why?
Dr. Gregory House: No reason.
Dr. Robert Chase: [scoffs] Yeah, that makes sense.

Dr. James Wilson: Cuddy thinks I sabotaged Foreman's interview. She's gonna 火, 消防 me.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I don't believe it.
Dr. James Wilson: She 说 it was unprofessional and...
Dr. Allison Cameron: No, I mean I literally don't believe it. Cuddy wouldn't 火, 消防 你 for something like that.
[Wilson looks guilty]
Dr. Allison Cameron: Which means either she lied to 你 或者 you're lying to me.
Dr. James Wilson: 你 so would have fallen for that three years ago.
Dr. Allison Cameron: 你 were looking for a reaction. 你 were looking for me to feel bad for you, save your skin. But how am I gonna save you? Unless 你 think I'm the one who really did it.
Dr. James Wilson: Cuddy's logic was Foreman's valuable to House. I care about House. Ergo, I would do anything to save him.
Dr. Allison Cameron: And your logic was I care about House as much as 你 do, ergo...
[Wilson nods]
Dr. Allison Cameron: It wasn't me. I don't care about House.
Dr. James Wilson: I don't believe you.
Dr. Allison Cameron: No one does. House is nothing 更多 than my boss, Foreman's nothing 更多 than a colleague.
Dr. James Wilson: [nods his head] You're lying.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Everyone does, but it wasn't me.
Dr. James Wilson: [nods and leaves]

Dr. Allison Cameron: Foreman's interview in New York got screwed up.
Dr. Robert Chase: I heard.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Foreman thought it was House, House thought it was Cuddy, Cuddy thought it was Wilson, Wilson thought it was me.
[stares accusingly at Chase]
Dr. Robert Chase: And 你 think it was me?
[chuckles]
Dr. Robert Chase: God, 你 think I sabotaged Foreman? I don't even want him here.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I know.
Dr. Robert Chase: Then why would I do...?
Dr. Allison Cameron: I think 你 sabotaged Foreman just to sabotage Foreman.
Dr. Robert Chase: So everyone's a suspect because everyone wants to help House, except for me. I'm a suspect because I'm a petty, vindictive jerk?
[Cameron stares at him]
Dr. Robert Chase: 你 actually think I would do something like that?
Dr. Allison Cameron: It was someone.
Dr. Robert Chase: [firm tone] It wasn't me.

Dr. Robert Chase: It's Tuesday.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I know.
Dr. Robert Chase: I like you.
Dr. Allison Cameron: [smiles] I know. See 你 下一个 Tuesday.

Dr. Robert Chase: Blood thinners and TMS had no effect; it’s not cluster headaches.
Dr. Gregory House: 你 accusing the symptoms of lying?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Could be hemacomatosis.
Dr. Gregory House: Wouldn't account for the personality disorder.
Dr. Robert Chase: Hypothyroidism.
Dr. Gregory House: He's not getting aggressive and lethargic, he's getting aggressive and aggressiver.
Dr. Allison Cameron: What about ruptured dermoid cyst?
Dr. Gregory House: [House stumbles backward] Sorry. I just got dizzy there. I was expecting to turn right. Its Foreman's turn to be shot down.
Dr. Eric Foreman: [listlessly] The thing that Cameron said.
Dr. Gregory House: Way to think outside the box. No fat in the ventricles. It’s cluster headaches.
Dr. Robert Chase: Normal treatment didn't work. Abnormal treatment didn't work.
Dr. Gregory House: Good point, Foreman. The normal treatments don't always work. Symptoms never lie.
Dr. Allison Cameron: The only approved treatment left for cluster headaches is brain surgery and that's not even a guarantee.
Dr. Gregory House: Back off, Foreman!

"House M.D.: Clueless (#2.15)" (2006)
Maria Palko: Marriages don't fail because couples get bored. They fail because, while they're dating, people pretend to be the person they think their partner wants and then - well, there's only so long 你 can keep that up.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Maybe they are that person when they're dating, but then they change.
Maria Palko: People thinking their partner will change? That's another reason marriages fail. People don't change. At least not in any way that really matters.

Dr. Allison Cameron: He's gonna need a lung transplant.
Dr. Gregory House: He's becoming 更多 attractive 由 the minute, isn't he?
Dr. Allison Cameron: You're pleased. 你 think you've proved every marriage is a mistake?
Dr. Gregory House: Do I look pleased?

Dr. Gregory House: Is the ant big and red, 或者 small and black?
Dr. Eric Foreman: Medium and brown.
Dr. Gregory House: Halle Berry brown 或者 碧昂斯 brown?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Is there a difference?
Dr. Gregory House: [sarcastically] Is there a difference?

Dr. Allison Cameron: What was I supposed to do, tie her up?
Dr. Gregory House: Why not? She likes that.

Dr. Allison Cameron: If 你 ask me, if two people really trust each other, a threesome once every seven years might actually help a marriage.
[everyone stares at her]
Dr. Gregory House: Okay, I say we stop the DDX and discuss that comment.

Dr. Robert Chase: [about a couple's threesome] Another guy 或者 girl?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Girl. His wife's college roommate.
Dr. Robert Chase: If he's not happily married, I don't know who could be.

"House M.D.: Euphoria: Part 1 (#2.20)" (2006)
[House is discussing a patient's status]
Dr. Gregory House: He has a bullet in his head.
Dr. Cameron: He was shot?
Dr. Gregory House: No, somebody threw it at him.

Dr. Gregory House: He was hit 由 a bullet.
Dr. Cameron: He was shot?
Dr. Gregory House: No, somebody threw it at him.

Dr. Gregory House: God you're weak. Guy tried to kill you. First thing on my 列表 of things do would be to stab him back. Shoot him. Got a gun in my desk. Last thing would be on my 列表 would be to lie to my boss about it and give the bastard everything he wanted.
Dr. Cameron: I'm not here for Foreman, I'm here to save myself.
Dr. Gregory House: Eh... Even with a needle stick your chances of infection are pretty slim. That's why you're wearing the suit. 你 wanted to be here. He just gave 你 the excuse. What does that guy have to do to make 你 hate him?

Dr. Gregory House: Whoa! You're ready to sacrifice yourself for a guy that doesn't consider 你 a friend?
Dr. Cameron: He's just a patient right? It's the job.

Dr. Cameron: The chance of infection is 下一个 to nothing.
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah, I was never that great at math, but 下一个 to nothing is higher than nothing, right?

"House M.D.: Daddy's Boy (#2.5)" (2005)
Dr. Allison Cameron: Why does he hate seeing his parents? So his dad tells the truth, he can't handle that?
Dr. James Wilson: He hates being a disappointment.
Dr. Allison Cameron: He's a doctor, world famous! How disappointed can they be?
Dr. James Wilson: 你 know what I figure is worse than watching your son become crippled? Watching him be miserable.

Dr. Cameron: Why would 你 need $5,000?
Dr. Robert Chase: Bad night at poker 或者 a great night with a hooker.
Dr. Gregory House: Thank 你 for saving me the trouble of deflecting that personal 问题 with a joke.

Dr. Allison Cameron: You're not curious?
Dr. Robert Chase: I'm curious about crocs, but I don't stick my head in their mouths.

Dr. Gregory House: Well, there's the fever that Cameron was looking for.
Dr. Allison Cameron: We knew if it was myelitis there had to be an -itis. This must be the infection that set it off.
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah. Except in this universe effect follows cause. I've complained about it, but...

Dr. Gregory House: [on phone] Ok, Mom. Bye.
[hangs up]
Dr. Allison Cameron: Who was that?
Dr. Gregory House: Angelina Jolie. I call her "Mom." Who thinks that's hot?

"House M.D.: Insensitive (#3.14)" (2007)
Dr. Robert Chase: Happy Valentine's Day.
Dr. Allison Cameron: A holiday that only applies to people who are already paired up. For everyone else, it's Wednesday.
Dr. Robert Chase: Wow. Thank 你 for that dash of cold water.

Dr. Allison Cameron: 你 weren't shot because of pain, 你 were shot because you're a jerk.
Dr. Gregory House: Some think the two are connected.

Dr. Eric Foreman: Maybe Cuddy will say no.
Dr. Robert Chase: Cuddy never says no.
Dr. Allison Cameron: That's not true.
Dr. Robert Chase: Nobody ever says no. We don't say no.
Dr. Eric Foreman: 你 don't say no.
Dr. Eric Foreman: He'll come back, he'll browbeat us, he'll give us seven reasons, and eventually we'll fold. We all will, not just me.

Dr. Allison Cameron: [matter-of-factly] So I'm thinking we should have sex.
Dr. Robert Chase: [confused] That makes sense?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Despite the wisdom of pop songs, there's no sense in putting our lives on hold till 爱情 comes along. We're both healthy and busy people. We work together so it's convenient...
Dr. Robert Chase: Like microwave pizza?
Dr. Allison Cameron: And of all the people I work with, you're the one I'm least likely to fall in 爱情 with.
Dr. Robert Chase: Like microwave pizza.

"House M.D.: TB 或者 Not TB (#2.4)" (2005)
Dr. Gregory House: 你 want third-world treatment?
[turns up the thermostat]
Dr. Gregory House: 你 got it. Boy, is it hot here in Jani!
Dr. Allison Cameron: What are 你 doing?
Dr. Gregory House: What am I doing?
[he knocks Sebastian's things onto the floor]
Dr. Gregory House: Putting everything on the floor of the hut. Uh oh, wicked magic box with the moving pictures!
Dr. Allison Cameron: 你 think he's a hypocrite?
Dr. Gregory House: [unplugging the TV] Hypocrite? No, everyone in Africa's got cell phones 或者 running water.
[he has dropped Sebastian's cellphone into the toilet]
Dr. Gregory House: This thing just will not flush.
Sebastian Charles: Do 你 really think that if 你 come in here and make it a little hot, make it smell a little, that I'm just going to fold and abandon everything that matters to me?
Dr. Gregory House: [wiping his cane on Sebastian's blanket] Lousy sanitation over there, too. 你 are not the same as them, your life is not the same. And 你 are cheapening everything they're going through 由 pretending 你 are.

Dr. Gregory House: [knowing the famous Dr. Sebastian Charles has asked Cameron out] Are 你 gonna go out with him?
Dr. Cameron: Is that any of your business?
Dr. Gregory House: Nope.
Dr. Cameron: [pauses] I don't think so.
Dr. Gregory House: Two days ago, 你 were holding his hand. What's changed?
Dr. Cameron: He practically lives in Africa. There's no future.
Dr. Gregory House: On the other hand, maybe there's too much of a future now. 你 weren't attracted to him because he was prepared to die for a cause, 你 were attracted to him because he was actually doing it.
Dr. Cameron: [scoffs] Right. It's that simple.
Dr. Gregory House: That was simple?
Dr. Cameron: I put a label on them and go from there.
Dr. Gregory House: Everybody does it. We are who people think we are. People think he's a great doctor so they give him stuff.
Dr. Cameron: He is a great doctor.
Dr. Gregory House: The reality is irrelevant.

Dr. Allison Cameron: 你 were wrong.
Dr. Gregory House: Hey! I have feelings. I'm trying.

Dr. Allison Cameron: He asked me out.
Dr. Robert Chase: [not shocked] Shocked. I'm shocked when patients don't ask 你 out.
Dr. Allison Cameron: He also asked me to come to Africa.
Dr. Robert Chase: Wow. He moves fast...

"House M.D.: Need to Know (#2.11)" (2006)
Dr. Gregory House: This better be important.
Dr. Cameron: You've gotta come back in.
Dr. Gregory House: No, I don't.
Dr. Cameron: Margo's stable, but...
Dr. Gregory House: Oh my God! I'll be right there!

Dr. Allison Cameron: 你 won't read your mail, but you'll open mine.
Dr. Gregory House: It was confidential. I wanted to know.
Dr. Allison Cameron: The most important letter of my life and you're still an ass.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Comforting, isn't it?

[House hands Cameron a sealed envelope, which she assumes is her HIV test results]
Dr. Gregory House: Knowing is always better than not knowing.
Dr. Allison Cameron: [opens the envelope and reads the letter] It's a referral request.
Dr. Gregory House: [holds up an open envelope] Right. HIV thing came in earlier. You're fine.
Dr. Allison Cameron: [incensed] 你 won't read your mail, but you'll open mine?
Dr. Gregory House: It 说 confidential. I wanted to know.
Dr. Allison Cameron: The most important letter of my life, and you're still an ass.
Dr. Gregory House: Comforting, isn't it?
[she walks out on him]

Dr. Robert Chase: Millions of women are on fertility treatments, and they don't get cancer.
Dr. Gregory House: Right. They get babies. She had a blood clot and a stroke. She'll get another one and probably die if we don't find that tumor. Do an endometrial biopsy.
Dr. Eric Foreman: Biopsy's painful and unnecessary. We just did an ultrasound.
Dr. Gregory House: [squints and looks at his watch]
Dr. Eric Foreman: What?
Dr. Gregory House: Shh.
Dr. Cameron: If 你 have a personal issue that's interfering with...
Dr. Gregory House: [interrupts] Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
Dr. Eric Foreman: What are we waiting for?
Dr. Gregory House: Your four weeks just expired. Your reign of terror is over. Mine has just begun. Now go stick a needle up her hoo-hoo and find that cancer.
[goes into his office]
Dr. Eric Foreman: [shakes his head and smiles]
Dr. Robert Chase: [looks confused] Hoo-hoo?
Dr. Eric Foreman: He went to Hopkins.

"House M.D.: Autopsy (#2.2)" (2005)
Dr. Gregory House: We've got a patient who for no obvious reason is hallucinating. Since it's not obvious, I thought we'd go with subtle.
Dr. Allison Cameron: It doesn't matter. If her sat percentage is off, that means her blood isn't getting enough oxygen; that's a problem with her lungs, not her heart.
Dr. Eric Foreman: And a lung problem isn't causing hallucinations.
Dr. Robert Chase: But the lungs could lead us somewhere that is.
Dr. Gregory House: Welcome to the end of the thought process.

Dr. Gregory House: And *you* stay away from the patient.
Dr. Allison Cameron: What'd I do?
Dr. Gregory House: Oh well, you'd just get all warm and cuddly around the dying girl and insinuate yourself; end up in a custody battle.

Dr. Gregory House: She's a rock.
Dr. Allison Cameron: She's brave.
Dr. Gregory House: Yeah, yeah, yeah...

"House M.D.: 爱情 Hurts (#1.20)" (2005)
Dr. Allison Cameron: I want to know how 你 feel... about me.
Dr. Gregory House: 你 live under the delusion that 你 can fix everything that isn't perfect. That's why 你 married a man who was dying of cancer. 你 don't love, 你 need. And now that your husband is dead, you're looking for your new charity case. That's why you're going out with me. I'm twice your age, I'm not great looking, I'm not charming, I'm not even nice. What I am is what 你 need... I'm damaged.

Dr. James Wilson: I just want to make sure no one gets hurt.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I will be fine. Everyone's 表演 like I'm going out with Jack the Ripper.
Dr. James Wilson: Oh, it's not - it's not 你 I'm worried about.
[Cameron looks at him quizzically]
Dr. James Wilson: It's been a long time since he opened up to someone and I - 你 better be *absolutely* sure 你 want this because if he opens up again and gets hurt - I don't think there's going to be a 下一个 time.
Dr. Allison Cameron: You're worried I'm going to break *his* heart?

Dr. Allison Cameron: [to Foreman and Chase] I'm *allowed* to sexually harass my boss.

"House M.D.: Living the Dream (#4.14)" (2008)
Dr. Gregory House: We don't need to wait for a reflex. If he can't get engorged the way God intended, he can't get engorged.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I'm not 展示 him my boobs.
Dr. Gregory House: Lack of response to your chest tells us nothing.
Dr. Gregory House: [turns to Thirteen] Thirteen 显示 him yo...
Dr. Gregory House: [exhales] Where can I find a decent set of knockers around here?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Your porn's in the 秒 drawer.

Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Why is House driving a limo?
Dr. Eric Foreman: Don't know.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Don't have to know.
Dr. Robert Chase: Don't... care?
Dr. Lisa Cuddy: Wrong! Until this inspection is over, you're back on House-watch!

Dr. Gregory House: 你 want to be here.
Dr. Allison Cameron: I have to be here.
Dr. Gregory House: Just say the word, I'll 火, 消防 Thirteen.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Just sign the forms.
Dr. Gregory House: Smart move, I was bluffing.

"House M.D.: Euphoria: Part 2 (#2.21)" (2006)
Dr. Allison Cameron: [House wants to know why Foreman's disease is progressing much faster than Joe's] ... Foreman's black.
Dr. Gregory House: What? How long have 你 been sitting on this information?

Dr. Allison Cameron: I'm not sure, I didn't have my thesaurus with me.

[Foreman is dying and House has no clue what's killing him, so he told his team to treat for everything they can think of]
Dr. Allison Cameron: You'll box his liver, trash his kidneys. There's gotta be a better way.
Dr. Gregory House: Of *course* there’s a better way!

"House M.D.: Hunting (#2.7)" (2005)
Dr. Robert Chase: I thought you'd change your mind on getting those drinks.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Come on in.
Dr. Robert Chase: There's this new place on campus.
[Cameron kisses him]
Dr. Robert Chase: Are 你 high?
Dr. Allison Cameron: Uh-huh.
[kissing him again]
Dr. Robert Chase: I thought they disposed of the drugs.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Not all of them.
[unbuttoning Chase's shirt]
Dr. Robert Chase: Slow down. Your pupils are dilated.
Dr. Allison Cameron: Come on, Chase, don't be a good guy on me now.
[kisses him]

Dr. Allison Cameron: I have fun.
Dr. Robert Chase: She has some scheduled for February.

Dr. Allison Cameron: So, 你 always use a condom?
Dr. Eric Foreman: Uhh, yeah.
Dr. Gregory House: Brother's on the low-down, got to.
Dr. Eric Foreman: I'm not ready for any Foreman juniors yet.
Dr. Allison Cameron: You?
Dr. Gregory House: Working girls, they're sticklers. You're not going to 民意调查 Chase?
Dr. Robert Chase: I'm not an idiot.
Dr. Gregory House: Obviously not. Who doesn't sleep with a drugged-out colleague when they have a chance.
added by laurik2007
Source: fox.com & drhouse-forum.de
added by wendus94
Source: FOX/DrHouse-Forum.De
added by Arminl25
Source: SpoilerTV
added by House34
added by Aivi
Source: AP [or something like that]
added by huddyislove
Source: ironic_sauce @ lj
added by Bery
Source: ladyLilHell @ youtobe
added by nikky15
Source: dookielaurie@photobucket
added by nataselli
Source: Hollywood 411 and marykir.com
added by tarabrina
added by lovehousemd_frv
Source: fircyca
added by everybody-lies
Source: Me
added by te35hay
added by BenxLinus
added by HuddyCrazy1331
added by kikuska414
added by Anusha
added by PotterGal
added by Criss42
Source: EW,com