SATEN TWIST: (short tempered, recovering alcoholic, anti hero)
SCENE 1:
Saten: *drunkily* H 嘿 苹果白兰地
AppleJack: Are ya drunk 或者 something?
Saten: *dizzily* No I'm no- A little
AppleJack: *giggles* Y'all really need some sort of intervention. Ah mean this is the third time this week.
(Suddenly Saten Twist squeeze hugged her, even though it was clear 苹果白兰地 wasn't completely comfortable with it.)
Saten: I I 爱情 你 Applejack. Let's grow old together in everyway. (demonic voice) EVERY-WAY!
AppleJack *trying to push him off her*: Yeah.. About that.. Look. We only been on 'one' date. It didn't even end well,. But since then. Ya showed up at my house four times.. Uninvited.
Saten: Yeah.. So?
AppleJack: Look. Ah don't wanna seem like a mean girl, but. As ah told ya one hundred times before.. We're not a couple. So stop 表演 like we are.
Saten: *dumbly* I I don't understand?
SCENE 2:
Trixie: Thanks for taking me for lunch. Never been to this place.
Saten: Hey. Your a good friend.
Trixie: Thanks. So are you.
Saten: Is it true 你 took down a Ursa Major?
Trixie: No.. I just 说 that for popularity.
Saten Twist: Ohh... (gets angrier) Well your just a big fuckin lier aren't you!
Trixie: (nervously stands up)
Saten: (threateningly points one of the knives) SIT DOWN!
SCENE 3:
Saten: Hey. Nice perfamance.
SweetieBelle: Really!?. Everyone only cares about the stupid dresses. *sudden anger* This always happens! Rarity always outshines me.
Saten: Hey. Siblings do that.. In fact.. When I was your age. I won a ribbin at a science fair, my project was called "do Lima beans nurture under classical music". But my unimpressed mother simply just pointed out that it was a rip off of my older brother's project "do Lima beans grow better in rock and roll". And well.. I ended up losing the ribbon and it was 给 to my stinkin brother.
2 HOURS LATER
Saten: *now angrier* First off, the projects were completely differenty. I was 展示 the classic 音乐 'nurtures' Lima beans. But my stupid mother didn't lesson.. If your like to see the relationship between nurturing and growth, I'd like to point out that my brother is EIGHT INCHES TALLER THAN ME!
Saten: ... Anyway. I hope that helpe- (sees that Sweetie Belle must of ran off quite some time ago)
SCENE 4:
INSIDE A LOCAL BREWERY:
Saten: Fired!? Why am I fired!?
Boss pony: Cause 你 only been here a week, and 你 keep getting drunk on the samples.
Saten: Okay. Not gonna lie.. I 'might' be an acholalic.
Boss pony: *sarcastically* yeaaaah.. Kinda got that. Thanks for clarifying though.
SCENE 5:
Grape: I have to admit.. Derpy is a lot less attractive in person.
Saten: Oh. Is that so?
Grape: Yeah.. But baggers can't be choosers.
Saten: (fake laugh) good one... May I see your pen?
Grape: Uhh., Sure (gives him a pen from his pocket)
Saten: Thanks.. Now. What was that about Derpy?
Grape: That, she's kinda uglier in person.
Saten: I see... (suddenly, and aggressively, stabs the pen into GoldenGrapes leg, much to his intense pain)
Grape: What the fu-
Saten: (sadistically) HOW UGLY IS SHE NOW!?
SCENE 6:
Saten: I found 你 a present!
Twilight: What kinda prese- OH MY GOD!
Saten: *holding live snake* I found her outside. *gives the snake to Twilight. Cause he is too drunk to see her fear of it*
SCENE 7:
Twi: It's just.. 你 don't always seem to have everyone's best interest at heart.
Saten: Everyone's best interest.. Dude! I am a man of dignity!.. (smokes a large glass bong full of marijuana)
SCENE 8:
Saten: I'm Saten Twist.. And your prettier in person.
Luna: Well.. Thank you. But please don't get to close, 你 have bad breath. And a creepy look to you.
Saten: Well.. 你 could of just as easily thanked me for saving your 'royal a-
Celestia and Twilight: (desperately tries to change the subject)
Saten: (still to Luna) Bitch!
SCENE 9:
AJ: Look sugercube.. I'm sorry.. But Ah need ta 移动 on towards bigger, better, things.
Saten: ... Like meth?
AJ: (annoyed) No. Not like me-
Saten: Want some?
AJ: No ah don't wan- WHY DO YA HAVE METH!?
Saten: Relax. I don't use it. I only sell it..
SCENE 10:
Saten: (points at Trenderhoof while talking to AJ) I hear that nerd has a crush on you,
AJ: No need I be jealous.
Saten: Me. Jealous, no way.
AJ: Good because ah have enough to worry abou-
Saten: (to trenderhoof) I'LL KILL YOU!
SCENE 11:
Saten: ... A, Anyway. What 你 say cutie? Wanna be my girlfriend?
Trixie: ... Fine., but on two conditions.
Saten: Only two?.. That's 'already' better then AppleJack.
Trixie: One.. I am traveling a lot. And it dosen't look I'll be in Ponyville for quite some time.. So your have to call me everyday.
Saten: Sure. I can do that, no problem.
Trixie: Two.. 你 let me work on your jealousy.
Saten: What are 你 talking about? I never have jealousy..
Stallion: 嘿 Trixie, nice sho-
Saten: (angrily punches the stallion out cold) SHE'S MINNNE!
SCENE 12:
Waiter: Here are your napkins. (Gives them napkins)
Saten: (notices Trixie has 2 extra ones)
Saten: (sudden anger) Hey! Why dose she get more!?... ARE 你 HITTING ON HER!?
Waiter: Wha-
Saten: (pounds table) I WILL FUCK 你 UP!
Waiter: (runs off in fear)
Trixie: (sighs) Honey, I thought we talked about your jealously?
Saten: I'm trying., but I don't want to end like my father after h-
Waiter 2: (hands Trixie water) Here's your wat-
Saten: (leaps onto him and starts attacking him).
SOON AFTER:
Saten: (is literary thrown out of the restaurant).
SCENE 13:
Therapist: Uhh... Let's just skip into it.. She says 你 hate your dad.. How is he anyway?
Saten: Dead
Therapist: ... And your mother?
Saten: Killed him
Therapist: ... Wanna talk about that?
Saten; Just did
SCENE 14:
Derpy: Fine. Whatever. Just as long as nobody makes fun of.
Saten: Relax. No one is gonna make fun of yo-
Reggie: Hey! Nice eyes Derpy.. Makes 你 look even stupider then before..
Derpy: *whimpers*
Saten: Hey.. Screw off Reggie. Nobody likes you.
Reggie: Screw off.. But I only just started.. (containues making fun of Derpy).
Saten: Whatever.. I'm just trying to put this 刀 away (shows a 面包 knife).
Derpy: It goes in the 厨房 silly (chuckles)
Saten: Thank yo- (suddenly the famish rainboom happened, and it shook the ground causing Saten to loose his balance and unintentionally stab Reggie in the head, instantly killing him)
Derpy: (turning away from window) 嘿 cuz did 你 se- OH MY GOD!
Saten: I'm sorry!
Derpy: Is that Reggie!? DID 你 STAB REGGIE!?
Saten: It was an accident!
Derpy: How can it be an accident!?
Saten: I'M SOR-
SCENE 15:
Saten: So, in conclusion, I believe the painful sensation felt after passing a meal of spicy chillies is proof that the rectum does possess the sense of taste.
Trixie: ... I concur, but 你 changed the subject. What are we doing for hearts and hoove's Day?
Saten: ... Oh, 你 caught that, did you?
SCENE 16:
Trixie: *comes over and finds him*
Bartender: *sees her* Oh wow. She's she's a hottie.. I'm gonna stalk her later.
Saten: ... Are 你 a woman?
Bartender: No.
Saten: Good *punches out the bartender*
-------------------------------------------------------------------
MASTER SWORD: (Slightly insane, but good hearted, anti hero)
SCENE 1
Saten: *laughs* I can't wait to tell my friends!
Master Sword: For the last time! I'm not your friend!.. I never even met you.
Saten: Sure we are. 你 invited me to your birthday.
Master Sword: No. 你 'showed up' at my birthday.. I don't even know how 你 found my house.
Saten: Yeah. Yeah.. So 你 coming to mine?
Master Sword: No I... Fine.
SCENE 2:
Master Sword: *calling out* Don't dieeee!
SCENE 3:
Master sword (as an interviewer): 嘿 princess Twilight. Good having 你 here.
Twilight: Sure.
Sword: First off. How dose it feel being the forth princess ever?
Twilight: (barely even lessoning) Yes. I wouldn't be here without my friends.
Sword: That's nice. But the 问题 is, how dose it make 'you' feel. YOU!?
Twilight: (still barely lessoning) Yes. That is diffently a 问题 being asked. And I'm confident in my friends. And getting it done.
Sword: Okay.. Have to be honest with you. I feel like this interview. Is going absolutely nowhere. 你 answered 'none' of my questions. 你 kinda sound like a broken automatic response system, that's only been tought 4 phrases.
Twilight: (not lessening) Thanks. It's been an experience.
Sword: *annoyed* Yeah it has!
Twilight: *listing stuff about friendship*
Sword: What are yo- *looks behind him* Are 你 阅读 cue cards wait now!?.. What is this!?
Twilight: *still 阅读 off them*
Sword: (proving point to audience) What's your name lady!?
Twilight: .. Dedication.
Sword: (angrily to camera) Her name is dedication!.. 你 know what, (storming off) this interview is over!... *offview* WHERE'S GOD DAMN BEER!?
SCENE 4:
Derpy: Saten. He's not even as dorky as 你 say he is.
Sword: Wha-
Saten: Well.. I still loved pranking him anyway.
Derpy: (laughs) 你 did?..
Saten: Yes.. I remember I use to put fibreglass shards in his gym shorts. Every time he had to take a pee. He'd come back crying. *Saten and Derpy laugh*
Sword: It wasn't funny. It was painful.. Wasn't so much the fiber. As it was the glass!.. I had to get a urethra transplant.. And those are COSTLY!
Sword: 你 should hear his 更多 最近的 ones.. (to Saten) Tell her what 你 did a the other day.
Saten: Well.. I mailed a wild hog to house the other day.
Sword: (angrily) THERE'S GIANT PIG WITH HORNS! LIVING IN THE BASEMENT!
Saten: Plus.. The time before that. We were suppose to have a sleepover at his house., I was planning to sneak laxatives into his cereal.. But the sleep over got canceled so I couldn't get him with that one.
Derpy: Ohh... But the idea was still there.
Saten: Oh! Differently (they highfive)
Sword: (arrogantly) HE DIDN'T GET ME THOUGH! He didn't get me... DidyougetmeSaten? Didyougetme!?
Satan: No-
Sword: No! 你 did not get me!.. Who didn't get me... Saten Twist.
Saten: 你 know what.. Fuck it.. Fine. 你 guys can go out.. But only once.
Sword: Good enough. *leaves*
Sword: Alright Derpy.. Let's go.
Derpy: Fine.
Sword: Just remember one thing tonight. One thing.. Your cousin did NOT get me with poop thing..
SCENE 6:
Saten: (a 年 或者 two ago) Excuse me. I'm looking for the owner this business?
Mare: Wait though there (points at Master Swords office)
Saten: (starting going in).
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought 你 were the mafia.
Saten: N No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. 你 can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
SCENE 7:
Iron will: Welcome. To Iron wills 显示 on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. 你 take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest 小马 in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed 由 Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Know who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
Pony: For god sakes! Have some humility! It'll save your life!
SCENE 8:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken 由 a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before 你 start.
Twilight: 耶稣 christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: 冬青, 冬青树 SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) 你 gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would 爱情 to know why 你 shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
Twilight: Great... So what now.
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: 你 can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... 你 planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: 你 planned this! I know 你 did!
Master Sword: 你 honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) 嘿 Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: 你 would not believe how cheap that elf costume was!
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I 偷了 it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE 圣诞节 MOMENT!
SCENE 9:
Saten finally took a train back to Ponyville.
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me.
Saten: Sword? 你 scared th- Oh shit, did 你 steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of 偷了 it.. Prove.. I did!
SCENE 10:
The cops from 小马 mov: FREEEEZE!
Saten: Oh shit! We're so dead!
Master Sword: Leave it to me... (To the 小马 mov cops), it's alright!.. We're cops!
(Long silence
Sword and Saten are suddenly thrown into a jail cell.
Master Sword: Damn it! I was so so sure that was gonna work!
SCENE 11:
Master Sword: See, told 你 my friend will get us out.
Saten: I guess... He creeps me out though.. He kept asking for an dirty picture of Twilight..
Master Sword: Oh yeah. Same way I have one for your Derpy
Saten: (angrily) WHAT!?
Master Sword: Yeah, have it over my wall-
Saten: (punches Sword in the face).
Master Sword: (holding his bloody nose) still worth it!
SCENE 12:
Derpy: I really messed up on those invitations! I feel just awful!
Master Sword: Why'd 你 bring me to Cake N' 培根 for our third date, I HATE this place!
Derpy: I told Cranky I could get 'em printed for cheap, but that meant hiring somebody with no experience using a printing press... Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
Derpy: Is it possible were having two different conversations?
Sword: How should I know, I'm not listening to you!
SCENE 13:
Dr. Hooves: What's in it for me?
Master Sword: How about the glory of me not breaking your arm for your earlier statement.
Dr. Hooves: All I 说 was she looks a bit slu-
Master Sword: (holds Hoove's arm painfully).
Dr. Hooves: OKAY! OKAY!
Master Sword: (releases).
Dr. Hooves: Shit! That's like some red army shit!
Master Sword: Not really, my dad used it on my 秒 sister.
Dr. Hooves: But 你 don't have a 秒 sister?
Master Sword: Exactly.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
DERPY: (Saten's tomboy and loving cousin., who sometimes takes weed).
SCENE 1:
Filly Derpy: *jumping on bed, but her eyes seen as normal and she dosen't have her cutie mark*
Filly Saten: 嘿 Derp. Quite that already, your gonna hurt yourself.
Filly Derpy: *subbornly* Shut up! Your not the boss of me.. *bangs her head on the roof, making her have the 交叉, 十字架 eyed disign*
Filly Saten: My god, your okay!?
Filly Derpy: *calmly and unaware of her new look* Sure, why do 你 ask?
SCENE 2:
Derpy: Yeah.. 由 the way would 你 watch Dinky for me?
Saten: Well. I'm busy, but I'm sure I ca-
Derpy; Great! *gives him Dinky and flies out one of the windows*
Saten: Find.. Someone else.. *groans*
SCENE 3:
Rainbow: Yeah. Well.. Least I never got my name and voice changed.
Derpy: *gasps* 你 swore you'd never speak of that!
Rainbow: Sure. Whatever 你 say, Ditzy..
SCENE 4:
Derpy: Ahh., here we are at last.. Grand Gollaping Galla.. It's so beauitfu- *bangs into someone*
Aqua: *rudely* Hey. Watch where your going lady.
Derpy: Don't have to be mea-
Aqua: *rudely* Just leave me alone! *leaves*
Derpy: *eyes narrow*
Derpy: *Sudden happiness* This place just gets better and better.
SCENE 5:
Saten: (pulls over the bully to Derpy) Now., apologize.
Pony: Okay.. I'm sorry your she's an idiot.
Saten: Hey!.. I'm gonna ask nicely. That 你 so my lovely cousin a little repect.
Pony: Your cousin.. Man. Your family must be so proud have so such smart ponies.
Saten: fuck 你 man.. This is your last warning.
Derpy: (somewhat annoyed) Cousin.. Just hit him already.
Saten: (evil grin, and grabs a pole like object) Anything for 你 sweetie.. (violently smashes the ponies face in, knocking out a few teeth)
Derpy: Much better..
SCENE 6:
Derpy: (anxiously pacing) Oh.. What if they find us!? I'm too cute for jail!
Saten: Relax.. Go 首页 and put 大麻 into some of your muffins.
Derpy: That's just it.. That's usually how I would handle this type of situation. But.. I'm just too frightened.
SCENE 7:
Derpy: This works out for the best. I was tired of my stupid, dead end job.
CUTAWAY:
Derpy: (literary hammering a dead end road sign) THIS JOB SUCKS!
END CUTAWAY:
SCENE 8:
Stallion: Hey. Can 你 idiots keep it down!
Saten: Hey. No need for that.
Stallion: Just shut up. Just go back to talking to the crossed eyed freak over there.
Saten: *angrily* Before I knock out every single one of your teeth.. I'm gonna give 你 a final chance to apologize for that remark.
Stallion: I NEVER apologize for the tru- (gets violently punched in the face, but surprisingly 由 Derpy instead of Saten).
Stallion: 你 aggressive woman! (runs off crying like baby).
Derpy: Wimp!
Saten: Wow... I am so proud of 你 wait now.
SCENE 9:
Saten and Derpy are seen sharing a weed joint, as only 'one' was able to be sneaked aboard.
Derpy: (stoned) I.. I'm telling you. T The only reason we die.. I Is because we except it as an inevitability.
Saten: ... (stoned laugh and points at the joint) This shit is AWESOME! (they both laugh, and high five).
SCENE 10:
Pinkie: Oh that.. That's Applejack.
Saten: She's.. Beauitful.
Derpy: Really? Not really something I'd look twice at. (looks at AJ again), No wait, never mind..
SCENE 11:
Everyone was enjoying the party except Saten who didn't come as he was still depressed from AJ having dumped him. And Derpy, being very protective of him and mad at AppleJack for upsetting him, tricked the western 小马 into having one of Derpy's 'special' muffins.
AJ: (eating it quickly) this is delicious. What's in it?
Derpy: Oh 你 know. Dough. Blueberries.. Bit of pot.
AJ: (nervously) What was that last part!?
Derpy: ... Raisins.
AJ: THAT'S NOT WHAT YA SAID!!
Derpy: Yeah.. 由 the way would 你 watch Dinky for me?
Saten: Well. I'm busy, but I'm sure I ca-
Derpy; Great! *gives him Dinky and flies out one of the windows*
Saten: Find.. Someone else.. *groans*
SCENE 12:
Saten: Derpy I need to your opinion about something?
Derpy: I was gonna tell 你 the same thing.
If I don't do something about this wrong 日 mishap, I'm not sure if Cranky Danky will ever forgive me.
Saten: (not listening) Trixie wants me to try being a better boyfriend. I'm not sure what to do.
Derpy: (also not listening) Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Saten: Maybe I should ask AppleJack for advice. She always tried making me a better boyfriend, but I wasn't listening at the time.. Classic me.
Derpy: I offered Danky a refund but it didn't help too much.
Saten: Perhaps I should bring an notepad. 列表 the things AppleJack will say..
Derpy: 你 know what? I'll probably end up making a 列表 of ways to fix this.
Saten: I'm glad we talked.
Derpy: I'm always here for 你 cousin.
Saten: Me too.
(they both get up and leave in different directions).
-------------------------------------------------------------------
BEST OF TRIXIE: (Saten's current girlfriend, and one of the few that actually understands him).
SCENE 1:
Trixie: I'm glad your finally over AppleJack.. Who needs her anyway. She didn't understand you.. 你 need someone who dose understand you.. Someone who 你 knew your entire life.
Saten: 你 mean Derpy?
Trixie: Well.. Sure.. Derpy.. But I meant some else who knew 你 for your entire life. And she always had a thing for you.. Who knows.. She might be sitting wait in front of you.
Saten: (oblivious) I honestly have no idea what your going on about Trixie. But your voice is soothing, and strangely I feel better.. (happily) Thanks, 你 always such a great friend.
Trixie: (sighs) Sure... Friend.
Saten: (gets up) Anyway. I gotta go.. Sorry again for trying to kill you, last time we were here.
Trixie: (shrugs) 你 were drunk.
Saten: If it makes 你 feel better. I'm really trying to cut back on alcohol.
Trixie: I sincerely doubt that.. But if 你 say.
Saten: (leaves).
Trixie: (sighs) Guess Trixie's paying again..
SCENE 2:
Saten: (flies over) Trixie, wait!.. Don't leave without saying good bye.
Trixie: Sorry.. I thought 你 were still mad at me.. I mean, I tried to kick Twilight out of town and then tried to do the same to you..
Saten: Yeah. About that.. Why me? Why were 你 so mad at me!?
Trixie: Ohh, I don't know.. Maybe it's the fact that 你 were the only one in high school that EVER cared for me.. That 你 meant the world to me.. That I LOVED you!.. But 你 never loved me back!.. Instead, 你 fallen for some unattractive Southern girl, instead of me!.. That I finally had enough of waiting for the 日 that 你 might finally come to your senses and realize who 你 should of been with!..
Saten: So... 你 don't like AppleJac-
Trixie: YES, I DON'T LIKE APPLEJACK!
SCENE 3:
Saten: I'm sorry., but I'm kinda broke these days..
Trixie: Oh., I have lots of spare money.
Saten: No, no.. I couldn't possibly take my girlfriends money like that.
Trixie: (playfully) but your fine with stealing her fries
Saten: Just the curly ones 你 don't like..
Trixie: No.. I 爱情 them, and save them for last, but their gone, cause 你 ate them..
SCENE 4:
Trixie: Kinda makes me glad MY childhood was so good..
AJ: (suspicious) Really?.. Tell me about it?
(several 分钟 later)
Trixie: (sobbing uncontrollably) I know my father wanted a boy!.. And he even called me slugger until I got to the age of developing as a woman.. And then he just STOPPED playing catch with me!.. And I wasn't slugger anymore.. (Blows nose).
AJ: (sitting, lessoning) Ah see.
Trixie: (still crying) And mom could of just 说 "Jack, she's a girl, get over it".. But she didn't! Not one word, the whole time! (cries into her own soft hooves).
SCENE 5:
Trixie: Sorry the doctor couldn't help you..
Saten: Well.. I didn't have much faith in him.. I'm quite use to being unloved..
Trixie: That's not true.. I will 'always' 爱情 你 Saten.
Saten: I know.. And thank you.
SCENE 6:
Saten: ... Well, I... I went to your show.
Trixie: Yes, and 你 beaten up my manager just for telling me I did a good job.
SCENE 1:
Saten: *drunkily* H 嘿 苹果白兰地
AppleJack: Are ya drunk 或者 something?
Saten: *dizzily* No I'm no- A little
AppleJack: *giggles* Y'all really need some sort of intervention. Ah mean this is the third time this week.
(Suddenly Saten Twist squeeze hugged her, even though it was clear 苹果白兰地 wasn't completely comfortable with it.)
Saten: I I 爱情 你 Applejack. Let's grow old together in everyway. (demonic voice) EVERY-WAY!
AppleJack *trying to push him off her*: Yeah.. About that.. Look. We only been on 'one' date. It didn't even end well,. But since then. Ya showed up at my house four times.. Uninvited.
Saten: Yeah.. So?
AppleJack: Look. Ah don't wanna seem like a mean girl, but. As ah told ya one hundred times before.. We're not a couple. So stop 表演 like we are.
Saten: *dumbly* I I don't understand?
SCENE 2:
Trixie: Thanks for taking me for lunch. Never been to this place.
Saten: Hey. Your a good friend.
Trixie: Thanks. So are you.
Saten: Is it true 你 took down a Ursa Major?
Trixie: No.. I just 说 that for popularity.
Saten Twist: Ohh... (gets angrier) Well your just a big fuckin lier aren't you!
Trixie: (nervously stands up)
Saten: (threateningly points one of the knives) SIT DOWN!
SCENE 3:
Saten: Hey. Nice perfamance.
SweetieBelle: Really!?. Everyone only cares about the stupid dresses. *sudden anger* This always happens! Rarity always outshines me.
Saten: Hey. Siblings do that.. In fact.. When I was your age. I won a ribbin at a science fair, my project was called "do Lima beans nurture under classical music". But my unimpressed mother simply just pointed out that it was a rip off of my older brother's project "do Lima beans grow better in rock and roll". And well.. I ended up losing the ribbon and it was 给 to my stinkin brother.
2 HOURS LATER
Saten: *now angrier* First off, the projects were completely differenty. I was 展示 the classic 音乐 'nurtures' Lima beans. But my stupid mother didn't lesson.. If your like to see the relationship between nurturing and growth, I'd like to point out that my brother is EIGHT INCHES TALLER THAN ME!
Saten: ... Anyway. I hope that helpe- (sees that Sweetie Belle must of ran off quite some time ago)
SCENE 4:
INSIDE A LOCAL BREWERY:
Saten: Fired!? Why am I fired!?
Boss pony: Cause 你 only been here a week, and 你 keep getting drunk on the samples.
Saten: Okay. Not gonna lie.. I 'might' be an acholalic.
Boss pony: *sarcastically* yeaaaah.. Kinda got that. Thanks for clarifying though.
SCENE 5:
Grape: I have to admit.. Derpy is a lot less attractive in person.
Saten: Oh. Is that so?
Grape: Yeah.. But baggers can't be choosers.
Saten: (fake laugh) good one... May I see your pen?
Grape: Uhh., Sure (gives him a pen from his pocket)
Saten: Thanks.. Now. What was that about Derpy?
Grape: That, she's kinda uglier in person.
Saten: I see... (suddenly, and aggressively, stabs the pen into GoldenGrapes leg, much to his intense pain)
Grape: What the fu-
Saten: (sadistically) HOW UGLY IS SHE NOW!?
SCENE 6:
Saten: I found 你 a present!
Twilight: What kinda prese- OH MY GOD!
Saten: *holding live snake* I found her outside. *gives the snake to Twilight. Cause he is too drunk to see her fear of it*
SCENE 7:
Twi: It's just.. 你 don't always seem to have everyone's best interest at heart.
Saten: Everyone's best interest.. Dude! I am a man of dignity!.. (smokes a large glass bong full of marijuana)
SCENE 8:
Saten: I'm Saten Twist.. And your prettier in person.
Luna: Well.. Thank you. But please don't get to close, 你 have bad breath. And a creepy look to you.
Saten: Well.. 你 could of just as easily thanked me for saving your 'royal a-
Celestia and Twilight: (desperately tries to change the subject)
Saten: (still to Luna) Bitch!
SCENE 9:
AJ: Look sugercube.. I'm sorry.. But Ah need ta 移动 on towards bigger, better, things.
Saten: ... Like meth?
AJ: (annoyed) No. Not like me-
Saten: Want some?
AJ: No ah don't wan- WHY DO YA HAVE METH!?
Saten: Relax. I don't use it. I only sell it..
SCENE 10:
Saten: (points at Trenderhoof while talking to AJ) I hear that nerd has a crush on you,
AJ: No need I be jealous.
Saten: Me. Jealous, no way.
AJ: Good because ah have enough to worry abou-
Saten: (to trenderhoof) I'LL KILL YOU!
SCENE 11:
Saten: ... A, Anyway. What 你 say cutie? Wanna be my girlfriend?
Trixie: ... Fine., but on two conditions.
Saten: Only two?.. That's 'already' better then AppleJack.
Trixie: One.. I am traveling a lot. And it dosen't look I'll be in Ponyville for quite some time.. So your have to call me everyday.
Saten: Sure. I can do that, no problem.
Trixie: Two.. 你 let me work on your jealousy.
Saten: What are 你 talking about? I never have jealousy..
Stallion: 嘿 Trixie, nice sho-
Saten: (angrily punches the stallion out cold) SHE'S MINNNE!
SCENE 12:
Waiter: Here are your napkins. (Gives them napkins)
Saten: (notices Trixie has 2 extra ones)
Saten: (sudden anger) Hey! Why dose she get more!?... ARE 你 HITTING ON HER!?
Waiter: Wha-
Saten: (pounds table) I WILL FUCK 你 UP!
Waiter: (runs off in fear)
Trixie: (sighs) Honey, I thought we talked about your jealously?
Saten: I'm trying., but I don't want to end like my father after h-
Waiter 2: (hands Trixie water) Here's your wat-
Saten: (leaps onto him and starts attacking him).
SOON AFTER:
Saten: (is literary thrown out of the restaurant).
SCENE 13:
Therapist: Uhh... Let's just skip into it.. She says 你 hate your dad.. How is he anyway?
Saten: Dead
Therapist: ... And your mother?
Saten: Killed him
Therapist: ... Wanna talk about that?
Saten; Just did
SCENE 14:
Derpy: Fine. Whatever. Just as long as nobody makes fun of.
Saten: Relax. No one is gonna make fun of yo-
Reggie: Hey! Nice eyes Derpy.. Makes 你 look even stupider then before..
Derpy: *whimpers*
Saten: Hey.. Screw off Reggie. Nobody likes you.
Reggie: Screw off.. But I only just started.. (containues making fun of Derpy).
Saten: Whatever.. I'm just trying to put this 刀 away (shows a 面包 knife).
Derpy: It goes in the 厨房 silly (chuckles)
Saten: Thank yo- (suddenly the famish rainboom happened, and it shook the ground causing Saten to loose his balance and unintentionally stab Reggie in the head, instantly killing him)
Derpy: (turning away from window) 嘿 cuz did 你 se- OH MY GOD!
Saten: I'm sorry!
Derpy: Is that Reggie!? DID 你 STAB REGGIE!?
Saten: It was an accident!
Derpy: How can it be an accident!?
Saten: I'M SOR-
SCENE 15:
Saten: So, in conclusion, I believe the painful sensation felt after passing a meal of spicy chillies is proof that the rectum does possess the sense of taste.
Trixie: ... I concur, but 你 changed the subject. What are we doing for hearts and hoove's Day?
Saten: ... Oh, 你 caught that, did you?
SCENE 16:
Trixie: *comes over and finds him*
Bartender: *sees her* Oh wow. She's she's a hottie.. I'm gonna stalk her later.
Saten: ... Are 你 a woman?
Bartender: No.
Saten: Good *punches out the bartender*
-------------------------------------------------------------------
MASTER SWORD: (Slightly insane, but good hearted, anti hero)
SCENE 1
Saten: *laughs* I can't wait to tell my friends!
Master Sword: For the last time! I'm not your friend!.. I never even met you.
Saten: Sure we are. 你 invited me to your birthday.
Master Sword: No. 你 'showed up' at my birthday.. I don't even know how 你 found my house.
Saten: Yeah. Yeah.. So 你 coming to mine?
Master Sword: No I... Fine.
SCENE 2:
Master Sword: *calling out* Don't dieeee!
SCENE 3:
Master sword (as an interviewer): 嘿 princess Twilight. Good having 你 here.
Twilight: Sure.
Sword: First off. How dose it feel being the forth princess ever?
Twilight: (barely even lessoning) Yes. I wouldn't be here without my friends.
Sword: That's nice. But the 问题 is, how dose it make 'you' feel. YOU!?
Twilight: (still barely lessoning) Yes. That is diffently a 问题 being asked. And I'm confident in my friends. And getting it done.
Sword: Okay.. Have to be honest with you. I feel like this interview. Is going absolutely nowhere. 你 answered 'none' of my questions. 你 kinda sound like a broken automatic response system, that's only been tought 4 phrases.
Twilight: (not lessening) Thanks. It's been an experience.
Sword: *annoyed* Yeah it has!
Twilight: *listing stuff about friendship*
Sword: What are yo- *looks behind him* Are 你 阅读 cue cards wait now!?.. What is this!?
Twilight: *still 阅读 off them*
Sword: (proving point to audience) What's your name lady!?
Twilight: .. Dedication.
Sword: (angrily to camera) Her name is dedication!.. 你 know what, (storming off) this interview is over!... *offview* WHERE'S GOD DAMN BEER!?
SCENE 4:
Derpy: Saten. He's not even as dorky as 你 say he is.
Sword: Wha-
Saten: Well.. I still loved pranking him anyway.
Derpy: (laughs) 你 did?..
Saten: Yes.. I remember I use to put fibreglass shards in his gym shorts. Every time he had to take a pee. He'd come back crying. *Saten and Derpy laugh*
Sword: It wasn't funny. It was painful.. Wasn't so much the fiber. As it was the glass!.. I had to get a urethra transplant.. And those are COSTLY!
Sword: 你 should hear his 更多 最近的 ones.. (to Saten) Tell her what 你 did a the other day.
Saten: Well.. I mailed a wild hog to house the other day.
Sword: (angrily) THERE'S GIANT PIG WITH HORNS! LIVING IN THE BASEMENT!
Saten: Plus.. The time before that. We were suppose to have a sleepover at his house., I was planning to sneak laxatives into his cereal.. But the sleep over got canceled so I couldn't get him with that one.
Derpy: Ohh... But the idea was still there.
Saten: Oh! Differently (they highfive)
Sword: (arrogantly) HE DIDN'T GET ME THOUGH! He didn't get me... DidyougetmeSaten? Didyougetme!?
Satan: No-
Sword: No! 你 did not get me!.. Who didn't get me... Saten Twist.
Saten: 你 know what.. Fuck it.. Fine. 你 guys can go out.. But only once.
Sword: Good enough. *leaves*
Sword: Alright Derpy.. Let's go.
Derpy: Fine.
Sword: Just remember one thing tonight. One thing.. Your cousin did NOT get me with poop thing..
SCENE 6:
Saten: (a 年 或者 two ago) Excuse me. I'm looking for the owner this business?
Mare: Wait though there (points at Master Swords office)
Saten: (starting going in).
Master Sword: (hiding behind wall) Come on. Come on.
Saten: (walks in) Excuse me I-
Sword: (tackles him and start violently beating him up)... (stops).. Sorry. (pants). I thought 你 were the mafia.
Saten: N No I'm Saten Twist.
Sword: Who?
Saten: I've been asked to interview you.
Sword: Interview!?. (eyes narrow) Well. 你 can't interview a dead man now CAN YOU! (jumps out the four story window, and ends up going into ambulance, and he waves evily to Saten, as Saten watches him get lifted into the ambulance).
SCENE 7:
Iron will: Welcome. To Iron wills 显示 on being assertive.. Here's how being assertive works. 你 take down who's bigger then you.. Example. Who's the toughest 小马 in the crowd?
Sword: (there with Fluttershy) Well. I don't mean to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the extinction o- (gets grabbed 由 Iron will and gets violently beaten up from off view).
Iron Will: Alright. Know who's the funniest?
Sword: I know my way around a jo- (starts getting beat up again).
Pony: For god sakes! Have some humility! It'll save your life!
SCENE 8:
Twilight: (sleeping soundly).. (she is suddenly awaken 由 a loud gunshot) WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!? (runs done stairs, and suddenly gasps)..
Master Sword: (holding pistol, and Santa Clause is seen laying dead from a bullet though his head).. (groans). Before 你 start.
Twilight: 耶稣 christ!
Master Sword: (annoyedly) Okay! Before, you, start!
Twilight: 冬青, 冬青树 SHIT!
Master Sword: (annoyed) 你 gonna let me explain!?
Twilight: (angry) Yes Sword! I would 爱情 to know why 你 shot and killed, FATHER CHRISTMAS!
Master Sword: ... He startled me!
Twilight: (annoyed) HE STARTLED YOU!?
Master Sword: He! Startled me!
Twilight: (sarcastically) Oh, guess he should apologize than!
Master Sword: Well. That'll be kinda hard, cause.. I shot him..
Twilight: Great... So what now.
Master Sword: Well. Looks like I better save Christmas..
Twilight: 你 can't be serious!?
Master Sword: I don't see any other opinion..
Twilight: ... 你 planned this, didn't you!?
Master sword: Whaaaaat!? No!
Twilight: 你 planned this! I know 你 did!
Master Sword: 你 honestly think I wou-
Spike: (comes out, in elf costume) 嘿 Sword. The sled is ready, an. (sees twilight). Uh oh..
(long pause).
Master Sword: 你 would not believe how cheap that elf costume was!
Twilight: (starts growling)
Master Sword: (happily) I 偷了 it.
Twilight: SWOOO-
Master Sword: LET ME HAVE MY NIGHTMARE BEFORE 圣诞节 MOMENT!
SCENE 9:
Saten finally took a train back to Ponyville.
Loud police voice: GET DOWN ON THE GROUND ASSHOLE! (Saten freaks out and hides on the ground surrendering) I'LL SHOOT YOUR LEGS OFF!
Master Sword: (comes into view, driving police car). Hahaha! Gotcha.. Naw, it's just me.
Saten: Sword? 你 scared th- Oh shit, did 你 steal cop car!?.. That's crazy!
Master Sword: No, what's crazy. Is leaving it unintended, anyone cold of 偷了 it.. Prove.. I did!
SCENE 10:
The cops from 小马 mov: FREEEEZE!
Saten: Oh shit! We're so dead!
Master Sword: Leave it to me... (To the 小马 mov cops), it's alright!.. We're cops!
(Long silence
Sword and Saten are suddenly thrown into a jail cell.
Master Sword: Damn it! I was so so sure that was gonna work!
SCENE 11:
Master Sword: See, told 你 my friend will get us out.
Saten: I guess... He creeps me out though.. He kept asking for an dirty picture of Twilight..
Master Sword: Oh yeah. Same way I have one for your Derpy
Saten: (angrily) WHAT!?
Master Sword: Yeah, have it over my wall-
Saten: (punches Sword in the face).
Master Sword: (holding his bloody nose) still worth it!
SCENE 12:
Derpy: I really messed up on those invitations! I feel just awful!
Master Sword: Why'd 你 bring me to Cake N' 培根 for our third date, I HATE this place!
Derpy: I told Cranky I could get 'em printed for cheap, but that meant hiring somebody with no experience using a printing press... Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Sword: To prove my hatred of this place, I'm gonna leave a lousy tip...under fifteen percent!... And then I'll send my meal back, even though it's EXACTLY what I ordered!
Derpy: Is it possible were having two different conversations?
Sword: How should I know, I'm not listening to you!
SCENE 13:
Dr. Hooves: What's in it for me?
Master Sword: How about the glory of me not breaking your arm for your earlier statement.
Dr. Hooves: All I 说 was she looks a bit slu-
Master Sword: (holds Hoove's arm painfully).
Dr. Hooves: OKAY! OKAY!
Master Sword: (releases).
Dr. Hooves: Shit! That's like some red army shit!
Master Sword: Not really, my dad used it on my 秒 sister.
Dr. Hooves: But 你 don't have a 秒 sister?
Master Sword: Exactly.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
DERPY: (Saten's tomboy and loving cousin., who sometimes takes weed).
SCENE 1:
Filly Derpy: *jumping on bed, but her eyes seen as normal and she dosen't have her cutie mark*
Filly Saten: 嘿 Derp. Quite that already, your gonna hurt yourself.
Filly Derpy: *subbornly* Shut up! Your not the boss of me.. *bangs her head on the roof, making her have the 交叉, 十字架 eyed disign*
Filly Saten: My god, your okay!?
Filly Derpy: *calmly and unaware of her new look* Sure, why do 你 ask?
SCENE 2:
Derpy: Yeah.. 由 the way would 你 watch Dinky for me?
Saten: Well. I'm busy, but I'm sure I ca-
Derpy; Great! *gives him Dinky and flies out one of the windows*
Saten: Find.. Someone else.. *groans*
SCENE 3:
Rainbow: Yeah. Well.. Least I never got my name and voice changed.
Derpy: *gasps* 你 swore you'd never speak of that!
Rainbow: Sure. Whatever 你 say, Ditzy..
SCENE 4:
Derpy: Ahh., here we are at last.. Grand Gollaping Galla.. It's so beauitfu- *bangs into someone*
Aqua: *rudely* Hey. Watch where your going lady.
Derpy: Don't have to be mea-
Aqua: *rudely* Just leave me alone! *leaves*
Derpy: *eyes narrow*
Derpy: *Sudden happiness* This place just gets better and better.
SCENE 5:
Saten: (pulls over the bully to Derpy) Now., apologize.
Pony: Okay.. I'm sorry your she's an idiot.
Saten: Hey!.. I'm gonna ask nicely. That 你 so my lovely cousin a little repect.
Pony: Your cousin.. Man. Your family must be so proud have so such smart ponies.
Saten: fuck 你 man.. This is your last warning.
Derpy: (somewhat annoyed) Cousin.. Just hit him already.
Saten: (evil grin, and grabs a pole like object) Anything for 你 sweetie.. (violently smashes the ponies face in, knocking out a few teeth)
Derpy: Much better..
SCENE 6:
Derpy: (anxiously pacing) Oh.. What if they find us!? I'm too cute for jail!
Saten: Relax.. Go 首页 and put 大麻 into some of your muffins.
Derpy: That's just it.. That's usually how I would handle this type of situation. But.. I'm just too frightened.
SCENE 7:
Derpy: This works out for the best. I was tired of my stupid, dead end job.
CUTAWAY:
Derpy: (literary hammering a dead end road sign) THIS JOB SUCKS!
END CUTAWAY:
SCENE 8:
Stallion: Hey. Can 你 idiots keep it down!
Saten: Hey. No need for that.
Stallion: Just shut up. Just go back to talking to the crossed eyed freak over there.
Saten: *angrily* Before I knock out every single one of your teeth.. I'm gonna give 你 a final chance to apologize for that remark.
Stallion: I NEVER apologize for the tru- (gets violently punched in the face, but surprisingly 由 Derpy instead of Saten).
Stallion: 你 aggressive woman! (runs off crying like baby).
Derpy: Wimp!
Saten: Wow... I am so proud of 你 wait now.
SCENE 9:
Saten and Derpy are seen sharing a weed joint, as only 'one' was able to be sneaked aboard.
Derpy: (stoned) I.. I'm telling you. T The only reason we die.. I Is because we except it as an inevitability.
Saten: ... (stoned laugh and points at the joint) This shit is AWESOME! (they both laugh, and high five).
SCENE 10:
Pinkie: Oh that.. That's Applejack.
Saten: She's.. Beauitful.
Derpy: Really? Not really something I'd look twice at. (looks at AJ again), No wait, never mind..
SCENE 11:
Everyone was enjoying the party except Saten who didn't come as he was still depressed from AJ having dumped him. And Derpy, being very protective of him and mad at AppleJack for upsetting him, tricked the western 小马 into having one of Derpy's 'special' muffins.
AJ: (eating it quickly) this is delicious. What's in it?
Derpy: Oh 你 know. Dough. Blueberries.. Bit of pot.
AJ: (nervously) What was that last part!?
Derpy: ... Raisins.
AJ: THAT'S NOT WHAT YA SAID!!
Derpy: Yeah.. 由 the way would 你 watch Dinky for me?
Saten: Well. I'm busy, but I'm sure I ca-
Derpy; Great! *gives him Dinky and flies out one of the windows*
Saten: Find.. Someone else.. *groans*
SCENE 12:
Saten: Derpy I need to your opinion about something?
Derpy: I was gonna tell 你 the same thing.
If I don't do something about this wrong 日 mishap, I'm not sure if Cranky Danky will ever forgive me.
Saten: (not listening) Trixie wants me to try being a better boyfriend. I'm not sure what to do.
Derpy: (also not listening) Oh, I wish there was a way I could go back in time and fix all this.
Saten: Maybe I should ask AppleJack for advice. She always tried making me a better boyfriend, but I wasn't listening at the time.. Classic me.
Derpy: I offered Danky a refund but it didn't help too much.
Saten: Perhaps I should bring an notepad. 列表 the things AppleJack will say..
Derpy: 你 know what? I'll probably end up making a 列表 of ways to fix this.
Saten: I'm glad we talked.
Derpy: I'm always here for 你 cousin.
Saten: Me too.
(they both get up and leave in different directions).
-------------------------------------------------------------------
BEST OF TRIXIE: (Saten's current girlfriend, and one of the few that actually understands him).
SCENE 1:
Trixie: I'm glad your finally over AppleJack.. Who needs her anyway. She didn't understand you.. 你 need someone who dose understand you.. Someone who 你 knew your entire life.
Saten: 你 mean Derpy?
Trixie: Well.. Sure.. Derpy.. But I meant some else who knew 你 for your entire life. And she always had a thing for you.. Who knows.. She might be sitting wait in front of you.
Saten: (oblivious) I honestly have no idea what your going on about Trixie. But your voice is soothing, and strangely I feel better.. (happily) Thanks, 你 always such a great friend.
Trixie: (sighs) Sure... Friend.
Saten: (gets up) Anyway. I gotta go.. Sorry again for trying to kill you, last time we were here.
Trixie: (shrugs) 你 were drunk.
Saten: If it makes 你 feel better. I'm really trying to cut back on alcohol.
Trixie: I sincerely doubt that.. But if 你 say.
Saten: (leaves).
Trixie: (sighs) Guess Trixie's paying again..
SCENE 2:
Saten: (flies over) Trixie, wait!.. Don't leave without saying good bye.
Trixie: Sorry.. I thought 你 were still mad at me.. I mean, I tried to kick Twilight out of town and then tried to do the same to you..
Saten: Yeah. About that.. Why me? Why were 你 so mad at me!?
Trixie: Ohh, I don't know.. Maybe it's the fact that 你 were the only one in high school that EVER cared for me.. That 你 meant the world to me.. That I LOVED you!.. But 你 never loved me back!.. Instead, 你 fallen for some unattractive Southern girl, instead of me!.. That I finally had enough of waiting for the 日 that 你 might finally come to your senses and realize who 你 should of been with!..
Saten: So... 你 don't like AppleJac-
Trixie: YES, I DON'T LIKE APPLEJACK!
SCENE 3:
Saten: I'm sorry., but I'm kinda broke these days..
Trixie: Oh., I have lots of spare money.
Saten: No, no.. I couldn't possibly take my girlfriends money like that.
Trixie: (playfully) but your fine with stealing her fries
Saten: Just the curly ones 你 don't like..
Trixie: No.. I 爱情 them, and save them for last, but their gone, cause 你 ate them..
SCENE 4:
Trixie: Kinda makes me glad MY childhood was so good..
AJ: (suspicious) Really?.. Tell me about it?
(several 分钟 later)
Trixie: (sobbing uncontrollably) I know my father wanted a boy!.. And he even called me slugger until I got to the age of developing as a woman.. And then he just STOPPED playing catch with me!.. And I wasn't slugger anymore.. (Blows nose).
AJ: (sitting, lessoning) Ah see.
Trixie: (still crying) And mom could of just 说 "Jack, she's a girl, get over it".. But she didn't! Not one word, the whole time! (cries into her own soft hooves).
SCENE 5:
Trixie: Sorry the doctor couldn't help you..
Saten: Well.. I didn't have much faith in him.. I'm quite use to being unloved..
Trixie: That's not true.. I will 'always' 爱情 你 Saten.
Saten: I know.. And thank you.
SCENE 6:
Saten: ... Well, I... I went to your show.
Trixie: Yes, and 你 beaten up my manager just for telling me I did a good job.
#5: WINDWAKERGUY430:
So.. He may seem innocent enough, but he most gets mad at about everything.
But hey.. If a sitcom spoof that turns into a shootout for no god damn reason, is your kind of humour.. Than have fun.. Weirdo's
#4: JADE_23:
........... Thought I would of had something for Jade, but guess not.
#3: CANADA24:
Basically he's someone who reviews certain shows, like Hellsing for example, but only says "mwa" instead of actually INTELLIGENT reviews.
And most of his "humour" is no different than Wind.. In fact he steals Wind's idea a lot.. Usually making them even 更多 mean spirited and unfunny..
#2: AQUAMARINE
Just avoid her in general, she's weird..
#1: EVERYONE ELSE:
Their all dicks.. With an odd acceptation of people like those people that rant about 鸭, 德雷克 and Josh. Their the REAL human beings..
So.. He may seem innocent enough, but he most gets mad at about everything.
But hey.. If a sitcom spoof that turns into a shootout for no god damn reason, is your kind of humour.. Than have fun.. Weirdo's
#4: JADE_23:
........... Thought I would of had something for Jade, but guess not.
#3: CANADA24:
Basically he's someone who reviews certain shows, like Hellsing for example, but only says "mwa" instead of actually INTELLIGENT reviews.
And most of his "humour" is no different than Wind.. In fact he steals Wind's idea a lot.. Usually making them even 更多 mean spirited and unfunny..
#2: AQUAMARINE
Just avoid her in general, she's weird..
#1: EVERYONE ELSE:
Their all dicks.. With an odd acceptation of people like those people that rant about 鸭, 德雷克 and Josh. Their the REAL human beings..
I forgot about this show..
I'm not watching Death Note anymore..
For all those saying, 你 don't like it cause 你 haven't watched it.
Well, I HAVE watched it.
Truth is, I don't care about ANY of those characters, and what happens to them.
Sorry Aqua, this includes L..
So, yeah, sticking to Monster..
Here's to hoping something INTERESTING happens soon.
It's getting a bit dull..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I'm not watching Death Note anymore..
For all those saying, 你 don't like it cause 你 haven't watched it.
Well, I HAVE watched it.
Truth is, I don't care about ANY of those characters, and what happens to them.
Sorry Aqua, this includes L..
So, yeah, sticking to Monster..
Here's to hoping something INTERESTING happens soon.
It's getting a bit dull..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
#1: He CAN be funny:
But he never seems to try too hard.
Eight Crazy Nights shows how much he wastes his OWN talents..
#2: I actually LIKE his normal voice:
But, I'm guessing that he thinks it is funny to sound as annoying as possible, even though his normal voice is WAY funnier, than a tone deaf voice..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
But he never seems to try too hard.
Eight Crazy Nights shows how much he wastes his OWN talents..
#2: I actually LIKE his normal voice:
But, I'm guessing that he thinks it is funny to sound as annoying as possible, even though his normal voice is WAY funnier, than a tone deaf voice..
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1☆ everything i do, i do it for you
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
2☆ please forgive me
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
3☆ summer of '69
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
4☆ heaven
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
5☆ run to you
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
6☆ straight from the heart
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
7☆ here i am
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
8☆ somebody
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
9☆ never let go
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
10☆ kids wanna rock
☆.☆.☆.☆.☆.
1: Clearence Little:
The corrupt cop Francis McCreary wants Clearence dead for reasons explained in the beginning cut away (most of them self centred).
I don't really like killing this guy, despite the fact he tries to kill 你 later in a 随意 encounter.
He's still was pleading for life, and Niko doesn't seem like the type who would kill someone on their knees... Unless it's friggin Dimitri.
If 你 do the excutution 移动 on him, Niko will even apologize for having killed him..
2: Dwayne Forge
I always kill 花花公子 instead of Dwayne.
Cause Dwayne is such a nice guy, and it makes me feel 更多 guilty..
The corrupt cop Francis McCreary wants Clearence dead for reasons explained in the beginning cut away (most of them self centred).
I don't really like killing this guy, despite the fact he tries to kill 你 later in a 随意 encounter.
He's still was pleading for life, and Niko doesn't seem like the type who would kill someone on their knees... Unless it's friggin Dimitri.
If 你 do the excutution 移动 on him, Niko will even apologize for having killed him..
2: Dwayne Forge
I always kill 花花公子 instead of Dwayne.
Cause Dwayne is such a nice guy, and it makes me feel 更多 guilty..
episode: ALL ABOUT THE MORMONS
Stan refuses to become Greg's friend, because he believe's his family religion is stupid, and the family is disturbingly nice..
But Greg later approaches Stan, saying he won't try to be his friend anymore, and also uses the following speech...
"Look, maybe us Mormons do believe in crazy stories that make absolutely no sense, and maybe Joseph Smith did make it all up, but I have a great life. and a great family, and I have the Book of Mormon to thank for that. The truth is, I don't care if Joseph Smith made it all up, because what the church teaches now is loving your family, being nice and helping people. And even though people in this town might think that's stupid, I still choose to believe in it. All I ever did was try to be your friend, Stan, but you're so high and mighty 你 couldn't look past my religion and just be my friend back. You've got a lot of growing up to do, buddy. Suck my balls."
Stan refuses to become Greg's friend, because he believe's his family religion is stupid, and the family is disturbingly nice..
But Greg later approaches Stan, saying he won't try to be his friend anymore, and also uses the following speech...
"Look, maybe us Mormons do believe in crazy stories that make absolutely no sense, and maybe Joseph Smith did make it all up, but I have a great life. and a great family, and I have the Book of Mormon to thank for that. The truth is, I don't care if Joseph Smith made it all up, because what the church teaches now is loving your family, being nice and helping people. And even though people in this town might think that's stupid, I still choose to believe in it. All I ever did was try to be your friend, Stan, but you're so high and mighty 你 couldn't look past my religion and just be my friend back. You've got a lot of growing up to do, buddy. Suck my balls."
In celebration of finally beating Red Dead 2.. Here's best 语录 of new protagonst, Arthur Morgan..
#1:
Arthur: Damn Marston. That's smart.. 你 might the only guy I know, to be half eaten 由 wolves, and come back a smarter man..
#2:
Arthur: As long as we get paid 或者 你 get shot I'm happy.
#3:
Arthur: Maybe when your mother is finished mourning your father... I'll keep her in black, on your behalf.
#4:
Arthur: John made it. He's the only one. Rest of us... No.
#5:
Arthur: This whole thing is pretty much done. We're 更多 ghosts than people.
#6:
Tommy: Come on than pretty boy!
Arthur: Pretty boy? You're kidding me, Pretty Boy!?
#7:
Micah: Seems were the only ones crazy enough to be out here.
Arthur: Don't speak to me about 'crazy'.
#8:
Arthur: I gave 你 all I had....
#1:
Arthur: Damn Marston. That's smart.. 你 might the only guy I know, to be half eaten 由 wolves, and come back a smarter man..
#2:
Arthur: As long as we get paid 或者 你 get shot I'm happy.
#3:
Arthur: Maybe when your mother is finished mourning your father... I'll keep her in black, on your behalf.
#4:
Arthur: John made it. He's the only one. Rest of us... No.
#5:
Arthur: This whole thing is pretty much done. We're 更多 ghosts than people.
#6:
Tommy: Come on than pretty boy!
Arthur: Pretty boy? You're kidding me, Pretty Boy!?
#7:
Micah: Seems were the only ones crazy enough to be out here.
Arthur: Don't speak to me about 'crazy'.
#8:
Arthur: I gave 你 all I had....
