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posted by gossip-girl999
AGE: 16

MOTTO: Everybody dances to their own boom boom.

ABOUT ME: I'm Effy. It's a shit name but it's short for Elizabeth which is even worse. I live with my Mum and Dad. My brother used to live here too but now he's gone. On the 日 he left he gave me his duvet cover, half a bottle of 桃子 Schnapps, and his bedroom. Well, he doesn't need it any 更多 does he? So now it's my kingdom. I drank the Schnapps and gave the duvet to Oxfam.

These are the four most interesting things about me:

1) I can pick stuff up with my toes. Like, not just socks and crap like that but big things. Ketchup bottles. Ashtrays. Ipods. It's a less useful skill than you’d think.

2) My Dad was so angry when I got expelled from the shit school I used to go to that he literally started farting in rage. Gross.

3) I'm distantly related to a 17th century French aristocrat called Cecile DeLacroix. She was beheaded during the French Revolution. Her eyes carried on blinking for 14 秒 after her head was severed from her neck and her lover had her teeth sewn into his pillow.

4) My favourite smell is petrol.

If 你 want to know any 更多 send a stamped addressed envelope and ten pounds to my address

FAVOURITE BAND: No.

T.V SHOWS: TV rots your brain and makes 你 infertile. True story.

FILM STARS: I don't have favourite film stars. Everyone gets old and shit in the end. My favourite film character is the 象, 大象 Man. He's hot.

DREAM DATE: Refer to last question.
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